Happy New Year! Yes, I know it’s March, but I’ve been busy. This retirement thing is harder than it looks.
Really, I have been busy planning the next phase of my retirement. We’re moving!
When people find out I’m moving, the first thing people ask me is if we are moving to Margaritaville in South Carolina. After my blog in Wasting Away Again in Margaritaville – Not! , many people assumed we were moving down south. However there was one problem with Margaritaville, it wasn’t in Maryland.
I have lived in the same town (except for a brief time during college) for the past 61 years and I currently live a mile and a half from where I grew up. I have had a great life here and we lovingly compare my hometown to Mayberry, So why move?
Like many people, our family home just seems too big for us these days. We have a home over 3,000 square feet and a lawn that requires a great deal of maintenance. In addition, many of the original owners are moving out and younger families are moving in. It’s a natural cycle for many established neighborhoods. So, I decided it was time to move.
I say I because my husband has been exploring other options for years. Ever since he retired in 2020, he has been sending me house listings, mainly in Delaware. However for me, a move to Delaware is almost like moving to South Carolina. With a 2 1/2-hour drive, we would need to give up seeing our friends on a regular basis, our doctors and our hair stylist. The last one is very important to us. She’s amazing. I would mention her name, but it’s difficult enough to get an appointment with her.
So with my parameters in mind, my husband began his search. There are many wonderful places to live in Maryland and they are all very different.
We had a list when we began our search. Honestly, the home we ultimately chose did not have everything on the list But just like the ultimate choices people make on House Hunters, no house had everything we wanted.
Our number one requirement on the list was a sense of community. We wanted a community center, pool and fitness center just like Margaritaville, but located in Maryland. We also wanted no maintenance. I have a vivid picture in my mind of my husband vacuuming up our leaves as they continued to drop from the trees so one of the most important features we wanted was no raking, mowing or snow shoveling.
We also wanted to live near the water or have a view. But what was crucial for us for us was we did not want to have a mortgage. I love to travel and I did not want to be weighed down with a mortgage.
Over the years, my husband have made many good financial decisions that allowed us to retire early with no debt, but the prices of new homes in many over 55+ communities shocked us. After talking to other people in the same situation we found out that the house listed for existing homes was not even the price people were paying. Many of the homes went for above list price and forget about contingency. People wanted cash.
So given our financial resources, we narrowed it down to two communities: Bloomfields in Frederick County and Four Seasons on Kent Island.
On paper, Four Seasons was the winner. It was located right on the water with beautiful views, low taxes and an amazing community center that had already been built. Our heads were saying it was the right place, but we really didn’t like the layouts of the homes and although we did like the condos, the whole place just didn’t feel right for us. And when my husband asked some questions about the community center use, he received a text message from the salesperson saying how busy they were. That response and ensuing conversations did not go over well.
Bloomfields, felt right almost immediately. I remember the day we walked into the model. It was a rancher, which we wanted and had a finished downstairs. My husband walked into the lower level first and even though I was behind him, I heard him say “Mine!” (For the record, he denies saying that so I must have been reading his mind.)
Although we loved the house and community, the taxes in Frederick are crazy. (Yes, Frederick, I am calling you out as many residents have to pay both city and county property taxes.) and there was no water or other other scenic view. Also, we weren’t quite ready to move. I am still working in my hometown and have a commitment to work until the end of the year.
So, we continued our search, but that house was always in the back of our mind. And of course, we decided that we weren’t ready to move.
The search was causing some rather lively conversations between me and my husband so we consulted Jenn Gruber who I interviewed in January 2023. She really helped us become clear on what we wanted and helped us move forward in a less contentious way.
Then Scott told me he received an email from the sales agent David. David had kept in touch with Scott since we first visited Bloomfields. Not in a stalker way, more just an occasional “how are you doing?”
David had invited us to a party for prospective owners and current owners. We decided to take a second look. When we walked in, David knew he had us. We immediately felt at home and enjoyed speaking with all the neighbors.
The house we liked had gone up $30,000 and we knew we would have to act soon before we were priced out of the neighborhood.
I’m not going to tell you it was an easy decision. We had more conversations with Jenn and many more conversations with each other. In addition, we talked about how ensconced we both were in the community and weighed the pros and cons of moving.
Ultimately, we signed on the dotted line.
Even now there are times we wake up and think, “What have we done?” We second guess ourselves and wonder if we made the right decision. But as Scott says, “The train has left the station.”
Also, I keep reminding myself, and Scott, that if it doesn’t work out, we can always move back. Sure we won’t have the same home, but it was too big for us anyway.
Currently, we are right in the middle of selling our house. My next blog will be about the process of selling our house but only after we settle on both houses. In Jewish tradition it’s called a “Kneina Hura” to talk about something before it happens so that blog will have to wait until after we settle.
It’s been a while since I have sat down to write my blog. Who knew that retirement would be so busy?!
What I like best about my “retirement” is the time to do things that I love. For me, that’s traveling!
Our trip to the Acropolis.
This year we ticked off another box on my bucket list.
I have always wanted to go to Greece, but this year it was my husband’s turn to pick our vacation spot. He chose Scandinavia. However the Universe wanted me to go to Greece. We received an email that there was not enough interest in our Scandinavia tour and it had been cancelled.
I called to rebook and said, “How about the Greek Islands?” They said they had a tour, rebooked us and actually refunded part of our money. It cost less for us to go to Greece than to go Scandinavia. Win. Win. For me.
Guided Tours
My husband and I favor guided tours for overseas travel. We have many friends who are comfortable traveling around the world on their own. We are not those people.
My husband and I have very different travel styles. He likes to know what he’s doing every moment. He likes order and wants to know where he is at all times. I don’t mind getting lost. I like wandering and accidentally stumbling onto non-tourist attractions.
So, for the sake of our marriage, we travel with a group.
Choosing the Group
There are many different travel groups out there. Some cater exclusively to individuals over 55 like Road Scholar. My brother his been on a number of these trips and loves them.
Some of the people on our tour had gone on trips with Road Scholar . They indicated that those tours were more scheduled and structured. Of course, perfect for my husband, not so much for me.
Then there are many other groups including Trafalger, Firebird (they called and emailed me excessively when I was just browsing. I didn’t like that.) and others. However, we chose EF GoAhead tours. We have now been on four tours with them: Italy twice, Australia and Greece. Each time you take a trip, they give you credit towards your next trip. It keeps us coming back. (I guess that’s the idea). And while many people on the trips are over 55, the trips are not exclusively for Seniors.
Why Choose Group Travel?
There are many reasons to travel with a tour group. We like that everything is done for you. They pick us up at the airport, take us to our hotel, arrange transportation, book our hotel, buy tickets to the attractions and generally make sure that we see everything we should see.
Our Amazing Group!
In addition, because my husband likes order and structure, he likes to double check the details of everything. He also has lots of questions. It actually drives me a little crazy. So having a tour guide who takes care of everything is the perfect solution.
Our tour guide Pascale Fraissard.
We have had many good tour guides, but in Greece, we had the most amazing tour director we have ever had Pascale Fraissard. Pascale is a French woman who fell in love with Greece while in school and never looked back. She seemed to know everyone in the locations we travelled to and was a cross between a den mother and a drill sergeant.
Another quality Pascale had that made her special was her ability to make a group gel. She created a real camaraderie. We have been with many travel groups and of course some are better than others. This group was amazing! Everyone on the trip was considerate. They showed up on time and helped each other. We actually liked everyone in this group, but that is not always the case.
Sometimes there are one or two people in a group you don’t like, but with a group of 20 people, you will find someone to talk to. Sometimes you can even find life long friends.
The people who travel in these groups are usually pretty interesting and have travelled to many different places all over the world. One of the people in our group said, “In my day-to-day life, when I ask if anyone has been to a specific country, usually no one has travelled there. When I’m in a tour group, there is always someone who has been to the country where I want to travel to and they have great advice about traveling there.”
If you’re not sure whether or not group travel is the right way to travel for you, try taking a short trip somewhere and see what you think.
Flexibility!
One of the reasons we like GoAhead is that the tours have a basic structure. You can see the itinerary, what meals are included and any in tour transportation. For this tour we used ferries to go from island to island and then returned to Athens from Crete by plane.
Then there are additional trips you can add on. Some people don’t like add-ons and think everything should be included. That’s definitely reasonable. However, we like to pick and chose our tours.
For example, we decided to forego two tours because they involved long bus trips. I’m sure they would have been amazing, but after a long plane ride, we weren’t up to it. Instead, we had a free day walking around Athens and a free day walking around Crete. It’s a tough life.
More About Greece
As I said, we have been on four trips with EF Go Ahead tours and have travelled extensively on our own. For us, Greece was the most amazing trip we have ever been on. We went to Athens, Mykonos, Santorini and Crete. Each one was so amazing and unique.
The Caryatids
The history in Athens was incredible and you feel as though you are witnessing the birth of humanity. But of course, Greece is also known for fun and food and food and fun. We went to a “Big Fat Greek” style dinner where we broke plates and drank Ouzo. For some reason my husband was selected to clean up the plates after we broke them all. (I had nothing to do with that.)
Mykonos was gorgeous. Our hotel was on a mountain top overlooking the sea and a black sand beach just a quick shuttle ride away.
It was hard to tear myself away from the beach and the view, but I decided to visit Delos, the birthplace of Apollo (according to legend). Our tour guide made the whole island come alive and as a history major, I was captivated.
Our guide on Delos.
My husband stayed back at our hotel. the Utopia, on Mykonos. He texted me, “I’m not leaving and you can’t make me.” I think he liked the place.
The view from the Utopia Hotel.
But we did leave and went to Santorini. Santorini is the island you see in every marketing shot of Greece. Blue rounded roofs and white painted buildings. Really, just WOW! We took a catamaran ride around the caldera and jumped off into the Aegean Sea. More singing, dancing, swimming, great food and wine.
Santorini
Our last stop was the island of Crete. We toured the ruins of Knossos, where King Minos imprisoned the Minotaur in a labyrinth, according to the myth. To think that a 1,500 room palace was built 3,500 years ago was just awe inspiring.
One of the frescos at the palace.
After a quick trip back to Athens, we had a group goodbye dinner and the next day caught a plane for home.
It was hard to say goodbye to the history, the fun and the food. (You would think with all the spinach pie and wine and greek salad and fish and wine and dessert I had that I would have had to buy an extra seat for the trip home, but I actually only gained one pound.) But we all have to return to real life sometime.
Moving Forward!
So that’s what I did on my summer vacation. That’s why you haven’t heard from me and why I haven’t been writing.
However, in my time off, I have received so many ideas about people I should interview for my blog. I’m excited to start back to writing again. There are so many amazing people in this world, doing incredible things after 50 and I would love to introduce them to you.
If you know someone I should interview, message me or email me at ksparis15@gmail.com.
FYI — I did not receive any compensation from Go Ahead tours or the Greek government for this blog, but if they would like to say thank you, I like wine!
Staying active and healthy is the goal of Janet Jarvis’s senior fitness class.
Janet Jarvis, 75, has been teaching fitness classes at the Y in Catonsville for over 40 years. “When we started, we wore leg warmers and leotards and all the classes were choreographed routines that changed every six weeks,” Janet said.
“Back then it was all about dance, no strength training.”
But since that time, Janet has taught everything from aerobics to spinning and strength training. Janet even held the position as Fitness Coordinator.
However, about fifteen years ago, when the Y’s senior fitness class was left without an instructor, Janet had to find a new instructor. She wasn’t anxious to take it on herself. “I thought, what will I get out of the class?” Janet said.
Although, she was technically a senior at 60 years old, Janet was much more active than the members in the class. (Even during this interview she kept popping up to demonstrate different moves.) But as the fitness coordinator, she had to staff the class and after one instructor didn’t work out, the class asked her to be the new instructor. She agreed to teach the class on one condition: The participants had to face the mirror.
Prior to Janet teaching, the participants had always been sitting in chairs with their backs to the mirrors. She felt it was important that they face the mirror so she could see everyone when she was facing the mirror and so they could see their own form on each move. “It was a safety issue,” Janet said. “When I’m facing the mirror, I have to be able to see them so I can check their posture and form,” Janet said.
In addition, Janet wanted to get them out of the chairs and moving. It wasn’t just because she thought it was a good idea, she had been taking certified senior fitness classes and CEC courses in the field. There had been a change in the philosophy when teaching seniors. The new mantra was, “Seniors can do more.”
The class agreed and Janet began teaching the senior fitness class at the Y in Catonsville. She slowly got them out of the chairs and started making changes to make them stronger and better able to carry out their day to day activities. This is known as functional fitness.
Janet sees her class as not only a way to get her participants stronger, but also to keep them connected to each other.
“We’re concentrating on them just getting here and the social aspects. It’s about establishing a community especially since so many of them live independently,” Janet said.
In addition, during her classes, Janet concentrates on strength training, core, balance and flexibility. “It’s all about core, posture and strength,” Janet said.
“It’s strength training to help them every day doing the laundry and picking things up,” Janet said.
However, it also helps them pursue an active lifestyle. Many of the seniors participate in everything from pickle ball and kayaking to quilting and painting.
She also concentrates on ankle agility and teaching seniors to lift their feet. “Shuffling is going to lead to a fall,” Janet said. “No one thinks about exercising their feet.” However for Janet, exercising the feet and ankles is a priority.
“And balance. Balance is one of the most important things that you can’t see,” she said. Again, Janet empathizes balance to help prevent falls. One part of her balance training is increasing core strength.
She realized that the seniors could benefit from strengthening their entire core to increase overall health and increase balance. “I gradually started working in some of these exercises,” Janet said.
As part of her core training, Janet incorporated the use of exercise balls. “That was a big change.”
On Monday morning, her class of more than 25 Seniors, uses exercise balls in a routine that lasts an hour. She has them lifting the balls, bouncing them, sitting on them for stability and putting them against the wall to perform squats, bicep and tricep exercises. In the background, the music of Fleetwood Mac, Rod Stewart and a few other favorites plays to create a fun fitness experience.
The Y in Catonsville has also added other fitness classes specially designed for seniors including kickboxing and Zumba Gold. “They love Zumba,” Janet said. Having a welcoming environment for seniors is important to Janet and the Y organization.
For the Y in Central Maryland, seniors are an important demographic. Janet said sometimes she is questioned about letting people into her class who have health problems. “I say, if they aren’t here, where will they go,” Janet said. She knows that before they come in they have consulted their doctors so she works with each senior at her/his own level.
After being reluctant at first to take on this class, Janet is now a Senior Fitness Advocate. “I just go to any senior training class I could find for my CECs,” Janet said.
She realizes there is a lot of work still to do. “The biggest disease facing seniors today is ‘the sitting disease’,” Janet said. “We spend too much time sitting.” All this sitting is affecting people’s health of all ages.
For Janet, making her classes fun, interesting and effective is the key. She uses, weights, bands, balls and other equipment to keep her students engaged. And playing games is all part of the fun. But each game has a purpose, keeping her participants mentally and physically fit.
In addition to all the physical benefits, Janet knows its all about the social aspects at well. After class, you’ll often see her participants sitting out in the lobby of the Y in Catonsville drinking coffee and telling stories, before they get ready to go to their next class.
What’s a senior? “Well, what is it for AARP, 50?” Janet said laughing. “So who knows. The older I get, seniors aren’t in their 50s.” The majority of her participants are in their 60s to 80s, but all are welcome.
So what does Janet get out of teaching the senior class. “I love seeing how people progress. What they can do they do. What they can’t do, we modify,” Janet said. “It also keeps me in line too. When I get up in the dead of winter, would I get up if I weren’t teaching? I don’t know. The Y is my second home,” Janet said.
“It’s not a job for me, it’s a calling,” Janet said.
If you want to find out more about the Y in Catonsville and all the fitness opportunities they offer, go to:
If you have a topic you’d like me to cover in my blog, please send me an email to karensparis15@gmail.com.
How can I begin to describe what a wonderful time I had with 13 other women in Costa Rica. I’ll try.
I’ve always valued friendships with other women and strove to maintain them. In fact, I spent my 60th birthday with two friends: one I’ve known since 1st grade and the other since junior high.That’s why, when a friend, who I’ve only known for 30 years, told me she was putting together a retreat in Costa Rica, I said, “yes”! Another friend asked me where we would be staying and what part of Costa Rica we were going to. I said, “I don’t know, but I’m in.”
I’m so glad I said yes.
The Inception
The retreat happened thanks to three amazing women with a vision: Sue Lembeck-Edens, Rachel Mefferd and Judy Kohnen.
Sue and Rachel met each other at Goucher College in Maryland where they were Dance Therapy majors over 30 years ago. Although neither are practicing dance therapists currently, they are still in the health field. Rachel is an acupuncturist who also teaches Nia Dance, while Sue is a massage therapist who also teaches Asian healing practices such as Qigong.
Sue and Rachel connected for a weekend retreat on San Clemente beach in California. They invited a few friends to join them, including Judy, who Rachel met when their daughters were in daycare together.
During that weekend, they shared what helped them get through the pandemic and what they did for self-care. They also talked about what they wanted more of in their lives and decided they wanted more time with other women.
“We wanted more experiences whereas older women, we could spend time together like we used to in our 20s, before our families. We wanted to just laugh a lot, have fun and hang out in a way we typically haven’t given ourselves permission to do in a long time,” said Rachel.
