May 2022 – Growing Up Not Old

A Few Quick Thoughts on Memorial Day

Today we celebrate Memorial Day for those who lost their lives in battle. Like many of you, I will be spending this day with friends. I am lucky enough to have the day off work.

I have many family members who have served in the military. Fortunately, none of them lost their lives in battle. Still, it’s important to just take a moment out of this day to say thank you to those who did. Not only to the service men and women who gave their lives, but also to their families who lost a part of themselves on the battlefield.

So today, raise a glass to all the brave men and women of the past. Thank them for their sacrifice and make sure to live a life every day that is worthy of that sacrifice.

What I’ve Learned… So Far

Interviewing others about making major life transitions after 50 has been the best research I ever could have done as I reimagine my own future.

Last year, with the help of my friends Bill and Bunny, I came up with the idea for this blog. I have been amazed, and continue to be amazed, that this couple made the decision to sell everything and move to Bonaire. Their bravery or craziness, inspired me to think about other friends who had major like changes after 50. I told their story in my first post.

Starting this blog has been one of the most fun and exciting adventures I have pursued in a very long time. I find that I love talking to people and telling their stories. Each one is so unique and almost everyone has told me that they didn’t think they are special and weren’t sure they had a story to share.

However, I have found that each person has something to teach me as I prepare for my own re-imagination into the world of retirement.

It’s challenging leaving behind a place I have worked for the past 15 years. As I prepare to leave, I reflect on all I have accomplished and all the people I have helped and those who have helped me along the way. I am trying to let go of the frustrations and failures and focus on the good so I can move on into the next phase of my life.

I tell people that from 1 to 30 years old, we are forming into the people we are going to be. From 30 to 60 years old, we concentrate on working, taking care of of spouses, children and/or parents. Now, from 60 to 90 years old, at least for me, is going to be about me and what I want to do.

So, my blog is research project as I graduate from a traditional work environment into whatever the rest of my life will be. As I interview people, I have discovered a few key tips to make the transition go more smoothly.

Review Your Finances — Look at how much revenue you will have coming in after you transition. Talk to an expert if possible. Determine what expenses are necessary and what you can do without.
Pay Down Your Debt — As one interviewee said, “Debt is like being a slave to the bank.” Every day you are working to pay that money back, plus interest. Be as debt-free as possible when you leave your full-time gig.
Plan For Fun — If you put yourself on a restrictive budget, you will feel deprived. If you can’t manage fun on your retirement income, figure out a part-time gig that will help generate income. For Bridget in Curacao, that gig was opening up an Italian ice stand to serve tourist coming off the cruise ships.
Plan for the Unexpected — Each one of my interviewees have had a setback. Many of them related to COVID. But they made it through, even though it wasn’t easy.
Find Your Passion — What do you love? For Steve Blechschmidt, it was the guitar. Every day he practices for hours perfecting his unique finger style guitar playing.
Never Stop Learning — Some people are practicing their passion every day, some are taking classes or reading books, for me I am researching by meeting people and hearing their stories.

I’ve never had the luxury of figuring out what I want to do. I have been more focused on what I could do to make money to support my family. Now, I have been given this gift of time.

I invite you to come along on my journey or better yet, become a part of it. I am always looking for new people to be a part of my blog. If you have made a major life change after 50, or you know someone who has, email me at ksparis15@gmail.com. I want to tell your story.

Thanks for supporting my blog so far and as my mother-in-law used to say, “The best is yet to come!”

Taking Center Stage

When Joya Fields needed a new career, she used her life long passion for design to begin a staging business.

At an age when many people are thinking of retirement, Joya Fields decided to begin a new career as a stager.

Stagers are the people that go into a house before it is put on the market and make it more appealing to buyers. Even in this hot real estate market, stagers are in high demand because in a 2021 RESA survey of 4600 properties, 73% of staged properties sold over list price and staged houses sold approximately 9 days faster than unstaged.

Joya always had an eye for design. As a child, she would use the stairs of her home to create an apartment building for Barbie and her friends. Each apartment was unique.

But it wasn’t until her brother-in-law, who is a real estate agent, asked for her help in staging a home that sat on the market too long that Joya thought she could make a living with those same designing skills. After Joya worked her magic, there were multiple offers in a week.