Rachel began looking into retreats where she could be a participant. “They looked really good, but when I tried to picture myself there, there were so many question marks,” Rachel said. “I thought, what if we just do one of our own and invite people we knew.”
Rachel started by asking her close group of women whom she’d taught Nia Dance to for many years. “We had that background as dance buddies,” Rachel said. She thought it was a natural extension to go on retreat together. Judy and Sue reached out to their network of family and friends as well.
“Our stumbling block was finding a location,” Judy said.
They considered several locations, but nothing seemed to fit until Rachel was talking to a friend, who told her about a place in Costa Rica. It sounded like the perfect location.
Her friend told her she was taking a direct flight from California (where she lives) to the Guanacaste Airport in Liberia, Costa Rica. That airport there is small and easy to navigate and most importantly, the AirBnB where she was staying could accommodate 14 people.“Everything that she said was what we have been dreaming about,” Rachel said. Then when she saw the pictures and knew, “Yes, that’s the place.”
The Back Patio
Rachel immediately texted Sue and Judy.
“We ran the numbers to see how many people we would need to make it viable,” Judy said. Then, they decided to set some dates and put it out to see if anyone was interested. They created a flier and sent it out “to our favorite people,” according to Judy. They needed a minimum of 9 people and ended up with 14.
Although many women said they wanted to go, they just couldn’t make the commitment, Judy said.
“Women have to give themselves permission to have time for themselves,” Judy said. “a bunch of my friends just wouldn’t give themselves permission. I get it. For years I haven’t given myself permission to do stuff too.” However, she also understood that some people had other commitments. “It’s also where you are in your life,” Judy said. She asked some friends and family members, but they had younger kids and were not able to go.
For Sue, it wasn’t really just about getting away for a vacation, she said it was about connection. “Being here in Central Pennsylvania, there isn’t a lot of opportunity to connect with my peer group. So, the idea of building it and they will come was really important to me,” Sue said. “I don’t really have a group with those similar interests, so I really have to extend myself. Now that my kids are older, I have time and desire to build those connections.”
Judy and Rachel thought about including their husbands in the trip either before or after the retreat, but it just became too complicated logistically because there wasn’t enough buy-in from the husbands to see if it would be feasible to extend our stay, according to Rachel.
The group also talked about having a mother-daughter retreat, so they combined their ideas and asked their daughters to come along with them. The girls came along with the group.
“Having the girls there was a really beautiful added experience,” Rachel said. “I think it added a depth of women. We had women aged 20 into their 70s,” Sue said. “Everyone embraced one another regardless of age.”
“The thing that I was struck with the young ones,” Judy said, “was their confidence. ‘Costa Rica, no problem!”
She added, “I think the girls enjoyed seeing their moms interacting with their friends and running this retreat. I think they had a lot of pride in us.”
Logistics
Sue, Rachel and Judy took the divide and conquer approach to planning the retreat.
Rachel found the AirBnB. “That was the inciting incident of the story,” Judy said.
Then Judy became the numbers person. She determined what the costs would be and how much each person needed to pay and collected the money. Judy was also responsible for working to arrange meals. The leaders had decided to have a majority of the meals catered and Judy arranged the menus. The expenses worked out to be about $200 a day according to Judy. The group leaders wanted to keep the trip at a modest price point, but they understood that for some people that price was still too high.
Sue was responsible for arranging the trips such as kayaking, snorkeling and visiting a Macaw Reserve. Although Judy did much of the research, Sue handled working with the local adventure tour group and actually booking the trips.
Me and my pal Shari
The plan was to integrate a half-day tour into each day’s schedule. They created their programming around the tours such as “Birds of a Feather” was the theme the day the group went to the Macaw Reserve.
Sue worked to accommodate everyone’s wishes, but it was challenging at times to make everyone happy. If people wanted a different tour than the ones that were offered, Sue put them in touch with her tour company.
“At every step of the way there were challenges. I have to say right up until a couple days before we got on the plane there were challenges,” Sue said. “If I had to do it again, in retrospect, I would probably have a cut-off date and said ‘all done’.”
The Macaw Reserve
Rachel served as back up to Sue and served as the project manager. Her skills with “WhatsApp” also came in handy when communicating with the tour company.
Judy said, “You also have to understand that Costa Rica is not an immediate culture. I was asking about food and the menu and the guy said ‘oh yeah, don’t worry’,” Judy said. Only two weeks before the trip did Judy have more concrete plans regarding the food.
Vacation or Retreat
For Sue, Judy and Rachel, the trip was not just about planning a vacation with girlfriends, it was about getting more of what they talked about in San Clemente. Each one brought their talents to the table and set up programming for every day.
“The initial vision for the retreat was the programming. The tours were just secondary because we were in Costa Rica,” Rachel said. “But primarily we want to offer a creative arts retreat where we could dance, write, learn some Asian healing arts and share what we love to do in a community.
Each day there was a theme, for example, one of them was “Sunrise, Sunset” to correspond with the Sunset Boat Tour. “Then we would circle back to our programming and we would create images and writing to correspond with that theme,” Rachel said.
Judy was responsible for creating writing prompts and led the portion of the program on journal writing. For “Sunrise, Sunset”, Judy prompted people to write about different phases of their lives. Her interest in writing began when her kids grew up and left home. “I knew I needed a well-developed interest,” Judy said. “I didn’t know what to be like ‘It’s the end of the world,’ when my kids moved out.” She’s been writing workshops for over 10 years and was excited to share her interest with the group.
Sue led the Asian healing arts program from Yoga to Tai Chi to Qigong. Each class was different and focused on relaxation and getting in touch with the participants’ inner thoughts. Over the years she has built her career on her passion for Dance Therapy. “Everything is related to movement and body. Whether it’s energy within and around the body,””What I shared (during the retreat) I cultivated in a class I’ve been teaching for about 10 years now called ‘Meditation Through the Seasons’,” Sue said. ”That’s the movement I have embraced through the years.”
Qigong on the Beach.
Rachel led the group in a wide variety of dance routines. Each had a different message and a mixture of upbeat music and rhythmic moves. “The communities of women started through dance, so of course we were going to dance and do other healing arts. We did improvised dances that were related to the tours.”
Although they had everything planned, Judy said they built in flexibility. “We wanted to be able to make changes based on the mood of the group,” Judy said. “I had different writing backups to try to match up with people’s moods of the day.”
But what wasn’t flexible was the time. “The writing portion was for a very fixed time,” Judy said. Each section had a set amount of time that the leaders stayed within. “I think we worked really well together,” Judy said.
In the evenings, the leaders invited other members of the group to share and present their passions. It was a great opportunity for the group members to learn more about each other and their individual artistic endeavors.
One of the greatest challenges was the weather. “It was really, really hot and people were not that interested in working up a big sweat,” Rachel said. Luckily, the AirBnB has a pool outside that the group used to keep things cool. Dance routines were often followed by a dip in the pool and some routines were even moved into the pool.
Looking Back
I spoke with the women a few weeks after the retreat to see what they thought of the week.
“I thought it was fantastic,” Sue said. “I had a great time.”
“I really enjoyed my part,” Judy said. “At first people were reluctant to get up early (6:30 a.m.) for the Early Pages writing, but with the sun coming up early and going down early it made early birds out of night owls. People really started showing up to the writing and people really shared.” “I loved spending time with my daughter. I loved having time with the women. I loved the body movement part being able to move all day,” Judy said. However, she admitted that the woman’s energy could be a little overwhelming at times. “I was really surprised by that.”
The Last Night in Costa Rica
“It really met all my expectations and my vision,” Rachel said. “I fell in love with Costa Rica and would really like to go back and explore more of it.”
“I feel we got so much of it right. It felt so good in that way. Sharing dance with everyone and seeing their smiling faces has stayed with me,” Rachel said.
One of the changes they would make would be to have clearer intentions. “We kept saying to people that this was a hybrid model of a retreat. Some of it is structured and some of it is you,” Rachel said. Not everyone understood that. People understood the structure, but they were reluctant to venture out on their own according to the group leaders.
If they decided to plan another retreat, they might hold it in the U.S. “Having it in Costa Rica we were taking in a lot of unknowns. So, we might do something in the states where we would have a little more control.
But as far as the programming, I wouldn’t have changed a thing,” Sue said.
Judy said they might also have a smaller group.
“I have to say it was a lot of fun. It was a lot of work too. I loved all the planning,” Rachel added with a laugh. “It was pretty ballsy to do it.”
The leaders final moment together.
For Judy the only downside was when there were glitches during the retreat. “It was a stressor when things go wrong on your watch,” Judy said. But she said when that happened, they had each other to lean on.
“I have to say we had each other’s backs” Sue said, ”in the planning and the facilitating.” “And we knew how to pull out the best in each other as things came up,” Sue said.
And of course, having co leaders allowed them to vent!
“I have nothing but a deep bow to Judy for all of her details and cool-headed numbers. And for Sue keeping everything in emotional balance and to ground everyone. I felt so comfortable co-leading with them,” Rachel said.
“This is the perfect time in our lives to go on a trip like this,” said Judy.
If you know someone I should interview for this blog, email me at ksparis15@gmail.com.
Stan has a true passion for life. He has a passion for his work. A passion for the Jewish faith and its history and a passion for his family and the love of his life, Carolyn, to whom he’s been married for over 60 years.
Stan has a true passion for life. He has a passion for his work. A passion for the Jewish faith and its history and a passion for his family and the love of his life, Carolyn, to whom he’s been married for over 60 years.
Stan and Carolyn Lembeck
Stan retired at 66. “I’m not really sure why I retired. I didn’t have to. I had the idea that turning 65 is when people are supposed to retire. So, I hung on an extra year,” Stan said.
Twenty two years later, he’s still working, but now he is doing it on his own schedule.
“It was a great joy going to work,” Stan said. He was a Cooperative Extension Specialist in Community Planning for the Department of Agricultural Economics and Rural Sociology. He explained it as “basically giving away knowledge to the community, the mission of all Land Grant colleges in the United States.”
Now, he puts that knowledge to work at the Planning Education Institute, which he helped establish while he was working at Penn State. The Institute focuses on teaching community planning and land use to local elected and appointed officials and attorneys. It serves 1,000 students a year.
“I like it because it keeps me involved and keeps me relevant. I did not give up my career when I retired,” Stan said.
He now works as much as he wants to. “Carolyn (his wife) thinks I spend 10 hours a day working. I don’t. But if she wants to live with that fiction, that’s ok,” Stan said.
Finding a Place to Belong
Stan and Carolyn also spend their retirement supporting and maintaining the Agudath Achim synagogue in Huntingdon, PA.
Stan and Carolyn became involved with the synagogue after seeing an advertisement in the late 1990s. “Frankly, we did not have a place where we felt comfortable in terms of our religious activities,” Stan said.
They decided, along with another couple, to drive the 31 miles to Huntingdon to celebrate the High Holiday days.
Celebrating Shavuoth at the synagogue,
Their first impression? “Frankly, we were captivated. The people were warm, they were friendly. It was very welcoming. We joined up,” Stan said.
The synagogue was led by the members. Only three times in its history did it have a rabbi. “It was a very home-grown operation,” Stan said. It was very different from the more traditional background that he had grown up in, but he and Carolyn knew that they had found a home.
But like many religious institutions, the number of members was dwindling. As the original members and the next generation of the original members grew older, moved on, or passed away, Stan and Carolyn became more central to the operation. “It would have been easy to just end, but we felt there was a need to continue it,” Stan said.
Because the members owned the building and it was lay-led, the cost to continue to operate was manageable. However, some members began to wonder if it might make more sense to close down the synagogue and move the congregation to Altoona. One of the original members, Bernie Schwartz, said no. “We aligned with him,” Stan said.
Bernie was a local merchant who had a jewelry store and a musical instrument store in Huntingdon. “It was part of his tradition and he wanted to continue it,” Stan said.
Keeping the Doors Open
Stan and Carolyn became more involved in the running of the synagogue. Stan participated in the services and Carolyn handled the hospitality. Stan eventually became president of the synagogue board.
There was a couple who led the services and people enjoyed them, according to Stan. “It was loosey, goosey conservative. It wasn’t extreme in any fashion; however it built on traditions. It was easy to be part of the congregation,” Stan said.
Carolyn likes to talk about the phenomenon of people finding Agudath Achim. It has not only been a resource for the Jewish community, but the greater Huntingdon area as well.
She told a story about a foreign exchange student from Hungary, Sophia. She was attending Juniata College in Huntingdon. Growing up in Hungary, she was not allowed to practice her religion. The congregation took her in. When she completed her college years, she accepted a job at the local newspaper. There she met the son of the owner, fell in love, and married him. The congregation gave her a Bridal Shower, and to show her appreciation, she created bookmarks in English and Hungarian for the members.
There is a small cemetery close to the synagogue and they receive requests from the community to be buried there.
Saving the Synagogue
Agudath Achim was built between 1930 and 1934 and served the community well. “However, after all those years, it was showing its wear,” Stan said. He had already seen one synagogue deteriorate to the point where it had to be demolished, the Hillel Building at Penn State, where he would sometimes go for High Holidays. “The one thing I felt strongly about is I didn’t want to see that happen to this building,” Stan said.
Inside Agudath Achim.
“I was influential in making the decision to invest in the building, not allow it to deteriorate. In 2012, we redid the interior of the sanctuary. It looks gorgeous. There are replacement chandeliers, walls painted, what have you.” Two years ago, there was work done on the outside of the building such as brick work and other minor repairs.
“There was money in the bank. A small endowment and some CD funds,” Stan said which was used for the interior. For the exterior work, Stan instituted a campaign to buy a brick. “Buy a brick for 18 cents.” The number 18 is considered sacred in Hebrew because it is the same word as “life.” When you wish someone “l’chaim,” you are wishing them “long life.”
The outside of Agudath Achim
The building was so important to him because of his religious sense. “It comes from a sense that it is your responsibility as a Jew to maintain the synagogue. You don’t allow a religious building to just fall apart,” Stan said.
Many of Stan and Carolyn’s grandchildren have since their bar mitzvahs and bat mitzvahs at the synagogue.
The Synagogue as Tradition
To Carolyn and Stan, saving the Huntingdon Synagogue was not just about saving one building.
“You can think of the Huntingdon synagogue by itself, but Carolyn and I think about the regional context,” Stan said. There are synagogues in small towns throughout Pennsylvania. “They are individual religious institutions with no concept of how they fit into the larger context of Judaism and Jewish practice in Central Pennsylvania when it was the hinterlands. ” Through their research, Carolyn and Stan found out that many synagogues were started by traveling peddlers. who decided they wanted to put down roots and form a community. “This is the way that congregations formed,” Stan said.
“That’s what motivated us.”
Now there is a national Jewish Community Legacy Project which is bringing these individual congregations together by Zoom to learn more about how these communities developed in small rural towns throughout the country.
“I see it as not just the legacy of my grandchildren, but the legacy of development of Jewish practice in the wilderness. What are Jews doing there and how did they get there?” Stan said. “We finally have some greater sense of the regional context and that is what drives us,” Stan said.
Agudath Achim Now
Currently, there are a small number of families that are members; however, the congregation continues. There are monthly Zoom meetings and the congregation holds high holiday services. “We continue to offer services. It’s a minimal amount, but it continues the practice and people enjoy it,” Stan said.
One of the challenges to people attending services is the synagogue’s distance from State College., “It’s a forty-five minute drive from State College where many of the potential participants live. The distance dissuades people from coming.” However, Stan believes that the drive is part of the whole experience. “The drive down is preparation for the service. The sense of nature and God is part of the service. To me it’s part of the experience. It’s part of the joy. It’s not a schlep.”
Final Thought
Stan Lembeck’s advice to anyone thinking about retirement is “KEEP BUSY”. Stan and Carolyn are doing just that, but they are also giving back to the community. Between Stan’s work at the Institute and his and Carolyn’s work with the synagogue they are looking at not only their own futures, but also, the future of Central Pennsylvania and the tradition of Judaism in rural Pennsylvania.
Susan Cislak McNulty was a little reluctant to enter the dating pool after the death of her husband, but love found her in a chance encounter.
Susan Cislak McNulty was too young to be a widow, but there she was at 54. Her husband Mark passed away in 2016 from renal cancer. They had been married for 19 years.
Susan was not only dealing with the emotional loss, but all the finances and paperwork related to his death. During this time she received some advice, “You’re only 54, don’t get married until you’re 60 or you will lose his benefits.” At that point, getting remarried as not even on Susan’s mind.
Instead, she kept herself busy.
Before Mark’s death, she had been working part-time at the University of Richmond, but after his death she took a full-time job as an admin in the Department of Alumni and Career Services.
She also became more involved with her church, First Presbyterian. She became a deacon of the church in 2017 as well as the head of the bereavement committee. Unfortunately, Susan had become very familiar with loss. After Mark died, her mother passed in 2017 and her father in 2019. In addition, she had lost a brother much earlier in 2012.
Susan was head of the committee for two years, but realized she was ready to try something different. She told the minister, “I really don’t want to be labeled as a widow, I just want to be Susan.” Susan said. “I just had to move on.”
So, she made the change and became head of the Youth Council working with the kids and their parents. The parents were closer to Susan’s age and she enjoyed the transition.
In addition, Susan was involved as an advisor for her sorority Delta Gamma at the University of Richmond.
Susan had a full life between work, activities and her Cavalier King Charles Spaniels — George and Sophie.
Even though Susan’s life was full, she knew something was missing, “The house is awfully quiet,” Susan said. She also missed traveling and sharing the experience with a significant other.
Susan’s co-workers at the College tried to get her to put together an online dating profile, but she wasn’t ready. Another colleague told them, “Susan will get you when she’s ready.”
Susan had started flirting a little, but nothing came of it.
A Chance Encounter
Susan was considering creating a profile when she received an invitation to one of Mark’s family member’s wedding. Her sister-in-law called to personally ask her to come. “She said you would be the only person there representing the siblings (Mark was one of four children),” Susan said. So, she decided to take the trip down to Savannah.
Susan was enjoying her time in Savannah and reconnecting with family members she hadn’t seen since Mark’s funeral. She had brought with her several family heirlooms for the groom and presented them at the rehearsal dinner that night. While she was doing so, Joe walked by. He stopped to listen to the history of the items that Susan was telling the couple. After that, she and Joe began to talk.
Susan said she felt comfortable talking to Joe because she was surrounded by family. She thought, “He’s kind if cute, maybe I’ll sit next to him tomorrow at the wedding.”
The wedding and the reception were all at one location and indeed she did sit next him thanks to some maneuvering by her sister-in-law.
Susan found out that Joe was an old family friend. He and her brother-in-law had been fraternity brother’s at Susan’s alma mater, DePauw University.
After a night of talking and dancing, Susan knew there was something special about him. They made plans to go on the on a trolley tour together around the city the next day. Before the night ended, he gave her a kiss. Her niece said, “He kissed you.” Susan said, “I know.”
Susan had recently turned 60.
On the trolley ride, Joe asked her out for lunch. Her sister-in-law said, “You should definitely go, he’s such a gentleman.” Afterwards, they took a walk around Savannah. They had been together for 8 hours and then went out with the group to watch basketball.
Before they left Savannah, Susan invited him to visit her in Richmond before. He called her that day to make sure she had arrived home ok and then on Tuesday of the next week, he sent her a bouquet of roses. Three weeks later her came for a visit.
The Courtship
Joe came down to Richmond for a visit and then Susan returned to Indianapolis for a visit and to see the Indianapolis 500.
On his next visit Richmond, June 19th, he pulled a light up ring out of his suitcase and proposed! Because another family member had used it before, he told Susan, “It’s a family heirloom.” Susan said, “Really! Yes, I will.”
Because Joe’s work allowed him to work from anywhere, there was no problem for him moving to Richmond, except that he had lived his entire life in Indianapolis. His house sold in one day and he was ready to make the transition. Joe has never been married before. He told Susan he grew up at 64.
But their fairytale was not without a few bumps. On one of Joe’s visits, he brought his dog. They thought the three dogs would be ok together, but Joe’s dog attacked and killed Susan’s dog George. Susan found her dog under the piano when she returned home. When Susan called Joe about the attack he said, “Do you still want to marry me?” The answer was yes.
So Sophie is a single dog.
Joe had lived his whole life in Indiana where Susan grew up. The more they talked, the more they realize how many connections in common. It was surprising they had never met before.
Married Life
They said I do on 11/22/22. “It was a Tuesday,” Susan said.
Joe wanted a big wedding. He wanted five groomsmen. “I said, ok, it’s your first marriage, so I guess I have to find 5 bridesmaids,” Susan said.
How is married life? Susan said she realized that he treats her the same way her father treated her mother. He is very attentive, but she warns him,”You can’t put me on a pedestal.” But he says, “But I love you.
That is not to say that they never disagree. Susan admits, she does have a temper. But Joe said she has an Irish temper. “You’re quick to flash, but you’re quick to forgive.”
Mark’s family has been very supportive of Susan’s marriage to Joe. Before Mark passed, he made her promise that she would at least date. “He didn’t want me to be the mournful widow,” Susan said.
“Before he died, he said he would be ok if I remarried.”
Final Advice
Susan said she is glad she made the decision to date again. “You just have to put yourself out there,” she said.
“It’s nice opening the door and knowing someone is there,” Susan said. She added, “I love cooking for someone and he likes my cooking.”
Joe told Susan the best part of being married is falling sleep next to her and waking up and she is there. He said he wants to be the husband she has the longest time. She replied “Then you have to live 20 years. ” He said he was ok with that.
There’s planning a custom planned honeymoon in Ireland this summer.
“I think it is a match made in heaven for us,” Susan said.
When she was traveling back from Savannah, her engagement ring broke. Her friend said, “That’s Mark telling you it’s ok.
As a token of her love for these two men, they designed an engagement ring with Mark’s diamond in the middle and a new setting with additional diamonds.
A friend at church said, “You have the loves of your life on one hand.”
I’m back and ready to write some more stories about amazing people.
One thing I have learned since starting my blog, Growing Up Not Old, is that life over 50 looks very different to different people.
When I decided to retire from my job of 15 years, I told people that I was calling this phase of my life, my “re-imagination” not my retirement. So I have spent the past six months figuring out what to do next. Reimagining my life.
Since I left my full-time job, I have woken up every morning euphoric. I have never looked back or second guessed my decision. But after six months of writing, creating videos and doing a podcast, I wanted a little more structure in my life.
An opportunity presented itself at the local Chamber of Commerce. I had already being doing some work for them as a contractor so, I took on the position of part-time Community Events Coordinator. So far its been great.
I started working there after a two-week stay with my daughter and her husband in their home in Auckland, New Zealand. It was awesome! And for a long time fan of the Lord of the Rings franchise, it was really a dream come true visiting Hobbiton, the set of the Hobbit movies.
So now that I have recovered from my trip and have settled into my new job, it’s time to get back to my passion — writing.
As many of you know, I spent last year preparing for my own re-imagination by interviewing people who had made big changes to their life after 50. I have told stories of people selling everything and moving to the Caribbean and other stories of people falling in love later in life. Each story is unique and inspiring.
Now, I am writing my own story in real time, so please forgive my lapses between blogs as I figure out what life looks like for me personally.
Still, I have received so many comments about my blog and so many people have told me how much they like reading my stories, that I’m not about to give up now.
So, now that I am in motion, I am ready to get back to writing. I have already contacted a few people about interviews and I am always looking for someone else with an interesting story.
I know my part-time job with the Chamber is not my-end-all-be-all. It’s one more step on my journey. I hope I never stop taking those steps because I believe one should never stop learning.
So, follow me this year as we meet more interesting people with their own unique stories and help me as I navigate my own path.
My next blog will be March 14th. I am going to catch up with some of the people I profiled last year to see how they are doing and then March 28th, I will have a brand new blog.
If you haven’t been following my blog, now is a great time to start. Go back and read some of my early stories. The writing may not have been as on point, but the stories are just as fascinating.
Here’s to another trip around the Sun and more interesting people to meet.
If you know someone who would make a great interview, let me know. Email me at karensparis@gmail.com.
When Jenn turned 50, she knew she was ready for a change. After some self-reflection, she found her next career helping others like her going through transition.
January is often a time when people reflect and think about what they want to do over the next year. Some people over 50 may start to think about retiring, while others start to think about what their next chapter might be.
Five years ago, when Jenn Gruber was turning 50, she began to think about what she might do next. Her husband was getting ready to retire and her daughter was graduating from high school and going off to college.
“I’d spent 22 years putting my family first,” Jenn said. “I wanted to do what I wanted to do, but I had no idea what that was.”
She knew she wanted to do something that would incorporate all the skills she had learned over a lifetime of volunteer and paid work experience with non-profits. Over the years, she discovered that not only did she love leading groups, public speaking and writing, she was good at it.
So, Jenn began a journey of self-discovery including meditation, yoga, journaling, and listening to podcasts, watching TED talks, and reading self-help books and articles.
“All of that led me to coaching,” Jenn said. “Helping people find more joy and more fulfillment in their lives felt very appealing to me and brought me back to what I wanted to do in my 20s.”
Although she was passionate about coaching, Jenn was still hesitant to take the first steps.
“I thought, ‘what if I’m not good at it?” Jenn said. However, once she started the certification process, she knew that coaching was the modality that she had been looking for. “I realized that through every job and position I’d held, I did a lot of coaching,” Jenn said. “I was always the person that the company leadership would ask, ‘What’s the mood of the organization? What do people need?’” Her training provided a framework for using the skills that had always felt intuitive to her.
Jenn and her family
Once she had decided move forward, Jenn had another decision to make, who would she coach? “I thought it made sense to work with women like me,” Jenn said. She wanted to help women who were ready to start a new chapter but had lost touch with who they were, but that felt too broad.
“I’ve always loved helping people to feel more connected to one another, so I realized that I wanted relationships to be a part of my work. What I landed on was family transitions.” Jenn said.
Now, she helps people who are approaching retirement to not only explore their own goals, but also to think about how their relationships are going to be impacted by those changes. Her clients also include individuals whose partners are retiring, those whose kids are becoming young adults, and those whose parents are aging and declining.
Her own personal experience with her father, who was afflicted with Alzheimer’s, has helped give her insight into this area.
Training and Certification
Jenn went through extensive training to become a life coach. She first attended a 9-month program through the Institute for Professional Excellence in Coaching (iPEC) and earned her Certified Professional Coach (CPC) designation. Then, after completing 100 hours of coaching and additional testing, she was awarded the title of Associate Certified Coach (ACC) through the International Coaching Federation.
Going into Business
In February 2020, Jenn launched her business. Although at first, this seemed an inopportune time to begin a business, Jenn found new opportunities.
“My entire marketing plan for the year went out the window.” Jenn said with a laugh. Instead, she pivoted and began facilitating virtual support groups and coaching clients struggling with COVID-related issues.
Jenn worked with SHIFT Yoga in Fulton, MD facilitating online “Support for the Soul” groups. In addition, Jenn led discussions for book clubs and groups of friends who pulled together, helping them deal with COVID-related issues.
Clients would say, “I’m not used to being with my spouse 24-7 and it’s driving me crazy.” But it wasn’t just about managing family relationships, people had many fears about COVID, and it caused them to re-think their lives moving forward, according to Jenn.
“It was a great way for me to get a lot of exposure,” Jenn said. During this time, she was able to make contacts and get her name out in the community, while also gaining more experience.
Building Her Business
Jenn also made a point to network. She joined the Business Women’s Network of Howard County. “Even though it was all virtual for quite a while, I made a lot of contacts,” Jenn said.
“I’ve also gotten a lot of referrals through other coaches,” she said. Because each coach has their own specialty, Jenn has had other coaches reach out to her. Sometimes the referrals come through the Facebook groups she belongs to and other times through iPEC alumni. “There aren’t a lot of coaches who do what I do,” Jenn said, referring in particular to the fact that she works with peoplewho are overwhelmed by their parents’ increasing needs.
Jenn has also built up a network of professionals who refer clients to her. “After the pandemic I put a lot of energy into referral partnerships,” Jenn said. These professionals include social workers, senior real estate specialists, estate attorneys and generic care managers.
Advice for People in Transition
Through her experience working with people transitioning into retirement, as well as her own personal experience, Jenn has found one thing that’s really important. She recommends you ask yourself, “What do I want my life to look like once I retire?”
Jenn and Jim on vacation
Jenn said this is not about just planning out the big goals. She recommends you think about what day-to-day life will be. What time will you get up or go to bed? Do you want to set an alarm? Will you go to gym? Do you want to volunteer?
“Think about how you’re going to fill your days,” Jenn said. She also recommended asking yourself why you’re choosing to do those things, whether it be activities or down time. “What is going to bring you joy and fulfillment?”
Discover What’s Missing
Jenn said that when people first make the decision to retire, they often think about what they won’t miss after leaving their job. For example, “I won’t have to deal with difficult people anymore. “
However, she said it’s important to take that next step and think about what their former career provided them. According to Jenn, failure to look at the loss you may be experiencing as a result of retiring may leave a person floundering and feeling like “this is what I wanted, why am I not enjoying it more?”
For example, an individual may miss something like the social interactions at work. They need to think, “‘I do miss the social interactions so, I need to find new social interactions.’ It’s not that leaving was the wrong decision,” she said.
“People often don’t realize or anticipate how much the loss of their previous life will impact them,” Jenn said. “Then they start judging themselves for not handling things well.”
According to Jenn it’s important acknowledge what you are missing and where else can you find that feeling. “It’s not working every day that you miss, it’s the feelings that come from working every day that you miss,” Jenn said. Perhaps it’s the sense of accomplishment, or feeling appreciated, or being a part of a team.
She recommends that individuals remember why they made the decision to retire and think about what they are gaining in retirement.
“What is it that made you feel relevant before? What does relevance mean to you?” are questions that Jenn says can be great starting points.
Her Personal Transition
Jenn doesn’t just focus on an individual, but also on how the relationships in her clients’ lives will change as a result of major life changes. She knows first-hand. Her husband, Jim, retired December 30th, 2021. “It wasn’t a seamless transition for the two of us, even though he had been working from home for over a year.” Jenn said.
Jenn and her husband Jim
It’s was a transition for Jim going from being on a schedule to having no schedule, especially since she was still on a schedule. They made changes to the way they communicated in order to navigate this transition better.
Now, they talk in the morning over coffee. They both share what they are going to do that day. Jenn goes over her schedule so her husband knows when she is working and when she has time off. That way he knows when she’s available.
Jenn said this not only helps him, but it helps her as well. “I’ve worked from home in the past, and I’ve had trouble maintaining boundaries between work life and home life. By telling him my schedule, it helps me stick to those hours,” Jenn said.
In addition, they set up weekly conversations, where they discuss plans for the weekend and logistical details of their lives. It’s also an opportunity to talk about things that are bothering them. “It’s a safe time to have honest conversations. We started it during COVID,” Jenn said.
At first, Jim was reluctant. “So, you want me to set an hour aside each week so you can tell be everything I’m doing wrong.” Jim said.
“I explained, ‘No. We deserve to have the best in each other, and we’re not getting that.’ Now he admits that he sees the benefit. It’s a time to share whatever is on our minds,” Jenn said.
It is a time to discuss issues without the emotions that are present in the heat of the moment. They are able to me more receptive and less reactive and defensive. These meetings seem to work, according to Jenn.
The Second Spouse Retiring
Retirement is one change people make; however, when the second spouse retires, it is an entirely new transition.
Jenn said it’s important to keep in mind that each spouse may have their own perception of what retirement should look like. “There is no one perfect way to do retirement. Couple’s retirement goals can be very different from one another,” Jenn said. One person may be a homebody who thrives on down time versus another person who wants a full schedule and a lot of activity.
“No answer is the right one for everyone,” Each person needs to determine what does their ideal retirement looks like and where the crossover with their partner is, according to Jenn.
“Often one person wants to spend more time together than the other one does. There needs to be compromise and it takes time,” Jenn said.
“Start with what sounds fun and appealing to both individuals. Start there,” Jenn said.
Life as a Coach
Jenn works about 20 hours a week and feels she has found the right path. “I love helping people see things in a different way — helping them to see things they didn’t see before,” Jenn said. “With coaching there are no right or wrong answers. It’s all about helping people find the solution that is best for them.”
Jenn believes that people have the answer, and her job is to help them get to it. “They do know what they want, they just don’t know how to access it. Helping them figure it out is really fun for me and very rewarding.”
She believes her work has a ripple effect. “If a client feels happier as a result of our work together, that ripples out to everyone they touch. I like knowing I’ve impacted the world in a positive way.”
“So much time is wasted when people don’t understand each other,” Jenn said. “And a lot of that comes from them not knowing themselves, and what they want and need. When you look inward and figure that out, it’s going to improve all your other relationships as well,” Jenn said.
Final Advice
Jenn said the biggest hurdle in retiring is indecision. People often are unsure of when they want to retire and end up second guessing themselves.
“What’s really difficult is when somebody makes a decision and then they don’t feel good about it or question whether they’ve made the right choice,” Jenn said.
“You have to be really clear on why you’re making the decision to retire, then, regardless of what happens in the future, you can still feel good about basing the decision on very valid reasons,” she said.
If you are interested in finding out more about Jenn and the services she offers, go to: https://jenngruber.com/
If you know anyone who you think would be a great interview for my blog, email me at: karensparis@gmail.com
When Randy May turned 50, he took a job in South Africa that has lead to a life of fulfillment, change, adventure and love.
Randy May never took the typical path. Early on in his social work career he realized that he enjoyed working closely with a team of people in mission-driven community organizations. In 2008, that desire took him to accepting a job as Deputy Country Director in Ethiopia working with an international HIV organization. He did well, and was later promoted and moved to South Africa. In 2012, he celebrated his 50th birthday by driving up to Kruger National Park with a colleague to enjoy the vast natural beauty of game park and the wildlife. “It was a lovely day.”
In 2014, Randy met his now husband, Walter. “It was such a surprise. I was 52 and wasn’t looking for love or a partner,” Randy said. “I was just living my life the way I wanted to. I was privileged to run into a really sweet guy.” They were married in May 2018.
Everything seemed to be going well, but in March of that year, Randy was called into a global meeting of the organization and informed that the organization had lost much of its funding due to a change in administration and was cutting the US-base funded positions. “It made perfect sense,” Randy said. The organization wanted to prioritize keeping the field offices open so many of the management and administrative positions were eliminated, Randy explained.