With a few more successes and encouragement from her family, Joya decided to make a career change.

Early Career as a Writer

For many years, Joya worked as a published author and freelance writer. In fact, she has over 35 books to her credit, most of which are romantic suspense novels. She has has written over 50 articles for various magazines including Maryland Family, True Confessions and True Romance. However, when her husband retired 10 years earlier than they had originally planned, Joya knew she needed a career that paid more money. “I knew it was this, work full-time or start waitressing,” Joya said with a chuckle.

Becoming a Professional Stager

But before she could begin as a serious stager, Joya knew it was important to get certified. Being certified to stage houses is not required in Maryland, but Joya thought it would make her more marketable. So, she signed up for a Home Staging Class at the Home Staging Resource www.homestagingresource.com

**Before and After Professional Staging**

She credits that class as the reason she is so successful. “The teacher was so good,” Joya said. As a lifelong learner, she saw it as a great way to learn the basics. “You need to know the rules in order to break the rules,” she said.

With her natural eye towards design and the knowledge from her course, Joya started working with several area real estate agents staging homes. She invested money from her savings and began purchasing in items that could be used to stage homes.

Although successful, Joya decided to join forces with one of the other students from her online staging class. She merged her business with Shamrock Hill Design.

Joining a Team

Shamrock Hill consists of four women responsible for design and staging and a stay-at-home dad that works as their mover. He’s responsible for moving everything they need for staging from the warehouse. The company stages homes in Baltimore County, Howard County, Carroll County and Anne Arundel County.

“The difference between being an interior designer and a stager is that one creates a home for you to live in, the other helps buyers see themselves living in a home,” Joya said.

One of the benefits of working with a company is that she has a whole warehouse at her disposal to stage homes. There are pillows, rugs, pictures, etc., everything she needs for staging a home. Many of the items come from Costco. Home Goods and At Home, but sometimes they find a treasure at Goodwill. If they need books for staging, they get them from the local library.

The other benefit of working with a company is that there are other people to do the paperwork and marketing, two tasks that Joya does not enjoy. “Now, I get to do what I really like,” Joya said.

There are many levels of service available. Many times she will work with the furniture the home owner already has and just move it around or add to it. However, Joya can also come in and refurnish a vacant home to sell. “Each house is different and each one tells a story,” she said.

Recently, Joya decided to expand her business by becoming a certified Residential Transition Specialist. With this training Joya will be able to help older individuals with “right-sizing” or “down-sizing”. This training focuses on helping people declutter and get their homes ready for the market.

Joya loves working with older people and often finds herself spending hours talking to them about their lives when she goes in for a consultant.

Joya stages about 10 houses a month and “I fall in love with every one of them,” Joya said. The process begins when the real estate agent engages her as a consultant. Joya prepares a 15- page report detailing what needs to be done in each room. Then, it is up to the home owner to decide whether or not to hire her to implement the report.

There are multiple levels of service and Joya works with the homeowner to determine what they need. Even though she charges a set fee, rather than a percentage she says, “We love it when people make more money.”

Her Other “Full-Time” Job

But Joya doesn’t spend all her time staging homes. Joya and her husband Joey moved in with their son to help take care of their grandson. They live on a large piece of land in Randallstown. Joya said when she comes home from her appointments she puts on her jeans and goes to work. She’ll spend the rest of the day working on the farm feeding chickens, gathering eggs and working in the garden.

Her other responsibilities involve being “Gigi” to her grandson. She loves the flexibility of her job which allows her to attend his t-ball games, school events and just spend time with him. “I didn’t want a 9 to 5 job. I wanted something with flexibility.”

Joya was a little nervous starting her new career. She had to take money out of her family’s saving with no guarantee that she would be successful. However, she credits her teacher with setting her up for success. Although at times she doubted herself, her instructor said, “Fake it till you make it.”

Joya continues to be supported by her co-workers as well as fellow stagers in the staging Facebook group. “When I had a problem recently and couldn’t figure out, I put it out to the group,” she said. They had great ideas that help her resolve her issue.

“It’s a great community of women helping women,” Joya said.