Although Randy had a spousal Visa, he did not have a work permit. “Like many places, you need a work permit to get a job, but you need a job to get a work permit.”
Randy tried for a year to get a job there. “I tried, but being 56, I needed a salary in US Dollars so I could contribute to my Social Security and 401K after a career as a social worker.”
He and Walter had the difficult conversation and concluded that Randy needed to go back to the United States at get a job. “I think that if we were much younger, it would have been really hard. But being at the finish line of work, it is time limited. I mean it’s still hard, but if it was open-ended, it would be even harder.” He returned to the U.S. in October 2019.
Walter needed to stay in South Africa to finish out his career. He had 26 years working for a bank and only a short time until he could retire. “Everyone retires at 60 there,” Randy said. Walter would work until 60 and then have a pension for the rest of his life.
So, in October 2018, Randy moved back to the U.S. He had been in Africa for over 11 years. “Everything I had here was in storage,” Randy said.
He moved back to Maine where he had friends and lived for 23 years before moving to Africa. “I applied for a job to work at the LL Bean call center during the Christmas season like every good Mainers does and I had done for two seasons in the past.” When not working, he volunteered at a local soup kitchen.
Luckily, by the end of December 2018, Randy was hired as the interim deputy director of a small, non-profit, supporting health systems in Haiti. “It was doing work that I love,” said Randy.
With his new job in place, Randy scheduled a quick trip to see Walter in South Africa. Then in February, he visited Cap-Haitien, Haiti for three-weeks to see first-hand how his work was affecting the residents of Haiti and to learn more about the organization.
“The organization I was working for was supporting local clinics and hospitals,” Randy said. His job was to help them get training and equipment so the residents could get quality health care. “It was lovely. The people were very friendly,” Randy said.
Then COVID hit and Randy wasn’t able to go back to South Africa to see Walter. “It was hell. Thank goodness for Facetime and WhatsApp, but it wasn’t what we had bargained for,” Randy said.
“It was pretty intense, but we were confident in us,” Randy said. He said he is grateful that he didn’t lose any family members to COVID. “In perspective, we were inconvenienced,” Randy said.
Randy enjoyed his job in Maine, but knew it was an interim job. He also felt he needed to move closer to his mother in Indiana.
“I knew my mother was failing and wouldn’t be able to live independently,” Randy said. He began looking for jobs in Indianapolis so he could support his mother and his sister, who had to bear most of the responsibility of taking care of his mother.
He got a job with the Marion County health department doing HIV work. “I’d run away from Indiana in 1984 and never looked back,” Randy said. However, moving back proved to be a good experience.
He enjoyed his time in Indiana and enjoyed reconnecting with friends. “I enjoyed the work and planned to stay there working the five-year plan until our retirement,” Randy said. “I met a lot of great people there.”
Then, one day, somebody “pinged” him and said he should look at a job in Washington D.C. The job was as the Director for HIV and Harm Reduction working with NACCHO, National Association of County and City Health Officials supporting over 3,000 health departments around the country. His job would be focused on making sure people living with HIV and those at risk received the health care they needed. The job also included securing health care for those with viral hepatitis.
“It’s clearly focused on health equity. It’s a little farther removed from what I was doing in Indiana,” Randy said. However, Randy knew that he wanted to apply and he got the job.
“It’s humbling to be this farm kid from Indiana sitting in meeting in Washington D.C. where major decisions are being made,” Randy said.
“I am able to speak to the needs of local health departments,” Randy said. “It’s good work.”
Securing Employment After 50
Although, Randy admits that there is age discrimination, he credits the ability to get jobs after 50 is how he presents himself.
“I talk about what I do know, but I am open to new leadership and new ideas,” Randy said. “I think that openness helps.”
Randy also said he likes to do informational interviews. “I have to pay my bills, so I address that whether it’s working at LL Bean or whatever, but I also talk to people and say, ‘This is the type of work I want to do. Who in your community is doing this type of work?”
Randy said he does information interviews even before he is looking for a job. “It’s just old social networking,” Randy said. He said he uses LinkedIn and his contacts to find out who he should be talking to. “I really appreciate LinkedIn. I’ve remained connected to a lot of the professionals I’ve worked with in Maine, Indiana, Haiti, South Africa and Botswana,” Randy said.
“It’s not passive. It’s about asking people to talk about their work,” Randy said. “Asking people for a half hour of their time.”
Using this technique, Randy got his job in Ethiopia. “In 2003, I liked my work, but I wanted to do something more. I knew I wanted to do international work,” he said.
“I was taking people to dinner and just doing informational interviewing,” Randy said. “I was saying, ‘This is the kind of work I want to do. What do you think?’”
“Lo and behold someone said, ‘I know someone doing that type of work.’” They connected Randy with someone and he did an informational interview. Even though there was nothing available at that time, the person said they would reach out to him when it was available. “They did and that’s how I ended up in Ethiopia.”
“I believe in that personal connection of meeting people,” Randy said.
Randy has even cold emailed people. He asked the person to talk to him about his organization. Randy said, “I know you don’t have any open positions, but that’s not what I am asking. I am asking for information about the organization. The person was so gracious and was happy to talk to me.” That email led to three other referrals and one eventually led to a job.
Early on in his career, Randy decided rather than look at the job title, he would look at the type of work the position was doing. “That has led me to lots of meaningful work experiences working with lots of wonderful people,” Randy said.
“I’m really grateful at 50 that I did something radically different and new. Living in Ethiopia in 2008 and learning Amharic and learning a different culture rejuvenated me,” Randy said.
“It opened up my world.”
Advice to Others
“People have to make choices and be pragmatic,” Randy said.
He said that many people are trapped because of health insurance. He said it would be great if Medicare age was lowered to 60 so people could explore other options including part-time work or volunteering.
“I really think it’s a shame we don’t institute a GAP year in our 40s,” Randy said. “You get into a track and it’s easy to keep doing the same thing. “It would be nice if people had a year to figure out what they want the rest of their work path to look like.”
He does encourage others to look for other jobs after 50 by finding out about companies they may want to work with and figuring out what makes them happy.
What the Future Holds
Randy is currently working on a five-year plan. In five years, Walter will be able to retire. “We agreed to look where I am financially and health-wise and where he is health-wise and we’ll make a decision,” Randy said.
He said he doesn’t really know what things will look like in five years. “We’ll decide where we are and discern our best decision then,” Randy said. He said he may decide to work another couple of years beyond that depending where he is with his career.
“Eventually, I will be moving home to South Africa,” Randy said.
If you know anyone with who would make a good subject for my blog, please email me at ksparis15@gmail.com.
Beth Harbinson set out to help people with addiction issues and ended up starting a new business and a new life.
In 2017, Beth Sandbower Harbinson, now 63, was backstage at Merriweather Post Pavilion with friends. It was a big night out and she was ready to party. Her friends, who drank alcohol, “got these really cool drinks,” Beth said. However, she stopped drinking alcohol in 2005. So, when she got to the bar, wallet in hand, and asked for something non-alcoholic, she was offered water, soda or Red Bull. None of those choices sounded very festive. “It’s not an equitable choice,” Beth said. “Back then, there were not many non-alcoholic (NA) adult beverages available.”
That’s when Beth got an idea. She created Sobar, a non-profit specializing in providing non-alcoholic cocktail service. “I pitched this idea at a Shark-Tank like event called the Changemaker Challenge sponsored by United Way and The Horizon Foundation and thought why not?”
At the time, Beth was working full-time as the Executive Director of Children’s Scholarship Fund Baltimore. “I don’t know how I did it,” Beth said. “Because we did a lot (at Sobar). It was like having a second job.”
She ran Sobar “part-time” while working at the scholarship fund until this year when she decided to retire August 1. She helped transition a new executive director into the position and then moved onto retirement. “I had come to the conclusion of the substantive work that I had started,” Beth said. She saw that to continue and build Sobar, she would need to work on the project full time for a year and then assess her time commitment.
But the transition to retirement has not been without bumps. “I’m trying to figure out what I want to focus on. I’m wired to work,” Beth said.
“I am liking it (retirement), but I have to teach myself,” Beth said. She is still setting her alarm for 7:30 a.m., whether or not she has a meeting. She said she’s beginning to realize she doesn’t need to wake up at that time anymore except to take care of her four-legged alarm clocks — her 3 dogs.
For Beth, the best part of retirement has been more control over her time. “I’ve been able to prioritize what’s matters to me. I love my morning routine of mediation,” Beth said. “And I love to exercise.”
In addition to Sobar, she sits on the Opioid Community Crisis Council and Local Behavioral Health Authority Board. “We look at behavioral and mental health issues in Howard County and work with agencies to improve services and identify needs. I’m really passionate about dealing with these issues,” Beth said.
However, a majority of time is dedicated to her passion project Sobar. Sobar is a non-profit organization with a very specific mission – to provide and promote innovative beverage options to those who cannot or choose not to drink alcohol. Their current focus includes:
Creating awareness about the need to have non-alcoholic offerings at events.
Providing the non-alcoholic bar at large public events, and
Offering Sobar Certification to businesses and organizations.
Sobar Certification is a partnership Sobar offers to corporations, organizations and event venues that pledge to include equitable, non-alcoholic options at any event they are hosting. “In exchange the organization makes a meaningful contribution to Sobar annually that allows them to use our branding and gives them a direct line to our wholesalers. Nine times out of ten when we approach an organization, they say this makes so much sense, but we never thought about it,” Beth said.
“It’s a market that is rapidly going to expand in this country,” Beth said. “The market has exploded.” There are over 500 non-alcoholic options available according to Beth.
“It certainly helps people in recovery from alcoholism, but think about the other people who don’t drink. You’re pregnant. You’re on a drug for mental health or any medication where the label says ‘do not drink alcohol while on this drug.’ The designated driver. The person who doesn’t drink for religious reasons. Or the growing number of Gen Zer’s who are saying they want to moderate or reduce their alcohol intake – about 65 percent,” Beth said.
In addition to serving non-alcohol options and providing the certification, Sobar has NA options available on its website. They are working in partnership with wholesaler Better Rhodes and because they are a non-profit, a percentage of the sales help support Sobar’s mission.
Beth and her volunteers are unpaid. She does pay a few paid staff members, but the majority of the money goes to pay the “sobaristas.”
Soberistas are the bartenders for Sobar. The majority are in recovery and many of them live in halfway houses or sober living facilities. “Many of those people have a record because they have done things to support their disease, so it’s hard for them to get employment,” Beth said. “We love hiring these folks. I’ve met so many fascinating people.”
The sobaristas make $20 an hour and a minimum of $120 a shift. Beth said, “I think it’s important to pay a living wage to people.”
In addition, she knows many of her employees have lost their license and need to Uber to work. “That’s not inexpensive.”
“At the end of the day, if I help to keep one of my bartenders sober, that’s amazing, “Beth said.
Addiction in America
Beth stopped drinking in 2005. She knew that she had a problem with alcohol, but had been reluctant to face it. “It was a crazy, scary time,” Beth said. With encouragement from her family, she went to see a counselor and he suggested a 12-step program. “There are many roads to recovery,” Beth said, but this one has worked for her.
“I call mental health and substance abuse second class diseases,” Beth said.
“You can’t go to a hospital emergency room and get treatment.” When someone does seek help, oftentimes there is a long-wait to be admitted to a program.
“It’s crazy to me that something that is happening at epidemic levels is not more streamlined and mainstreamed in the continuum of care,” Beth said.
Raising Awareness
“We’re such an alcohol centric society,” Beth said. Sobar seeks to make not drinking mainstream.
When NA options are available “it’s just there. No one has to make a special request.” Beth said. “There is still so much stigma and shame associated with the disease of alcoholism and addiction. By having equitable NA options, hosts can help reduce those feelings.”
Beth works with organizations to promote NA options at events. She consults with organizations on the wording of their invitations to ensure they include information about having alcohol-free options. One example is a recent Bourbon & BBQ event that featured Zero proof counterparts.
“We do about 50 galas a year,” Beth said. Sobar can either set up a non-alcoholic bar or help curate non-alcoholic options for an organization.
“We can set up a bar that looks exactly like a regular bar with zero alcohol and with options that taste great.” Beth said.
Her work setting up these NA bars at events has been rewarding. “Occasionally someone will come up to us during an event and say ‘you helped keep me sober today.’ That makes it all worth it,” Beth said.
NA Products
Although Sobar does not manufacture NA products, it does work very closely with NA producers and wholesalers. Better Rhodes is their wholesaler. “I like these guys. I like their corporate values and I want to be associated with them,” Beth said.
The public can buy NA products through the Sobar website and Better Rhodes makes a donation to Sobar to support its mission. In addition, first time buyers going through the Sobar website receive a 10 percent discount.
Sobar’s number one drink is their Butterfly Pea Tree Lemonade. “We will probably never do a bar in the spring or summer without including it,” Beth said. “It’s a beautiful drink.” The ingredients combine to make a magenta-colored drink.
“My favorite pre-mixed drinks are Lyres pre-canned drinks from Australia,” Beth said. “One mimics a gin and tonic and it’s 45 calories.”
As further evidence of NA popularity, Beth said, “These products sell out.” She suggests people stock up for the holidays early. In addition to selling products through the website, Sobar will have local events leading up to the holiday season.
“What we’ve decided to focus on this holiday season is selling kits for home parties,” Beth said.
The weekend of November 25 through the 27, Beth and Sobar will be selling cocktail kits at the Kennedy Krieger Institutes’ Festival of Trees. In addition, there will be a Zero-Hour Happy Hour at Georgia Grace in Ellicott City December 8th from 6-8 p.m. There will be samples of the Sobar offerings, drinks and kits for sales as well as live music and Georgia Grace’s great menu.
It may seem as though Beth spends all of her time helping others, but she has made carving out time for herself and her husband Scott a priority as well.
“I’m having conversations with my spouse, whom I love, about what we are going to do together,” Beth said. Her spouse retired a couple of years ago.
Before retirement they led fairly autonomous lives as they both had very busy careers. “We are working with a consultant who works with people through life transitions,” Beth said. Jenn Gruber, a relationship consultant, helps them ask the questions they need to ask during this life transition.
Beth has agreed to do a four-day work week so one day a week they make spending time together a priority. They have bought electric bikes and riding bikes is often a part of their weekday off plan.
The Future Looks Bright
Beth said she knows how lucky she is to have retired early and be able to run Sobar unpaid. She credits her husband Scott with creating a sound financial plan for them. “Thank God I married an MBA,” Beth said.
In addition to promoting the Sobar Certification with organizations, Beth said she would like to have a retail store with a tasting room in the back. She’s not really interested in running a NA bar or restaurant, but is glad that there are more and more of these places opening up. There is an app called “Better Without” that helps people find NA establishments.
“We’re building a culture of celebration that is not so alcoholic centric,” Beth said. “I hope in some way we can shift the conversation.”
Sonja Schmitz’s life changed in a moment, but she didn’t let hold her back from a new career.
For Sonja Schmitz, having her annual mammogram was like going to the dentist every year or having an annual physical. She entered the office with no real concerns. But when they did the sonogram and she saw the results, she started to cry. “It was a horrible day. I just knew.” Even though she had been a biology professor for many years, that’s not why she knew there was a problem. “It wasn’t a brain thing. It was a visceral thing,” Sonja said.
Although the radiologist saw a tumor, he could not confirm that she had breast cancer. However, he performed a needle biopsy right then and there and called her on the weekend with the results. The tumor was malignant and she most likely had breast cancer.
Sonja and her husband Gary went through the Thanksgiving holidays not knowing the specifics of the diagnosis. “I started doing my literature searches and reading everything on the subject, ” Sonja said.
In mid-December, after more testing, her doctor confirmed the diagnosis. Sonja had stage two, triple negative breast cancer. “It was a very aggressive form of cancer,” Sonja said.
“By Christmas, we knew we were going to be in for a hell of a treatment,” Sonja said. She was facing eight months of chemo therapy and radiation. The chemo started a week after her January 9th surgery when they removed the tumor and the sentinel lymph nodes. The chemo lasted until July, then she began radiation every day for 35 days.
The chemo was once a week on Thursdays for four hours. “I never had to go alone,” Sonja said. She would invite a different friend to come each week and they would spend the treatment time catching up. “Some friends even came twice,” Sonja said. “That’s how I got through chemo.”
“I had a lot of” good friends. People came out the woodwork to help, in a good way,” Sonja said.
The treatment made Sonja gain over 30 pounds and made her hair fall out. The worst part was that water tasted metallic and food had to be heavily salted or very sweet for her to taste anything. However, she was grateful that she had no nausea or vomiting.
“I only have good things to say about St. Agnes Cancer Center,” Sonja said However, she and her oncologist did not agree on evaluating her prognosis. Her oncologist did not like to give a prognosis. Sonja said her research revealed that “stage 2 triple negative breast cancer with this treatment had a 93 percent chance that I won’t get cancer again.” Her doctor said, “What if you’re that 7 percent?”
“Can you say that to someone who’s sitting there?” Sonja said. “I hated her from that day on.” She stayed with her until she was done treatment and was in remission, but then switched oncologists.
Sonja was fortunate to have medical coverage through the College where her husband continues to work. “I didn’t have to pay a dime towards cancer treatment,” Sonja said.
By October 2019, she was declared cancer-free.
Making a Career Change
Previous to her diagnosis, Sonja was already struggling with her career. In 2016, she had been teaching for 15 years and was an associate professor of biology at the Community College of Baltimore County. She was feeling burnt out and unsure she wanted to continue.
Sonja let her Department Chair know how she was feeling. “The Chair said she was alarmed by what I said. I didn’t want to try anything new,” Sonja said.
Her Department Chair recommended that Sonja go on sabbatical in 2017. During that time, Sonja retrained herself and earned a certificate in Educational Research Methodology which would allow her to evaluate grant-funded projects.
She spoke with an evaluator who was already in the field. Sonja had worked with her on a previous project and that woman became her mentor. In addition to earning the certificate, Sonja was also able to spend time working in various departments at CCBC focusing on grants and research.
“I loved it!” Sonja said.
After the sabbatical, in the fall of 2018, Sonja returned to her work in the biology department, but was now the coordinator of department.
“When I accepted the position the Dean said I could not retire for at least three years. I agreed. Retirement was not on my horizon,” Sonja said.
“I came back that fall and everything was hunky dory until November when I went in for my mammogram,” Sonja said.
She tried to work from January to June. “It didn’t work. The energy wasn’t there. I had brain fog. At the time, you don’t realize fully how it’s affecting you,” Sonja said. By March, she stopped going to work.
“The College was wonderful. My colleagues were so supportive, “Sonja said. But she knew she needed to leave. The heavy fatigue accompanying the cancer made it impossible to continue and she officially retired in June 2019 at the age of 61.
With her new credentials, she knew there was something else in her future. “I knew I wanted to do evaluation work in my retirement,” Sonja said. She had already been approached by someone to work with her organization. She had a plan.
By the fall Sonja the American Association of University Women (AAUW), a non-profit in D.C. was one of her clients. “I felt good about doing the work for someone like AAUW,” Sonja said.
Her evaluation work is secured by grant-funded projects to help them determine the effectiveness of their work. They require an outside evaluator to work with the team and to document their process. “You’re not there to tell them, you need to this, this and this. Your’re not there to monitor them” Sonja said. “You solicit feedback about the project in the form of surveys and interviews and write a report once a year.”
Sonja not only loves the work, but it has helped she and Gary meet their financial needs.
Between Social Security, her evaluation work and the money her husband was still making teaching at CCBC, they enjoy a comfortable lifestyle in retirement.
Surviving COVID
Unlike many people, Sonja’s work was not affected by COVID because it is mostly online. “It did affect the colleges and the grants and that piece needed to be documented in my reports,” Sonja said.
Although COVID did not affect her work, it did affect her socially, but in a positive way. “I got to know my neighbors really well. We’ve become very close friends as well as neighbors,” Sonja said.
Her Garden, Her Passion
Sonja’s pride and joy is her garden, which she began in 2004. She hired someone to remove the lawn and put down mulch and put down some perennial plants. Later, she hired a landscape architect to come in and design a garden with native plants. “That’s what I needed. Ever since then, it’s been fun,” Sonja said. As a biologist, she knew it was important to have native plants that the wildlife were already used to. Gary buys the yard art and bird feeders for her garden to help reflect the light and provide focal points.
Gary bought her a little gardening stool when she was in treatment so she could continue to work in the garden and do a little bit of weeding. “I was pleasantly surprised that my garden had matured to the point that taking that spring and summer off didn’t affect it that much.”
Enjoying Retirement
“I knew I was the type of person who couldn’t just let go,” Sonja said. “I do enjoy working and having that little bit of structure.”
“I’m going to keep working as long as it’s enjoyable,” Sonja said. She loves the flexibility of the evaluation work. “I can take a break and fold laundry or just hang out with the cats,” Sonja said. She loves being in charge of her own schedule.
One of the other benefits of retirement has been that Sonja has time to cook more and make healthier dinners. “That’s fun.”
However, they also love going out to eat and going away for long weekends.
The highlight of her retirement so far was a trip on a Viking River cruise to celebrate the end of her cancer treatment. She booked it in the fall of 2019 but because of the pandemic they weren’t able to go until 2022. “It did finally happen this past summer!” Sonja said.
“We had the full treatment during the cruise. It was the trip of a lifetime,” Sonja said. They went from Switzerland to Amsterdam after which they flew to Dublin to spend time with their son and his family.
Final Advice
Although Sonja did not enter retirement in the way she wanted, she had an idea of what she wanted it to look like. “Have a plan. Have a financial plan,” Sonja said.
Even if she hadn’t had cancer, Sonja knew that she was not going to continue working at the College much longer.
Note:
Please make sure to get your yearly mammogram. It makes a difference. Don’t put it off until it’s convenient. It will never be convenient.
If you have a suggestion for someone I should interview, please email me karensparis15@gmail.com.
“I had the career my fourteen-year-old self always wanted,” said Pete Kerzel, 62. Pete had a long career as a journalist and spent the last 12 years as the managing editor for MASNsports.com, covering the Baltimore Orioles and Washington Nationals.
Welcome to Ocean City! Pete gets the key to his condo.
He was paid to watch baseball games and go down to spring training. He was there the night Cal Ripken Jr. beat the streak and met many of his childhood heroes, including Brooks Robinson. “How many people get to live their dream?“ Pete said.
When Pete began to think of retirement, he still loved his job, but he began to notice a change. “The written word is being minimized,” he said. “And I’m a written word guy.”
He added, “I could see what was coming down the pike. They didn’t want to hire more writers.” He saw a shift away from writing and more toward videos, social media and TikTok.
In addition, the demands of the job began to wear on him. Pete was always on call in case someone signed a contract or a team made a trade or some other story. “I would have to bring my computer with me when I went out to dinner with friends,” Pete said. “It just wasn’t as much fun anymore.”
The real turning point came when Pete met with Chip Herring, his Ameriprise financial advisor, in the Spring of 2020, almost a year after the death of his mother. His advisor said, “Just so you know, you can retire now.” Pete said he remembers thinking “What?!” He was surprised that at the age of 60, spending a lifetime in a profession known for lower salaries, that he was able to retire.
Where to retire was easy. Ocean City, Md., had always held a special place in Pete’s heart. Being in OC evokes memories of spending time “down the ocean” with his parents and friends. “I’ve been coming to Ocean City since I’ve been six years old,” Pete said
He started looking for property in August 2020. At that point, he saw it as a place he would be able to use when he wasn’t working and eventually retire to. By the time he bought in December 2020, he knew that he would be moving there sooner than he thought.
Pete knew exactly what he was looking for and how much he wanted to spend. He said he and his real estate agent, Terry Miler, looked at 40 or 50 condos. He bought right as the market was beginning to tick up with people relocating due to COVID.
He began living down there part-time while he working remotely due to COVID. As he began living in Ocean City for weeks at a time, it became increasingly difficult for him to drive back home over the Bay Bridge to the Western Shore. “Then, when I would reverse that and come to the beach, I would think everything felt right again.”
World Series 2019 with Mark Zuckerman and Byron Kerr in Nationals Park.
In October 2021, Pete spoke to his supervisor to let him know he would be leaving the following April. When he told his boss he was ready to retire, his boss said. “I’m so happy for you.” He knew the toll the 80-hour weeks were taking on Pete.
“The timing was right. I got out on my terms when I wanted to,” Pete said.
On April 20,, 2022 Pete moved to Ocean City, got himself settled, and was able to finish out the month virtually before retiring on April 30, 2022.
Upon retiring, Pete received some advice from a friend. “Don’t do anything for six months.” Pete took that advice to heart. His six months was up the Thursday after we spoke.
Life Down the Ocean
But Pete didn’t exactly spend all his time sitting in his condo reading, although he did that, too. He began writing for the Delmarva Shorebirds game program. “I put the ‘free’ in freelance, “ Pete said – and he couldn’t be happier. He’s already looking forward to next season.
2022 Delmarva Shorebirds game with Bob Stine.
He also did two important things that any senior who retires to OC should do: get a pass to Assateague Island National Seashore and get a OC bus pass.
The lifetime senior pass to Assateague Island costs $85. With that pass, Pete can go to the Island to watch the ponies or just enjoy the beach whenever he wants. He can also take a friend for free.
The senior bus pass gives free bus rides to people over 60 and free tram rides before 4 p.m. After 4 p.m., Pete gets a dollar off tram rides “They aren’t making any money on me,” he said.
Pete loves to ride the tram. ”The smell of the caramel popcorn or the sound of a kid squealing in the arcade because he won a prize can take me back 50 years.”
Pete also thinks of his friend, Barry Diffendal, when he rides the tram. Barry passed away suddenly in 2012 after only one year in retirement. Barry and Pete often joked about retiring to OC and Barry would say, “You drive the tram and I’ll be the conductor in the back.”
Transitioning into Retirement
Pete said it took a good 6 to 8 weeks for him to get used to being retired. “It was a huge thing to get used to. I can go shopping when I want to go shopping. I don’t have to wedge it in,” he said.
“I hadn’t had a normal day in years,” Pete said. In his previous life, he had an erratic sleep schedule as he was required to work whenever the teams were playing. If there was a West Coast game, Pete would often have to stay up until 2 or 3 a.m. after the game finished so he could edit online stories.
Now, his time is his own and he is enjoying shopping when he wants, reading by the pool (during the summer time) and walking along the beach and boardwalk. He is also able to watch baseball for the sheer enjoyment of it and can turn off a game if it gets boring or goes into a rain delay.
Socializing with Friends
The other thing that Pete is enjoying is being able to spend time with his friends, “I got a two-bedroom condo so friends could come for a visit,” he said.
Some of his friends even live in OC either full-time or part-time.
Two his friends moved down there a year before he did. “They were a great resource,” he said. Not only does he spend time with them, but they have also introduced him to their friends.
One thing Pete enjoys is going with his friends, Greg and Cindy Cannizaro, to the Elks Club on Thursday nights for the fried chicken finner. Pete said it’s a great deal at just $12.
“Also, I can buy a round drinks for the table for just $6,” he added.
For Pete, retirement has been about seizing opportunities.
He said he loves being available for last minute events. Whether it’s seeing John Fogarty in Selbyville or watching the air show practice from a pontoon boat, Pete is ready for fun.
He is one of the few year-rounders in his community. This winter will be his full winter in OC. “I predict at some time this winter I’m going to bored out of my gourd,” he said. However, there are many things to do even off season and Pete knows many people there.
“I forgot that it was possible to be spontaneous,” Pete said. “It’s been a very long time since I’ve been in an position where I can choose when to do things and it’s been fun.”
Tourist Season
For some people the tourist season from May to September/October could be a deterrent from moving down to OC, but Pete takes it all in stride.
“I love the water. I love the salt air,” Pete said. “So, you have to punt June, July and August for April, May, September and October. Sure, the summer months can be crazy, but it’s really fun to see the town so energized.”
There about 7,500 to 8,000 year-round residents in Ocean City. In the summer time, the population swells.
A beautiful sunset at Pete’s condo.
He said, “I enjoyed this spring watching the town gear up and get ready for the invasion of the summer people. It was a kick.”
Of course, he has had to make some concessions during tourist season, like doing his grocery shopping during the week. “You don’t want to go to the grocery store Friday, Saturday, Sunday or Monday.”
Also, there are also some restaurants that he doesn’t go to during season because there just too many people in town and the prices are higher.
But he said OC has changed a lot over the years. “’It’s more of a year-round thing now,” Of course, some places do close, but others offer dinner specials and happy hours to get customers in the door. His favorite pizza place, Pino’s, is closed for the season, but he waits in patient anticipation for it to reopen in May.
Luckily, Happy Jack Pancake House, which Pete calls his second home, is year-round, though only on the weekends in the offseason.
Making Finances Work
Pete was able to retire early because he made savings a priority. He’ll have a small pension from MedStar Health, where he worked in public/media relations for almost a decade, but he’s contributed to 401k plans through other employers and socked away money in his Ameriprise accounts.
When his mother passed away in 2019, he took the proceeds from the sale of his mother’s house plus some other inheritance, and put it into an annuity. He will tap that when he turns 65. For now, he is paying himself a salary out of his savings and will be collecting social security and his pension. This allows him to live the way he wants to live.
He gets his medical insurance through the Affordable Care Act. He said that the insurance is good, but the bureaucracy has been frustrating at times.
Final Words of Advice
“I don’t miss 80-hour weeks. I don’t miss waiting for my expense check,” Pete said. “That stuff, let somebody else do it. I’m so happy to not be dealing with it now.”
For Pete, retirement is a new beginning. “I look at this chapter as a blank slate,” he said.
He remembers a few days after he moved down and settled in thinking, “What do I do now?”
Then he said, a little apparition appeared over his head and said, “You can do whatever you want.”
What Pete wants to do is carve out time for himself and just appreciate his time in Ocean City. His condo backs up to a bayfront marsh and one of his favorite things to do is sit on his screened deck and watch the wildlife including herons, otters and foxes.
“I get these incredible sunsets and it’s as though someone painted the sky,” Pete said.
He is not sure what he is going to do now that his six months are up. He might volunteer or get a part-time job. He is leaving the door open to new opportunities.
Before he moved to he said, “I thought: What’s the worst thing that could happen? If I don’t like it here, I can move back to Baltimore, But I don’t think that’s going to happen. This is home now.”
If you know someone who you would think would make a good subject for my blog, email me at karensparis15@gmail.com.
It’s time to hit the courts for Pickleball. Are you game?
Alright, admit it. You knew at some point I would do a blog about pickleball. As I told my husband “All the cool kids are doing it!”
Although apparently it’s not just the cool kids over 50. Did you know there was now a professional Pickle Ball League? No kidding! Some of the biggest names in sports are buying professional pickleball teams. Tom Brady and Kim Clijsters (tennis) both own teams.
With all the hubbub, I had to find out what it was all about.
I have never been very sports-oriented. I was a cheerleader in high school and a personal trainer in my 40s, but I have never really played sports, so I decided to take lessons.
My husband, always supportive, agreed to take them with me. He is an athlete, but more as a runner and cyclist, so I felt we were pretty even.
We decided to take lessons at the Dancel YMCA in Howard County. I know there are many places to play and take lessons, but I was already a member so it seemed like a good choice.
If you’re not familiar with pickleball it is a cross between tennis and ping pong. It can be played on a tennis court, but there are different lines and boundaries. Our lines are purple. Not sure if they are purple everywhere, but wouldn’t you think they’d be green.
The racquets are a lot like ping pong paddles except a little longer and narrower.
For me the real difference is the balls. The balls are fluorescent and are just like the whiffle balls we grew up with. You would think they wouldn’t bounce very well, but they do. They also hurt when you get hit with them.
At the Y, the instructor loaned us racquets. I took the one with a dragon on it. I thought I could channel the fire of the dragon into my hit.
We also received a basket of big whiffle balls. They were the only types of balls I could ever hit with a bat, so I was already familiar with them.
It seems as though it would be the perfect “couple” sport. There are usually two people on a team and they work in tandem to prevent the other team from scoring. However, we heard that sometimes it’s not a great idea for couples to be on the same team. It can cause arguments. I think it might cause more issues if they were on opposing teams. We’re not there yet.
Our pickleball coach said the first rule was to “stay out of the kitchen.” Hey, that worked for me. They told me that the first day of Weight Watchers too.
The kitchen is the front court essentially and you aren’t supposed to hang out there. You can put one foot in, but then you taken one foot out. You put one foot in, but no shaking it all about like the Hokey-Pokey.
When you are up by the kitchen, you are dinking. (I really couldn’t make this stuff up.) Dinking is when you hit the ball softly over the net. Even the professionals dink. All pickleball players dink at some point.
Dinking did not really seem to be in my nature. I was more a slamming and lobbing kind of player, which has its place in pickleball.
Once we were done dinking, we rallied and volleyed. That means we ran around the court trying to hit the ball. Finally, we were ready to play a game, but not until lesson two.
Even before our lesson was over, the gym started to fill with pickleball players. The began lining up on the beach behind the courts. Apparently, you get in line and when you get to the head of the line it’s your turn to play.
Score keeping is pretty easy. You score on your serve. Just like tennis, the ball has to land in a specific section in order to be considered good. Unlike tennis, you serve underhand. There are none of those fabulous shots of a player arching back to hit the ball like there are in tennis. It’s more like a softball pitch.
Each player gets to serve before the serve is returned to the other team. Easy peasy. Not.
You only play to 11 unless a lot of people are waiting to play then it’s 9. And there are always a lot of people waiting to playing.
I had a great revelation after my first lesson. Pickleball really is fun and despite it’s silly name, it’s a serious workout. My heart rate got up and the next day muscles I hadn’t heard from in years were speaking my name.
During our second lesson, I got a sage piece of advice. “Don’t keep extra balls in your pocket. If you fall down and land on them, they hurt.” How did she know I fall down a lot? I think it’s more likely they would serve as a cushion when, not if, I fall.
During my third lessons, we had newbies on the court. You know, the ones who hadn’t had two whole lessons like I had. I was patient with them.
After my third lesson, I decided to take the plunge a buy a racquet. In the past, I had bought equipment that I had never touched again and later sold at yard sales for a tenth of the price. I don’t think that’s going to happen with my pickleball paddles.
I don’t think a professional pickleball career is in my future. I mean I am retired. I don’t want to have to start traveling the country to play in tournaments, but I do have my eye on a prize.