Joya is also still finding some time to write. She is responsible for the company blog and has also submitted a proposal for her farm story. “It’s really been bugging me. I need to get back to writing.”

Whatever the challenge, Joya meets it with a smile and a desire to learn. “I love learning,” Joya said.

If you are interested in finding out more about being a stager, you can find out more information at the Real Estate Staging Association.

If you know someone who would make a great subject for this blog, contact me at ksparis15@gmail.com.

Staying Positive While Facing Challenges

Whether it’s losing her job or losing 70 pounds, Janet faces her challenges with a smile and a positive attitude.

When Janet Streit was called into her supervisor’s office on March 21, 2022 in the middle of the day, she had an idea what was going to happen. When she saw the HR person sitting there, she was sure of it.

But when they told her that her job had been eliminated, Janet had a different reaction from most. She said, “Thank you. I’ve been looking for a sign that it was that it was time to retire.” In fact, the Saturday before, she had put something in her journal about it. She now had that sign.

At 68, Janet had considered retiring even before this happened. She had even contacted the retirement specialist, but there was a problem. “I loved my job,” said Janet.

She had worked as a volunteer manager at a hospital in Florida for 9 years managing approximately 200 volunteers. Then COVID hit and volunteers were no longer allowed in the hospital. But Janet, never one to sit around, offered to work screening individuals coming into the hospital. Then she took over the scheduling of staff to screen people entering the hospital. When screening was outsourced, she helped the transition with the new company. After 18 months, volunteers began returning once again to the hospital and Janet was able to get back to her “real” job.

However, COVID hit hospitals hard. Many hospitals actually lost revenue due to the fact that auxiliary services were limited and individuals didn’t want to go to hospitals for fear of catching COVID. Janet knew that the loss of her job was a financial decision and she wasn’t bitter at all.

But Janet is never bitter. She faces life with an enthusiasm that overflows into every aspect of her life. She fills her day with journal writing, meditative walks, recording gratitudes and setting her intentions.

She began her spiritual approach to life as she took her her role as caretaker with her mother. That spiritual part of life intensified while living and working on a biodynamic organic farm in 2010 after the death of her mother. Janet had been working as the volunteer director at Greater Baltimore Medical Center when her mother passed after struggling with Alzheimer’s for nine-years. Janet needed a fresh start. She moved to the White Rose Farm in Taneytown, MD as the business associate and started doing their marketing to promote it.

On the farm, Janet was exposed to many new spiritual practices that the owner encouraged on the farm. She credits her personal practices with not only her positive attitude towards life, but also her good health.

For example, Janet is one of the few people who lost weight during COVID. A long time WW (Weight Watchers) member, Janet applied those practices to her life during COVID and actually completed her journey to her lifetime goal losing over 70 pounds. She has now applied to be a WW coach after being encouraged by her own WW coach to do so.

Navigating the Transition

Just because Janet took the news of her job elimination well, did not mean that she was without fear. The hospital had a retirement transition specialist that Janet was able to work with. Before the meeting, they asked Janet to get together all of her financial records, expenses and investment records. She said it took two weeks to get everything together. After careful examination of everything, she was told, she could maintain her current lifestyle until she was 97.

Two things helped Janet be so financially secure. The first was the pension she received from working with the Girl Scouts of the USA. “They are all about helping women, so they offered a strong pension,” Janet said. In addition, Janet is debt-free. She has no house payment, no car payment and no credit card debt. When she asked the advisor what to do about possible unexpected expenses like replacing her 7-year-old car he said, “That’s what your investments are for.”

Her advisor was also impressed because when Janet created her expenses for the month, she included things like travel, hobbies, going out and having fun. He said, many people don’t remember to include those items, but Janet is all about having enjoying life. “I’m not talking about being frivolous, just about having fun,” she likes to clarify.

Janet may have needed more reassurance than most because she is single. “A few years ago I said ‘You just got you babe,” Janet said.

Taking Chances

But that has never prevented her from taking on new challenges and making big changes. After two years at the farm, Janet knew she needed to make money because “I didn’t have any,” she said. While visiting her brother in Florida, Janet got a job offer from the zoo and they paid for her to move down there. She was then able to get other jobs helping form a farm cooperative and working with the local Food Bank before securing her position at the hospital.