At the YMCA they have tournaments and I am already visualizing myself winning the grand prize. — A jar of pickles.
I love to tell people’s stories. If you know someone over 50 who has made a major life change, send me an email karensparis15@gmail.com. I would love to interview them.
Ed Johnson is making the most of his retirement by opening up to many opportunities.
For Ed Johnson, 79 and a half, retirement has never been about relaxing and taking it easy. It’s been all about helping others. In fact, his wife of 56 years, Pat, even calls him “Saint Edward.”
But Ed was helping people long before he retired. He spent his career in education as a teacher and principal. Then in 1995, at the age of 52, Ed decided to retire after 30 years of service.
His father had died at the age of 52 of heart disease and Ed wasn’t quite sure how much time he had. “I didn’t have any plans after 52 and I thought I might not be around to make any plans,” Ed said.
But that quickly changed.
He took a part-time job at the University of Maryland College Park working with student teachers as a field-based instructor. Working 2 to 3 days a week gave him more time to pursue his many interests and spend more time with his family.
“It was like opening a door to many possibilities,” Ed said.
He stayed there for another 20 years and was proud to have the opportunity to mentor so many teachers. The last 10 years he worked with masters-level students. “Working with them was a breeze,” said Ed.
Then, at the age of 72, he retired, retired. “My supervisor asked me, “why are you retiring, don’t you like teachers or the principals or something?'” Ed said. “I said, no they’re great. I just need a change.”
That change was to do more of what he was already doing.
His Passion for Patapsco Park
Ed has always had an interest in nature and the environment. Twenty-five years ago, after his initial retirement, he began working as a volunteer at Patapsco Valley State Park. He would help clear trails and do general work in the park. “I wanted to follow up with my interest in environmental education,” Ed said.
He then became a volunteer ranger for 16 years “As a volunteer ranger, you wear a uniform and are the eyes and ears of the park rangers,” he said. His work included monitoring various areas of the park, staffing the entrance areas and conducting history walks.
He recently went back to being a volunteer. “I still do a lot of what I was doing as a volunteer ranger — monitoring area of the park, doing history walks, art programs. whatever needs to be done,” Ed said.
COVID created even more of a need for Ed’s time. “The park used to average a million visitors a year, ” Ed said, “but during COVID they averaged 2.6 million visitors a year. It was crowded in there.”
On Saturdays, Ed sets up a table in the Orange Grove section of the park near the Swinging Bridge. He brings a large binder with pictures and fun facts to teach kids and adults about the history of the park. “I like to show the kids, particularly the girls, how they would have had to dress if they were here in 1911,” Ed said.
In fact, Ed had become such as expert on the history of the park that he was asked to collaborate with Betsy McMillion to write a book about the park’s history.
After 3 and a half years of research, the book was published by Arcadia Publishing in the Spring of 2019. “Images of America: Patapsco Valley State Park” recounts the history of Patapsco from the 1600s to present day. All of the money from the sale of the book goes to support the Friends of Patapsco Valley State Park who support the maintenance of the park. He and Betsy don’t make any money from the sale of the book.
Ed and co-author Betsy McMillion
Ed recounts a story about when the book was first released. He and his co-author had a book signing at Barnes & Noble in Ellicott City. He said, “They called to say that they had 60 copies and asked if that would be enough,” Ed said. “There had been a great deal of publicity and I thought they should order more.” That day Barnes & Noble had 105 copies on hand and sold 104. The book is still on sale at Barnes & Noble as well as through other vendors.
“People are fascinated with many aspects of the park including the Swinging Bridge and floods. They know a little bit about (Tropical Storm) Agnes in 1972,” Ed said. He also talks about the firsts of the park including the B&O railroad, the Thomas Viaduct and the first female ranger in Maryland who worked at Patapsco.
For those interested he is also doing a history powerpoint with the Arbutus library on October 8th at 2 p.m. He has done similar talks at libraries and senior centers throughout the area.
Exploring His Creativity Through Painting
But working at the park is not the only activity that keeps Ed busy. He is also an accomplished artist who has won numerous awards. However, Ed got into painting accidentally in 1976.
“The elementary school where I was principal had a large Hispanic population. I decided to brush up on his Spanish,” Ed said. He went to sign up for a night course, but found that it had been cancelled. He needed to do something besides work so he started taking a night school art class taught by a local high school teacher, Keith Lauer. “That’s when I got started with painting,” Ed said.
Ed found he had a real talent for painting and continued taking courses through other local studios.
Once he was retired, he was able to spend more time painting and even began teaching. “I replicated his (Keith Lauer’s) style when I started with a class at our senior center,” Ed said. Each class started with a 15 minute lecture on composition or color. “Each week you would get a little bit more information and after a while you would learn a lot,” Ed said.
He began teaching a class at his local senior center which then morphed into an art group that still meets every Friday. He has also taught classes at the local men’s shelter to give the men an outlet for their feelings. “Some of them aren’t that interested, but others are,” Ed said.
Ed also combines his volunteer activities at the park with his love of art. He sets up painting sessions at the park where he provides all the supplies. The sessions are for people 8-years-old and older.
As part of this activity, Ed provides a folder with 200 nature-related pictures that people can choose from to paint. All the pictures are for 16×20 canvasses. There is a grid on the picture and the canvas so students can replicate the shape of the animal and be pretty accurate. Because of COVID, Ed was not able to have sessions with the public this year, but he was able to have a class with a group of seniors who do a lot with the park.
Personally, Ed has painted numerous painting through the years. Many of his paintings are of nature, birds, flowers and people. These painting have been displayed in art exhibits and have won many awards throughout the state of Maryland.
Serving Through Mission Trips
Ed has another passion project besides painting and working in the park. Since 2004, he has gone to the Rosebud Reservation in South Dakota for 15 times (except when the trip was cancelled due to COVID). He was able to go back again this year in June.
Ed and a small group of volunteers from Catonsville United Methodist Church began going to the reservation to make repairs on homes and help in any way they could. Before COVID, they also had a food program preparing over 250 hot breakfasts and hot lunches for those in need. Now, most of the work centers around making repairs around the reservation. This year they spent their time at the reservation building a handicap ramp.
Ed working on the Rosebud Reservation
Ed has many stories about the amazing people he met on the reservation including Lakota chef Seth Larvie who created tasty meals for the residents. Ed also developed a long-term friendship with Roy Spotted War Bonnet. Ed was looking forward to seeing his friend on this trip, but found out that he had passed away during the pandemic.
Ed has been struck by the difficult lives of the people on the reservation and feels it’s important to spend both his time and money making their lives better. He recently recorded his stories about his experiences and the people he met during his trips in a personal memoir.
The Best Part of Retirement
For Ed, one of the greatest pleasures retirement brought him has been time with his family. His granddaughter was born the year he retired and he was able to take care of her one day a week. As she grew, he took her to her riding lessons and she became an accomplished equestrian.
Ed and his wife Pat
He was also able to spend more time with his two sons. He and his son Adam took a canoe trip on the Potomac from Point of Rocks, MD. His other son enjoyed playing baseball and Ed was able to attend the games.
And he and Pat made a point to travel. They traveled quite a bit including throughout the United States, Europe and Canada. He also went with a group to the Galapagos Islands.
His Advice to Others
What Ed likes most about retirement is the flexibility. “I was working in a job where I was in the school at 7 a.m. and didn’t leave until 5:30 or so,” Ed said. “I couldn’t take off to run errands. I had no flexibility.” When he retired all that changed. “So when I retired I had flexibility to pursue hobbies like painting and the outdoor stuff and I had time to do things with my family.”
But Ed knows everyone is not ready to retire at 52. “Retire when you’re ready. You know better than anyone else when the time is right,” Ed said. However, he warns, “Don’t retire to nothing. Retire to something you are really interested in.”
He recommends working as a volunteer. “You can help somebody and you can make a difference.” He also says it’s a great way to try things and see what you enjoy.
“Certain things will work out. Certain things won’t So then, you move on and try something different. Look for new opportunities and try them out,” Ed said.
However, he warns that it’s important to not be too structured. He was able to take care of unexpected opportunities such as writing the book and going to the reservation because he kept his schedule flexible.
This summer Ed has had to spend time doing something he is not used to doing — sitting down. He came home from the reservation with a bad cough and then had a leg injury and shoulder surgery. Now, he is happy to be getting back to his regular busy schedule.
He and Pat are going to the gym together five mornings a week at 6 a.m. and they also volunteer to serve lunch to the community on Wednesdays at Catonsville United Methodist Church.
For Ed, retirement has opened up a world of opportunities that he never would have time for if he was still working full-time. He said he never regrets making the decision to retire.
If you know someone who would make a good subject for this blog, email me at ksparis15@gmail.com.
Kelly and Mike Strzelecki think that retirement is for the birds. Find out how they are enjoying their passion for nature after retirement.
Mike (59) and Kelly (58) Strzelecki retired from the federal government on March 31, 2021. It was the culmination of a plan that began more than 30 years ago when they met on the MARC train commuting to Washington D.C.
Mike worked for the Federal Energy Regulatory Commission and Kelly worked for the USDA Foreign Agricultural Service. By working for the federal government, they knew could retire with a pension and health insurance when they turned 56 years old and had 30 years of service. So, they decided to leave when they were both eligible.
Mike and Kelly had long been outside enthusiasts, but the long commute between Baltimore and Washington made it challenging to find time to pursue all their varied interests. “In D.C., I think retirement is more dictated by the commute than the job. People get tired of the commute,” Mike said.
In addition to the commute, Mike had personal experience about missed opportunities in retirement. His father passed away when he was 56. “My dad had big plans in retirement and then he passed away and he couldn’t do them,” Mike said. “We thought, we can’t do that.”
With their plan in place, Mike and Kelly knew they could retire early and spend even more time doing what they love—being out in nature.
“Every morning I get up a pack a backpack,” Mike said. What’s in the backpack depends on the plans for the day. Plans might include a simple walk, a hike, kayaking or fly-fishing. They have also recently taken up disc golf, which they play at McKeldin Park as well as other local areas.
However, their favorite outside activity is birding.
Birding is different from birdwatching in the “birders” actually go out looking for specific birds. They do their research and observe the bird’s behaviors and migratory patterns. “It’s about immersing yourself in the lifestyle of the bird,” Mike said.
“There’s more intention to it than birdwatching,” Kelly said.
Extensive travelers, many of their trips revolve around birding. Their next trip is to Bombay Hook in Delaware. “It’s a good birding spot,” Mike said. There are all different types of raptors, hawks and eagles, avocets and shorebirds.
Closer to home, Patapsco State Park, Mike and Kelly found a nest with two baby owls. They were able to find the nest because of their familiarity with bird calls. “We could hear the babies crying for their mom,” Kelly said.
Being retired, Mike and Kelly were able to visit the site and record the owls’ progression every day over the course of 10 days. “Part of the beauty of retirement is the owl thing. It gives us time during the week when no one is around to actually observed them,” Mike said. “We can take our time to focus on things,” Mike said. “If we were still working, we never would have been able to do that,” Mike said.
As part of their passion for birding, Mike has started taking pictures. He purchased a new camera, NIKON Cool Pic, as part of his retirement gift. He takes close up, detailed shots of the birds they see. He captured pictures of the baby owls as well as pictures of puffins they saw during their recent trip to Iceland.
Enjoying Everyday Life
Mike and Kelly are enjoying their new lifestyle. “Every day I got up at 4:40. Not getting up at 4:40 is heavenly,” Mike said. Although for Mike, sleeping in is 6:30 or 7:00 a.m.
Kelly also loves sleeping in, but wakes up about 9:00 a.m. now that she’s retired. They enjoy leisurely time in the morning and have even trained their dog Trek to go get the newspaper so they can relax.
“You have time to enjoy things rather than just trying to fit them in,” Mike said. “I’m getting back to doing things I had a passion for, but I haven’t had the time for.” For Mike that includes fly-fishing and writing.
For Kelly, formerly an agricultural economist, she has picked up an additional hobby of raising monarch butterflies.
Kelly has been raising butterflies with mixed success. “You raise them by finding them as caterpillars and putting them in box with fresh milkweed,” Kelly said. It can be particularly challenging because you have to keep changing the milkweed in the box. She said that although she has had some success, she is afraid some of the milkweed had become contaminated with pesticides causing some of her monarchs to die. Still, she is enjoying the process and has even convinced some of her friends to raise their own monarchs.
“In October, 10s of thousands of monarch butterflies congregate in Cape May, New Jersey and then they migrate en mass,” Mike said. Mike and Kelly have a trip planned to watch the migration.
Kelly has also been busy in moving her mother from New Mexico to a local Senior Living Community. She said she isn’t sure how she would have handled the move if she had been working full-time.
Kelly is also involved with volunteer work through the Catonsville Women’s Giving Circle and says she plans to get involved with other groups and pursue additional volunteer opportunities.
Putting Their Financial House in Order
Before retiring, Mike and Kelly made sure they had finances in place. In addition to ensuring that they were both eligible to receive a pension, they paid off their mortgage and put their two children through college. “We’d done the major financial things, so we thought we should be ok,” Kelly said.
They had also spent their married life putting money away in investments and watching their spending. “We’ve lived a very modest lifestyle,” Mike said.
He told a story about an experiment people do with children, where they tell children they can have one marshmallow now, but if they wait, they can have two marshmallows. “We are two marshmallow people, “Mike said.
He added they have deferred some of their enjoyment so they can have more fun now. “It’s the life decisions you make along the way,” Mike said.
Advice to Others
“The transition to retirement is going to be harder for someone who is defined by their job,” Mike said. He was not defined by his job, but he knows others who are. His advice is that if you’re thinking about retiring, start getting involved with activities and other social groups before you retire.
Kelly’s advice, “Start young and make a plan. That makes it possible. Otherwise, you’re just playing catch up the whole time.” They have already given their children this same advice.
Future Plans
For now, Mike and Kelly are looking forward to enjoying the Fall and Winter months.
“It’s so nice that the kids have gone back to school so we don’t have to share the park with them,” Kelly says with a laugh. “Now it’s ours again.”
January through March is a great time to go birding and they spend more time doing that as other options such as kayaking are less available.
They also have so trips planned. They are headed to the Outer Banks, the Finger Lakes and even New York. Plus, they have birding trips planned as well.
“We call our house base camp. Living here is so convenient. We’re 3-hours from cities, beaches mountains that we can do as a day trip,” Mike said.
Kelly and Mike love having time to slow down and spend time doing things together even if it’s as simple as having a cup of tea or reading a book.
”I love getting back to things I have a passion for, but didn’t have time for. A lot of people have a lot of things they could enjoy in retirement, if they could just relax and slow down,” Mike said.
If you know someone who would make a great subject for my blog, email me at ksparis15@gmail.com.
Starting the big clean up has been a challenge. Who knew getting rid of 25 years of stuff wouldn’t be easy?
One of my goals in retirement has been to start the big clean out. That’s what everyone says you need to do when you retire.
Of course, I could have started during all those months in isolation during the pandemic, but instead my husband and I built shelves during that time so although there was not less stuff, at least it looked as though there was less stuff.
But as the philosopher says, “The longest journey begins with a single step.” Or something along those lines. So, I started the big clean out with a few little clean outs. At this point, the basement is still a little too much for me to tackle.
I decided to start with a few junk drawers. It was interesting to see how many drawers had been designated as junk drawers. And what had been designated as junk.
The greatest revelation has been how many pairs of scissors we own – 10. What is most surprising is that when we need them, we can never find them. Maybe that’s how we ended up with so many. I don’t know what the perfect number of scissors is, but I’m going to going to say that it is less than 10.
We also seem to have a need to measure things. (Keep it clean people.) We have multiple rulers, tape measures and large tape measurers for measuring rooms. I don’t have the final count, but it’s definitely in the double digits.
But we have no yard sticks. Do people even use yardsticks anymore? Since I think most people only used them to spank their children, they probably don’t sell them anymore. Let me know if you own one.
The tool boxes (yes plural) have been a revelation as well! Four hammers, screwdrivers and wrenches that I’m afraid to count and two levels. And of course, we saved every allen wrench from every piece of IKEA furniture that we have purchased during our 36 years of marriage. I may have to take up welding and create some sort of allen wrench monument to use them all.
I am very confused by finding so much stuff in my house. I have always considered myself organized and when my staff took me out to celebrate my retirement, they commented, multiple times, on my propensity to clean and organize. So, what happened? How did all these things get into my house and what do I do with them now that they are here?
If I were able to throw them out, I would have, but it seems so wasteful. Is there a place to donate these things?
I feel as though I am failing retirement 101 and I haven’t even gotten to the hard part. Calgon take me away!
Starting the Next Phase
I am currently working on my closet and have to restrain myself from throwing away all my work clothes. I really think I should keep a few just in case.
Another problem with my closet is finding things that are no longer “useful” but hold such great memories. For example, I heard bell bottom jeans are making a comeback and I’m sure after a few weeks on Weight Watchers I will fit into them again. Right?
I’m not making head away.
I think cleaning out my husband’s closet would help me clean out my closet. He doesn’t agree.
So far, I have emptied one tub. I guess I shouldn’t mention I emptied it by taking books out of it and putting them back on the bookshelf. Still, it felt good to see an empty tub.
Maybe an electronic cleanup of our computers would be easier.
I hope to have an update in October that I have successfully completed Stage 1 of the big clean out. At this point, I am gathering these items in my daughter’s old room until I figure out what to do next. Pretty soon, I’m going to need another room since my husband has prohibited anything else going in the basement.
Carol used her project management skills to plan the perfect retirement for herself and her husband Mike.
“Retirement is the best decision I ever made!” said Carol Opalski Hewitt.
In April of this year, Carol retired from her job as a Project Manager at T. Rowe Price and she and her husband Mike Hewitt moved down to the Del Webb community in Myrtle Beach, South Carolina.
Carol was only 59 and four months when she retired from T. Rowe Price but she knew it was the perfect time to leave. In March, she finished up 2 ½ year project. “I knew it was my swan song. I just couldn’t continue work 60 hours a week anymore,” Carol said.
But Carol and Mike had been thinking about retirement for a while. Seven years ago, while vacationing in Myrtle Beach, they decided that it was the perfect place for their forever home. It had everything they wanted. Sun. Beaches. The ocean. Warm weather. Low taxes. Close proximity to an airport.
Since Carol’s children and mother still live in Baltimore, it was important that there was a quick and convenient way for them to get back home. Super convenient, economical flights from Myrtle Beach to Baltimore made it the perfect location.
About three years ago, it was time to figure out how to make early retirement possible. Mike had left the workforce in 2001 to take care of their children, so many of the decisions were based on Carol’s income.
They met with a financial adviser at T. Rowe Price who helped guide them through the planning process. “The homework came back to me. How much do we need to retire?” Carol said. Carol emphasizes need rather than want. They needed to consider insurance, health insurance, long-term care insurance and other necessities. But they also considered their wants such as travel, new furniture, a golf cart and other entertainment. The fun stuff. Luckily, Carol and Mike were on the same page when it came to retirement goals.
“You work all your life. You want to enjoy your quality of life while you can,” Carol said.
Finding the Right Community
Then they had to decide where in Myrtle Beach they wanted to live. They looked at three different communities long before they were going to retire. In addition to Del Webb, they considered Waterford Plantation and Berkshire Forest. But ultimately, they decided on Del Webb because it was an active over 55 adult community. “You can be as busy as you want to,” Carol said.
At Del Webb, there are two different builders you can chose from to construct your home. Carol and Mike were able to choose from five different models. “From down payment to settlement was six months,” Carol said. The community has an active calendar of events, pool, concerts and many different groups and activities.
Since moving there, Carol, always an avid tennis player, has taken up pickle ball and plays 5 mornings a week. Her days are now busier than they when she was working.
They have developed a group of about 12 couples who they spend time with going to concerts, hanging out at the pool and going to dinner together.
In addition, Carol does volunteer work like helping out at community concerts.
When her sister said she was worried about Carol staying busy, her response was, “Don’t worry, I am.”
Getting Ready for the Move
After deciding where they were going to move, it was time to make a plan. “Plan the work and work the plan,” Carol said.
As a project manager, Carol backed into her dates. She knew when they were moving and then decided when each step needed to happen.
The first step was to start to cleaning out. It took about eight months. “We were fairly aggressive,” Carol said.
“You need to decide what do you will need in your new life.” Things like her china and vintage martini glasses were some of the things that weren’t going to make the move.
Instead, they sold or donated many of the items. “Catonsville Marketplace and Catonsville Yard Sale are great,” Carol said.
Her advice. “Down size. Down size. Down size.”
In addition, Carol and Mike have two children and their stuff was in their house. Their daughter had already moved out and bought a house, but didn’t take everything with her. Carol and Mike drove her things over to her house and left them there!
Their son was still unsure as to whether or not to make the move with them, but after deciding to stay in Baltimore, he moved out in about three days and took all of his stuff with him. Phase one completed.
Selling Their Home
Next, they needed to sell their home. Because of the hot real estate market earlier this year, Carol and Mike decided put their house on the market on December 26th and sell it themselves. It sold within 4 days. Then they negotiated with the buyers so that they could stay in the house until they were ready to move to South Carolina. “I put the plan in motion and everything fell in line,” Carol said.
Before listing the house, Carol researched other listings and picked and chose key words to get their listing noticed.
They made the decision to not make a lot of upgrades or repaint their home because the next buyer would probably want to make their own design decision. It worked out for them.
Selling their house quickly and for a good profit was key to their retirement plan. “It helped that our house had appreciated so much,” Carol said.
Deciding What to Move
Next, they decided on what they wanted to move. Even though Carol was committed to getting rid of the clutter, there were some things that she decided were worth moving. “It’s important to look at things with a different eye,” Carol said. For example, they decided to move their brown bedroom furniture.
However, once they moved down south, Carol used her newly acquired chalk painting skills to paint it grey and white so it looks beachier. In fact, she has become so good at chalk painting that she has been helping some her friends with their projects as well.
Life In South Carolina
“The best part about being retired is doing what I want to do, when I want to do it,” Carol said.
She doesn’t miss routine of work because she has a new routine. She is on the pickle ball court bright and early at 8 a.m. 5 days a week.
In addition, each week, they review the calendar of events and decide what they are going to do. Of course, errands still need to be done. Wednesday is food shopping day because seniors get 5 percent off. “I take Mike with me because I’m not a senior yet,” Carol said.
They’ve had no problem adjusting to spending more time together. “I think COVID helped with the transition,” Carol said. But they are not spending that much additional time together. Mike doesn’t play pickle ball, instead he walks the dog. At the pool, she hangs out with the girls and he hangs out with the guys.
Carol said she likes having friends around who are of similar age and similar interests. The only bad part about their new friends is that many of them are Steelers fans. Go Ravens!
Finances and Paperwork
Even now that they are retired, Carol and Mike still consider expenses and do paperwork.
“Your expenses will be higher your first few months after retirement,” Carol said. For them, they wanted to buy new things for the house and try new restaurants. However, after a few months of being retired, she sees those expenses are starting to normalize.
Except health insurance. Health insurance is their biggest expense.
At this point Carol is on COBRA and will stay on that for the next 18 months. “It’s very expensive because our son is still on our plan,” Carol said. After the 18 months, she will have to go on the open market or pick up the insurance through T. Rowe. Still, they knew health insurance would continue to be a big expense and they planned for it.
The one down side to retirement so far has been paperwork. Carol has been inundated with paperwork. The biggest challenge was working with the Maryland Motor Vehicle Administration to get their car registrations changed.
But there is also quite a bit of insurance paperwork. It’s not only the paperwork that is a challenge, it’s also finding new doctors. “It’s difficult to find doctors down here that are accepting new patients,” Carol said. Right now, she and Mike are flying back to Baltimore for their doctor’s appointments while they wait to get doctor’s appointments booked out in the future in South Carolina.
But with round trip ticket to Baltimore under a $100, it’s working for now. However, Carol doesn’t want to go back to Baltimore too often. “There’s so much going on here, I don’t want to miss anything,” she said.
Final Advice
Carol and Mike are loving their new life in South Carolina. They are meeting new people, starting new hobbies and keeping busy. Still, sometimes Carol likes some down time.
“This morning I was getting ready to head out to pickle ball at 8 when it starts raining and the texts start flying. ‘Are we going? Are we not going?’” The decision was no pickle ball that day. “So, it was nice to have a second cup of coffee and get some things done around the house,” Carol said. Retirement is everything they thought it would be…and more.
If you know someone who would make a good interview for this blog, email me at ksparis15@gmail.com.
Tara Ebersole has been making the most of her retirement. She believes learning and growing is the key to growing older gracefully.
If you look up Renaissance Women in a dictionary, Tara Ebersole’s picture should be there. She had a successful career as a biology professor and STEM director at the Community College of Baltimore County (CCBC). She is also a musician, artist, wife, mother and grandmother, and is now adding author to her resume.
One of the reasons that Tara is so active is she realizes just how lucky she is to be here. At the age of 47, Tara was exercising on her mini-trampoline when she felt extreme pain in her head. “If you had told me I had been shot in the head, I would have believed it,” Tara said. “The pain was so severe that I collapsed.”
Her 11-year-old son found her and with the help of his sisters, called 911. Tara was rushed to the hospital and diagnosed with a ruptured aneurism. At first, the doctors couldn’t find the location of the bleed. She remembered the doctor telling her, “We can make you comfortable, but we can’t guarantee you’re going to wake up in the morning.
But she did wake up the next day and made it through a slow and difficult recovery. “I came out with the idea that I had to prove that my brain is ok,” Tara said.
Life After Her Illness
She approached life with a renewed enthusiasm. In addition to continuing her role teaching at CCBC, she began working on her PhD and added the duties of STEM (Science, Technology, Engineering and Math) director to her already busy schedule.
As part of her STEM work, she started a non-profit to increase the number of women and minorities in STEM. The non-profit was so successful that after five years, she disbanded it. Together with a team from BCPS, multiple professors and local colleges, the number of minorities in CCBC STEM classes increased by 50 percent and the number of women by 50 percent. This was all while continuing in her role as wife to Eric and mother to her three children.
It was during this time that she and her sister also began to discuss creating a children’s book series, Little Honey’s Little Adventures. Her sister, Rachel Louise Eisenhauer would write the adventures, based on their own childhood adventures, and Tara would illustrate them.
Although Tara had started in college as an arts major, she had not created much art work in a very long time. In addition, Tara was classically trained in oils and her art was very realistic, she knew that wasn’t the right style for the series.
But Tara was up for the challenge. She refreshed her skills and began creating watercolor illustrations based on her sister’s writing. They now have a series of eight books which they sell through their website and at craft fairs. “It has been an amazing joy,” Tara said of working on this series with her sister.
Retirement from CCBC
In 2016, at the age of 61, Tara retired from her position at the CCBC after 35 years. “I was just ready for a change,” she said. But Tara was not content to relax in retirement. Instead, she took on the role as the Chair of the Baltimore County Democratic Party. Tara said she has always believed in public service and wanted to help facilitate change and make a difference. It became a full-time job. Her husband Eric Ebersole is also very involved in politics and serves in the Maryland House of Delegates.
Tara worked as the Chair for four years while still continuing to collaborate with her sister on the “Little Honey’s Little Adventure series.” She also continued with her other passion, music. Tara has played the drums in a number of bands through the years and is currently with Blues State, a band that plays at local events about six times a year.
Those who have seen Tara play know that she has a unique technique, she plays barefoot. “It’s easier for me to feel the rhythm of the music if I’m barefoot,” she explained.
However, Tara knew she was doing too much. After a minor car accident on the way to a gig, Tara realized that something had to give. She was working 40 hours a week as the Chair and practicing with the band every other week. “I was over the top with stress,” Tara said. Needing a change, she left her role as the Chair and took a hiatus from the band.
During this time, two things happened, COVID and grandchildren. Being quarantined at home, Tara learned the benefits of a slower lifestyle. She was meditating and taking the time in the morning to relax and have a cup of tea.
She also began helping take care of her grandchildren. When her daughters went back to work, they weren’t comfortable putting the kids in daycare, so Tara stepped in.
In 2021, with life beginning to return to normal, Tara started thinking about what she wanted to do next. She had learned the value of leading a less stressful life and wanted to continue her meditation and practicing yoga twice a week.
“I feel like I have just retired this year,” Tara said. “I’m beginning to find things that I want to do. It took me six years to realize this is my time. I have time to focus on me a little more”
Beginning a New Chapter
Tara had always thought about writing her own novel. She wanted to try her hand at adult fiction. Previously, all of Tara’s writing had been academic articles and her dissertation. That writing relied on fact, no emotion and no adjectives.
So, she began the process by taking an online writing class through CCBC and began reading books on writing. Her class, which she highly recommends, introduced her to an online community and helped inspire her to begin writing.
“Now it’s my turn to do some writing. I’m loving the process,” Tara said. Tara already knew the subject she wanted to tackle, corporal punishment. She had worked in the East Tennessee school system when she was first out of college where paddling was allowed. “I had some paddling stories to begin with and at no point did any of the paddling stories lead to better discipline,” Tara said. Although the book is fiction, she draws from some of her own experiences at that time. She says that writing the book has been cathartic as she deals with her role administering corporal punishment in the school system.
The working title of the book is, “A Broken Bit of Spirit.” Her goal is to bring a social issue to the discussion level. Corporal punishment is still allowed in 19 states. “I want readers to end the book thinking,” Tara said.
Tara has also started teaching classes for the CCBC SAIL (Senior Adventures in Learning) program. Tara started a class called Drums Alive. It is a program that uses large exercise balls and drumming techniques as a fitness class for people over 60. “I think that teaching drums to Seniors is the best thing for them because it is so low impact and yet it’s aerobic and it’s fun,” Tara said.
But Tara is only going to teach two sections of the class. At 67, she has learned the importance of life balance. “This is a brand new me and I’m experimenting,” Tara said.
Her Role Model
Tara was fortunate to have a role model for growing older gracefully. Her brother’s mother-in-law, Dominque, lives in Paris. At 92, she was still teaching gymnastics to seniors two days a week. “The seniors she taught became her friends. It really improved her social life,” Tara said. Dominque just retired at 94.
Tara said Dominque helped her realize how important it is to maintain and develop relationships as we age. That’s another reason Tara wants to teach the drumming classes, to make new social connections. “Interaction keeps you young. Exercise keeps you young. Independence keeps you young. Creativity keeps you young,” Tara said.
Growing Older
“Aging is a process we are not prepared for,” Tara said. “There’s a lot of loss along the way and there’s not a lot of preparation.”
“In fourth or fifth grade, we see a film to prepare us for becoming women. There’s not even a film to prepare us for getting older,” Tara said. Creating a class to help people with the aging process is next on her agenda.
“It’s a tough transition,” Tara said. She thinks there should be a greater acknowledgement about how difficult it can be. “It’s a massive transition in status from the phone beeping non-stop to that not happening anymore.”
“It’s not easy to make the transition and that’s ok.”
Life Is Great
Her advice to retirees, “The key to aging is just to continue to grow.”
Tara and her husband Eric
Although she is dealing with some health issues including thyroid issues and metabolic syndrome, she has been able to control these issues through diet, exercise and medication. “My health is better today than it was in 2016,” Tara said.
She takes time every day to de-stress and meditate and appreciate her life. “Whenever I go into my yoga position of gratitude, I am always thankful for my family. We have four wonderful grandchildren and three wonderful children.”
Tara’s favorite part of the day? “One of my very favorite things about being retired is that I can get up and fix myself a cup of tea, sit in a chair and drink it as slowly as I want to. I never grow tired of that.”
Embracing my retirement, I decided to take a trip to Costco with my husband Scott. Little did I know the adventure that awaited.
I must confess that I have been to Costco before. In February 2020, my husband, Scott, and I decided it was time to join a warehouse store. It turned out to be perfect timing. While others were experiencing a toilet paper shortage, we had bought so much on our first trip that we were even had a few extra rolls to share with our less fortunate neighbors when the pandemic hit.
Since then, I have only been to Costco a handful of times. When my husband retired, he took on the responsibility of grocery shopping. But now that I too am retired, I decided it was time to join him.
I could tell that we had different approaches right from the start. Scott said he wanted to start with a $1.59 hot dog from the concession stand so that he wouldn’t be tempted to over shop. I thought it sounded like a reasonable strategy, but I really don’t like hot dogs.
So, I went to grab a cart. Scott said we did that after the hot dog. I already had the cart in my hands and said. “That’s ok, I’ll get it.” The problem occur when I realized that the cart and I were on one side of the registers and the hot dogs were on the other side.
Scott gave me an “I told you so” look. I smiled and suggested that he get his hot dog and I browse since I hadn’t been there in such a long time. The look he gave me then could best be described as slightly fearful, but the hot dog was calling his name.
So, I wandered. For those who have never been to a Costco, it is truly an amazing place. Of course, I had seen the TVs before as I entered, but there were also mattresses, dining room tables, kayaks, lighting…really anything you can think of. I was mesmerized.
Next was the bakery, meats, cheeses and the first sample station. There was a young (well maybe not young), pleasant (well not unpleasant) woman giving out samples of tortellini. At Weight Watchers, they tell you to stay away from samples like this because the calories add up. But I truly felt I needed to indulge in order to actually embrace the entire experience. The tortellini was creamy and delicious.
Suddenly, my husband was next to me. I guess the hot dog needed some company, because he was also gnashing on some tortellini.
Then he looked at my cart. Apparently, on my journey through the store several items had jumped into the cart of their own volition. “I’ll go find the things that are actually on our list,” he said and picked up another tortellini.
I was somewhat surprised he trusted me to continue on my own. Instead of continuing to shop, I decided to follow the lead of a spry 70-year-old who was moving from tasting station to tasting station gathering his lunch. I could have done without the kombucha. It was like a fruit vinegar, but overall it was yummy and I wondered why my husband needed a hot dog with all this other yummy food around.
I caught up with my husband in the snack section. He had his phone out calling me. Apparently, he thought I was lost. I knew where I was. I was sampling cashews.
The best part about being retired is going to Costco during the week when no one else is around. Check out took no time at all.
But being retired, I had to hit the restrooms before we left. When I came out, my husband said he also needed to use the restroom. So I found a place to sit down and I waited.
“Is your membership on automatic renewal?” I heard someone say. I looked up and she. was talking to me. “Is your membership on automatic renewal?” she asked again.