What’s Next?

Now, Janet has different goals for her next job, “I need something that feeds my soul. Something that gives me joy,” Janet said. That was one of the reasons she applied at WW. Not only has it helped her lost 70 pounds, but she has also learned to transform any recipe into something points-friendly. (See the end of the blog for her borscht recipe.) She wants to share her knowledge and experience and commitment to the program with others.

She loves the fact that at this point in her life she is not worried about making money, “There’s such freedom in not having to make a specific dollar amount,” Janet said.

Although her plans are somewhat unclear and she describes her life as “chaotic”, Janet is sure everything will work out. She believes in putting out her intentions to create the life she wants. Recently, she returned from a walk and drew a mandala, a kind of drawing meditation. She said she has drawn several of these at pivotal points in her life. This one she titled, “Keep moving towards abundance.”

Her friend on the farm always said, “Assume you have enough.” Janet said she has a different philosophy, “Live in abundance.” To her abundance is not simply about money. It is more about enjoying a joyful and meaningful life.

She fills her day connecting with friends and her brother, doing 3-5 mile meditative walks, cooking low point meals and piddling in her patio garden.

She is currently planning a trip to the Adirondacks with her brother and seeing what happens next. Janet is not sure that volunteering will be part of her plan because it would “feel too much like work” after working for years as a volunteer coordinator.

Her advice to others is “Figure out what you want in life and go for it. All anyone wants is there for them if we open to it and notice it unfolding. Life is good!”

If you know someone you think would make a good subject for this blog, email: ksparis15@gmail.com.

We All Scream for Italian Ice!

Bridget and her husband Dave moved to Curacao they new they couldn’t retire, but they wanted to do something fun. An Italian Ice cart was the perfect answer.

When Bridget Merker and her husband Dave first visited Curaçao in 2012, they immediately felt at home. “I could live here,” Dave said. So, in 2017, when a job became available at the desalination plant in Curaçao, it was not surprising that Dave, an industrial engineer, decided to apply. After extensive negotiations, the job seemed like a reality.

They were so sure Dave was going to get the job that they prepared their Virginia home to be put on the market. Then the company sold the division and the job disappeared.

However, they already scheduled a vacation to Curaçao and decided to go anyway. During their time on the island, they looked into the practical aspects of moving there. They rented a car explored the island, looked at real estate options and determined what it would take to live there.

After “crunching the numbers” they knew completely retiring was not an option. Bridget was only 48 at this time. However, a semi-retirement was definitely feasible. “We always wanted to retire early, but not as early as we did,” she said. “It was doable.” But they had to think of what they could do part-time.

Bridget, who had always been in the hospitality business, thought about getting a job at a hotel, but that would have required her to be fluent in both Dutch and Papiamentu, a Spanish and Portuguese-based creole language spoken in the Dutch Caribbean.

Then, they remembered that during their previous visits, the island had almost everything except Italian Ice. There were no cool, refreshing, dairy free treats for tourists to enjoy like the treats from their childhood summers. They knew they had a winner of an idea. The only issue was whether to call it Italian ice like they did in Bridget’s native New Jersey or water ice like they did in Dave’s home town of Philly. They decided on “Caribbean Breeze Italian Ice.”

Moving to Curaçao

Although it was terrible time to sell a house in 2017 in Charlottesville, VA, they got an offer on their house. So, they packed up their stuff and moved to Curaçao to develop their Italian ice business.

First, they contacted a service to help them with the immigration paperwork. They decided to use an immigration attorney to help them navigate the process. Bridget said it was worth it to use the service. “They were so thorough,” Bridget said. Her permanent residency status was approved in 8 days and her husband’s was approved in 20.

However, since they weren’t buying property, Bridget and Dave had to show a specific amount of money in the bank.

Overall, it was easy. ”It’s very simple. Americans are treated like Dutch who want to move to the island,” Bridget said.

Finding a New Home

Bridget and Dave were open to many options as long as it was within their price range. Sometimes, convincing realtors that they weren’t Americans where price was no object was a challenge.

Initially, they ended up moving to a residential area on the East side of the island. They had a king size bed, couches, dresser, etc. in a shipping container headed to Curaçao and needed a place to fit it all.

“If I had to do any thing different,” Bridget said. “I wouldn’t have brought my stuff. I would have rented a furnished apartment here.”

Although the house was nice and affordable, it had no view of the water and there was too much traffic on their way to work. “After almost 2 years of living here and having dreamt about living here for years, I wanted to have a nicer view ,” Bridget said. They ended up moving to a much smaller condo closer to downtown that had a view of the Caribbean Sea and ended up selling much of their furniture. Now they have a beautiful view and have a 10 minute drive to work.

Caribbean Breeze Italian Ice

Bridget and Dave began Caribbean Breeze Italian Ice with a stand that Dave build himself. “At first, it was challenging because people didn’t know the product,” Bridget said. But that didn’t deter them.

They moved from the stand to a cart in order to be more mobile. They decided against a store front because they didn’t want to work all the time. Also, since their target audience is mostly tourists, they worked when the cruise ships were in port.

They take their cart into Punda, Curaçao’s historic downtown, near the Queen Emma floating bridge. “I work in a UNESCO World Heritage site,” Bridget said. (The whole downtown area of Curaçao is a UNESCO World Heritage site.)

They operate their cart when the cruise ships are in port. There are six flavors of this cool tasty treat: Piña Colada, Blue Raspberry, Watermelon, Mango, Cherry and Lemon. Piña Colada is the most popular flavor. It’s a bargain at $3 American dollars apiece or $5 Guilders (the local currency in Curaçao).

Free Time on Curaçao

When not working, Bridget loves exploring the island, visiting with friends and running typical errands like grocery shopping. Every Sunday, they go to the beach with friends. There are over 45 beaches on Curacao and they have been to most of them. But they have a special local beach they like the best. ”It is not the most photographed beach, but we love it there,” Bridget said.

Bridget also likes spending time at the 28 museums on the island. “If there is one thing, I miss about the United States it’s the museums,” Bridget said. However, in addition to the museums, there is amazing street art that is popping up all over town.

The biggest change for Bridget is that she was a type A person and still is, but she has now dialed it back. She feels healthier being outside all the time and is enjoying the warm weather. She always imagined herself on an island when she was working in the corporate world, saving for that seven-day vacation. “But now I never want to go back to working for someone else,” Bridget said. “We’re outside so much. It’s a healthier lifestyle.” They also spend a lot of their time in the sea, snorkeling and swimming. “I’d rather be in the sea than the pool and I hate the gym,” Bridget said.

Another big change since moving to the island is that they now don’t hang out at touristy places. “When we first moved here, we went where the tourist went. Then a friend showed us a little hole in the wall with great food. We loved it,” Bridget said. Bridget and Dave have met locals who have shown them all the best local places: shopping, restaurants, bars and beaches.

Challenges in Paradise

When COVID hit in March 2020, their business was shut down for about 16 months. They had to spend a lot of time together in their little apartment. Bridget said she reached out to other ex-pats on the ABC islands (Aruba, Bonaire, Curaçao). That’s where she connected with Bill Horton from my first blog.

It was challenging, but luckily they had money in the bank. She was glad they had emergency fund saved before moving down to Curaçao because “you never know when something like a pandemic might happen.”

Eventually, they got back to business and then got hit again. In late December 2021, Curaçao got hit with COVID again, but they didn’t stress, they just decided to take a month off.

The other challenge besides COVID was leaving family and friends back in the states.

The Best Part of Making a Big Move

Bridget and Dave are happy with their decision in spite of the fact that there have been some challenges. “We love working for ourselves,” Bridget said.

The best part of semi-retirement on Curacao? “Freedom,” Bridget and Dave said together. “If we want to go somewhere we go. If we want to sleep in we do,” Bridget said.

However, Bridget said their life might not be for everyone. If you’re thinking about a big move Bridget said, “Go for it, but do the research,” she said.

If you want to find out more about Caribbean Breeze Italian ice, follow them on Facebook, Instagram and TripAdvisor.

If you know someone that would make a good subject for my blog, email me at ksparis15@gmail.com.