“I’m not sure,” I said.
She took my receipt and said, “I can tell by your receipt.”
I wasn’t sure what this was all about being as unfamiliar as I am with the inner workings of Costco.
“Yes, it is,” she declared. “You get a free case of water.”
“Really,” I said. She put a sticker on it and motioned for me to pick up the 40 bottle case. Luckily, I workout.
Just then, my husband came running towards me. “What’s this? We don’t need any water,” he said. I felt like grandma being talked out of signing up for a timeshare.
The woman turned to him. “It’s free.”
“It’s free,” I said joyfully.
He still didn’t seem convinced, but I think the whole experience of having me along was more than he could handle and he just wanted to go home.
But I’m not sure why people think they save money going to Costco, I was surprised at how high our bill was.
Still, I got free water, free lunch and racked up a few thousand steps on my Fitbit. It was a win-win for me.
Since that trip, my Costco card seems to have disappeared and there have been no other invitations forthcoming to join him. Still, I think another trip is in my future. I hear that’s where all the cool retirees hang out.
If you have an idea for a blog subject, please email me at ksparis15@gmail.com
Dave was ready for a change. He made a decision to change his career which changed his life.
Even before the pandemic hit, Dave Stock knew it was time to change professions. He had been in the printing industry for almost 40 years and everything seemed routine. “It was like playing the same record over and over and over again,” Dave said.
Dave had seen a decline in the printing business over the past five years. More and more people were relying on digital rather than print. Then COVID hit. For a business that relied heavily on printed invitations, programs and other items for in-person events, COVID was devastating. “Printing is never going to go away, but it’s certainly not where it used to be,” Dave said.
“I felt like I was banging my head against the wall. I just didn’t have the same happiness,” Dave said.
However, printing was not Dave’s only job. Six years ago, Dave had taken on a part-time job at his neighborhood bike store, Race Pace. He and his wife, Madeline, had made cycling part of their daily life preferring to run their errands around Baltimore City on their bikes. He spent time at the store getting his bike serviced and buying accessories. When he saw they were hiring, he put in an application and was hired. At first, there wasn’t a position at Race Pace in Federal Hill, so he worked at the one in Ellicott City until a position closer to his home became available. That was about six months later.
While COVID hit the printing business hard, cycling experienced a resurgence. More people wanted to get outside and get exercise while confined during COVID. The bike store saw a huge increase in business and Dave was offered more hours.
In January 2022, Race Pace was bought out by Trek. During this transition, some executives from Trek visited the store and asked Dave if he would be interested in a full-time position “They said, have you ever thought about coming on board full-time. Let’s have a conversation,” Dave said. “We had the conversation and they gave me an opportunity.”
“I was on a sinking ship and saw a life raft and I took it,” Dave said.
But his decision wasn’t final until he discussed it with Madeline. They went away on vacation to discuss the move. “She said, ‘just do it. If it doesn’t work out. it doesn’t work out. I don’t want you to have any regrets,'” Dave said.
So, in April, Dave decided to retire from printing. “I don’t like to call it retiring,” Dave said. “I call it my next chapter.”
“I think of retirement as moving to Florida and doing water aerobics,” Dave said. At 58, he’s not ready for that.
So now, he is the Sales Manager for Trek Bicycle Federal Hill. His responsibilities include selling bikes and accessories, making sure goals are met and training new employees. “I answer to the Store Manager,” Dave said.
His typical day starts with having a cup of coffee with Madeline in their backyard. “I trying to get used to retail hours,” Dave said. He used to have to be to work at 9:00 in the morning and worked 5 days a week. Now, he goes to work around 10:30 a.m. and has off Tuesdays and Saturdays. The store is about half a mile from his house.
So he spends his morning going to the local coffee shop, meeting friends or going for a bike ride.
“The biggest change is the mindset,” Dave said. It’s been a total change in routine.
His work day starts with a “team huddle” where they go over what needs to be accomplished that day.
Dave says there is no typical customer. “We have everyone from advanced cyclists to people who haven’t ridden a bike since they were a kid.” Dave said. “It’s never the same.”
His favorite part of the job is helping customers. “There’s nothing like sending someone on a test drive and they come back with a smile they haven’t had since they were a kid. There’s such a sense of joy.” Dave said.
He feels that his job is guiding customers to the right bike. “Trek has a guide sales process. You are the guide and the customer is the hero.” Dave said. The sales person wants to help the customer have a safe enjoyable experience on a bike.
Ride bikes. Be happy. Have fun. is Trek’s motto.
The most challenging part of his new life is learning a whole new industry. He has always been in sales, but bikes are a whole different product.
The bike business has changed now that people are getting out more. Customers are now looking to upgrade their bikes, service their bikes and buy accessories. He said they don’t see as many people coming in for their first bikes.
However, there is a growing interest in e-bikes, electric bikes. Dave said e-bikes are really making a big surge. “Trek is coming out with some more affordable models,” Dave said. He adds that that Trek is also coming out with a commuter e-bike.
Riding in Baltimore City
Dave says it’s a misconception that the city is a difficult place to ride a bike. “There are many bike friendly roads and bike lanes,” Dave said.”The city is quite easy to navigate on a bike.” In addition, Baltimore City is working on a biking infrastructure, according to Dave.
“I love the freedom of riding my bike,” Dave said. “You see a heck of a lot more from a bike than you do from a car.”
Part of Dave’s job is to lead a Sunday bike ride at 9:00 a.m. through Baltimore City. It’s called the “Causal Shop Ride”. “It’s slow pace. It’s causal. We stop along the way if someone wants to stop,” Dave said. Right now there are only half a dozen people, but he is hoping to grow that number.
Changes in His Relationship
Dave said his relationship with Madeline has changed “exponentially”. “We were both going through some big changes and I wasn’t happy,” Dave said. She would say “Where is the man that I married?”
Now she says, “You’re happy. I have my husband back.”
They have been married for almost 12 years. “She always has my back,” Dave said.
Financially Speaking
Although Dave’s job may sound like all fun and games, he had to consider whether or not this job made sense financially. “I looked at my finances and knew how much I needed to make,” Dave said. He has been able to meet those goals and is even doing better than he did working in printing.
“My wife and I had a big conversation before I left, but it was about so much more than money, it was about happiness,” Dave said.
“We know what we can afford. We don’t live with extravagances. We live a very simple life.”
They have paid off their home in Baltimore and have an investment property in Florida. Due to COVID, they have not been able to rent it out, but now they are hoping to rent it to traveling nurses.
Health Care
For Dave, his health care situation has actually improved. “TREK provides tremendous health care,” Dave said. In his previous job, he carried he and Madeline on his health care plan, since she is a solopreneur, so good health care was important. “TREK health care is very similar to what I had before.”
In addition, he and Madeline make sure to lead a healthy lifestyle. In fact, since his career change, he has lost 15 pounds. He has more time to eat healthy rather than picking up fast food. “I used to be on the road and it was just easier to pick up a cheeseburger,” Dave said. Now he’s moving more and eating regularly. He has even seen a reduction in his blood pressure.
Future Plans
Dave is not sure what his future holds. “I’ll probably always work doing something. I need that interaction with other people,” Dave said. “I thrive off of that.”
Because TREK is a large organization with stores all over the United States, there is the ability to move to another state and stay with the organization. He keeping all his options open.
Final Words of Advice
Dave’s advice. “Just do it. Don’t be afraid. Fear can be crippling,” However, he also recommends doing your research to make sure it’s the right decision for you.
Dave’s Sunday Morning Ride
Even though Dave is no longer involved with printing, he stays on top of what is going on and is proud of the contribution he made. “I feel like a did something good in the industry. Sometimes I thought I didn’t make that much of a difference, but based on the response on Facebook, I obviously did,” Dave said. Dave was flooded with well wishes when he announced his “next chapter.”
“I saw my father work himself to death. I don’t want to just work for the sake of working. I want to work doing something I’m enjoying,” Dave said.
“I enjoy learning something new every day,” Dave said.
If you need a new bike, make sure to stop by and see Dave at the Trek Bicycle Federal Hill store. You’ll make his day.
If you know someone who would make a good subject for this blog, please email me at ksparis15@gmail.com.
Now that I am officially retired, it’s time to figure out what I want to do when I grow up.
My husband and I started talking about my retirement over two years ago. He left his job and we began to envision what the rest of our lives would look like. Now, we have the freedom to find out.
I never thought I would feel comfortable with the word retirement. Retirement bring about images of water aerobics and 5:00 dinners. Not that there’s anything wrong with that, but it’s not me. So I decided to embrace the word and give it a refreshed image. I’m in marketing, we’re all about re-imagining.
Two years ago, my husband and I started to prepare for my retirement and the next phase of our lives.
The first thing we did was sell my little Volkswagon Beetle convertible. I had it for over seven years and I loved it, but it was not a car we could travel around the country in. I was surprised how many people were sad when I sold my car. I admit, it was a hoot to drive, but an SUV was more practical. So, we bought a Mazda CX-5 and paid it off before I left.
The added benefit was that since it looks like every other car on the road, I had to learn my license plate.
Then we made sure to max out my 401K contributions. Sure the car payments and 401K contributions significantly cut down our monthly cash flow, but it was worth it. We knew it would help us create the life we wanted in the future.
I started noticing what other people were doing in retirement. That’s when I started my blog. I wanted to find out the path people took and why they made the decisions they made.
I’ve been so much fun telling people’s stories. Each one is so unique and each one helps me to put a piece in my own retirement puzzle. I’m not even sure what the end picture will be.
When people ask me what I was going to do in retirement, I say I going to drink lemonade and read books in the backyard. And I am. But I am also looking at all the opportunities available to me.
For example, I have been creating videos for people and businesses. These have been fun projects. I not only love helping people celebrate special events, but I also love the creative process of combining video, pictures and music.
I also have a podcasting gig. More about that later.
And finally, I am doing all the projects that I have been thinking about doing for years. My husband is already threatening to take away my coffee if I don’t settle down.
And I’m sure I will. It’s strange to think that I don’t have to fit everything I want to do into a weekend or an occasional day off. That I don’t have to sit in traffic worrying that I will be late to work or a meeting. I have time.
The most important thing I have learned from all my interviewees is that to have a successful retirement you have to find your passion. I’m working on that too.
For now, I will continue to find people who are working on their next chapter whether it be through love, work, moving or volunteering. I hope you will continue to join me.
As always, if you know someone who would make a good subject for me blog, email me at ksparis15@gmail.com.
Brian is rolling down the highway in retirement, but he’s doing it in a school bus filled with children. Find out why he’s loving his new career.
When Brian Carr retired at 64 from Bloomberg Bureau of National Affairs (now Bloomberg Industry Group) in Washington D.C., he had no plans to drive a school bus. Originally, Brian wanted to concentrate on his music. An accomplished guitarist, Brian planned to focus on playing, singing and writing music, but he missed a daily routine and decided it was time to go back to work. “I got antsy and missed structure in my life,” Brian said.
But driving a bus was not his first job after retirement. Instead, he took a sales job at Bill’s Music in Catonsville, MD. Brian was able to talk to other musicians, help them find what they needed and still find time to play the guitar. “After years of playing in bands, I knew a lot about sound systems, microphones and other musical things,” Brian said.
It was a very different job than his one in Washington D.C. where he spent his days writing and editing legal publications, but it was a perfect fit for his retirement. He loved demonstrating the different guitars and working with the customers and the Bill’s team.
Brian worked there for four and a half years until COVID hit. Then, Bill’s music, like many other businesses, shut down and Brian and his wife Dottie, who also worked at Bill’s scheduling lessons, were laid off. When Bill’s began opening again with limited hours, Brian was not one of the employees brought back and he knew he had to find something different. “I didn’t like being unemployed, it was like being retired again,” Brian said.
He started looking at the Woodlawn Motor Coach because it was close to his house and they were always advertising for drivers. He put in an application and was hired.
So why bus driving? “I don’t know. I like to drive. I just thought it was something I would like to try,” Brian said. “For a post retirement part-time job, it pays $22.50 and hour and is going up in September to $25.”
The bus company put Brian through a four-week training program. Before he finished his training, he had to take and pass the permit test at the Department of Motor Vehicles. It was a three-part test. Brian passed and was ready to hit the road.
Brian had a choice between school bus driving and charter driving. He decided to take the school bus driving because it was more consistent, but he will still sometimes pick up charter work such as taking high school athletic teams to events.
Brian begins his day at 5:30 a.m. when he arrives at the bus yard. He isn’t expected until 5:45 a.m., but he likes to get there early to get a jump on the day and to make sure no kids are left standing outside too long.
However, when he first started, he arrived early because he was concerned about getting lost.
“The first time I went to Lansdowne I drove right by the high school,” Brian said. “Then to find a place to turn around you have to go a couple miles. It’s not like driving a car.”
His bus is 35 feet long and weighs over 12 tons. “It’s a very nice bus, with good equipment,” Brian said. There’s power steering, cruise control and a powerful braking system “There are seven very large mirrors so you can not only see behind the bus, in front of the bus, the sides of the bus as well the full interior,” Brian said.
There’s also a PA system. “So, you can tell your passengers to quiet down or not eat on the bus,” Brian said.
He starts the day on the beltway going up to a local high school and transports those students to a magnet school. Then he picks up another group there and transports them to a technical high school.
After the initial “shuttle bus” runs, he begins transporting kids from their neighborhood stops to a middle school and then he delivers children to two separate elementary schools. “Those little kids are so adorable,” Brian said.
He’s back home by 9:30 a.m. and then starts afternoon pick up by reporting back to the bus lot at 1:45 p.m. for his first pick up at 2:20 p.m. Then he’s back at the lot at 4:30 p.m., cleans the bus, completes some paperwork and heads home.
In between his morning and afternoon runs, Brian runs errands and takes care of doctor’s appointments. He also makes sure to walk his dog. “He needs it and so do I,” Brian said.
“I was pleased with my assignment because I know this area very well,” Brian said.
Now that he’s finished his first year, he’s ready to go back for a second year. This summer he volunteered to drive for a local summer camp. He said it’s much different than driving during the school year. One big difference is that during the summer there are counselors on the bus that help with bus management. During the school year, Brian is not only responsible for driving, but also for maintaining discipline on the bus.
Health Care
At 71, Brian has no issues with health care. He is not only covered by Medicare, but also has great supplemental insurance from his previous employer, Bloomberg.
But that doesn’t mean that Brian has been taking his health for granted. Driving the bus has made Brian much more aware of his health. Commercial drivers must pass a Department of Transportation annual physical. There are rigorous standards that drivers have to meet.
For example, if a driver’s neck measurement is more than 17 inches, he/she must be tested for possible sleep apnea. If you have sleep apnea then you have to get on a CPAP machine.
Knowing that his neck was larger than that, Brian decided it was time to lose weight and get in better shape. He has lost approximately 50 pounds through intermittent fasting and maintaining a low carb diet. He’s also become more active and is riding his bike to work. “My A1C went down from 7.3 to 5.4,” Brian said.
His bike riding has the added benefit of saving on gas and allowing he and his wife to become a one car family.
Outside work
Brian and his wife Dottie are enjoying spending time together and she has even started working at the bus company as well. She isn’t a driver, but instead works in the front office doing contract work. However, they have always worked at the same company Dottie worked for Bloomberg as well as Bill’s music.
Brian has not given up on his music. Brian practices at least an hour a day. He plays with the band Blues State who has local gigs and also performs at the Catonsville Sunday Farmer’s Market with Marcus Austin.
Future
Brian has found that he really likes driving. “I love it. I wish I had started doing it sooner.”
“I’ll probably drive for the next ten years,” Brian said. However, he may not keep up his current rigorous schedule for that long. The bus company also has options for drivers to choose daily charter trips to offer more flexibility. “Working just makes me feel better,” Brian said.
If you know someone you think would make a good subject for my blog email me at ksparis15@gmail.com.
I’ve met so many interesting people while writing my blog. I just wanted to catch up with a few of them. Here’s a quick update.
When I first started my blog, I spent a great deal of time coaxing and cajoling my friends to be part of my “project”. Now that I have published over 18 blogs, I thought it was a great time to check in with some of my earlier blog participants. I’m happy to say, they are doing great!
A New Start After Walmart
You might remember that Bert decided that staying home during the pandemic was not working for him. He was spending too much time in his basement eating and drinking too much and wasting a lot of time. After a year at Walmart, Bert decided it was time to move on and started a Human Service Counseling Certificate Program at CCBC last fall. With this certificate from the state, Bert can work as a drug and alcohol counselor.
Being over 60, Bert was able to take advantage of the free tuition at CCBC. “I only pay about $200 a class,” Bert said.
So far, Bert has completed 15 credits which allows him to work as a drug and alcohol counselor trainee and is enrolled during the summer session. He proudly states that he has 4.0 GPA.
Through CCBC, he was able to get an interview at Hope’s Horizon in Parkville. After the interview, he was hired on the spot and will be working there part-time while continuing to go to school.
Hope’s Horizon is a treatment facility offering rehab and intensive outpatient therapy. He will be working with groups of men, approximately 80-100 men in all. He will be responsible for creating treatment programs and mediating group sessions. “I’m excited to get started,” Bert said. “Three years ago, I couldn’t imagine being here.”
Now, Bert feels he is on the right track and is looking forward to finishing up his certificate program in about 2 years.
When Janet Streit entered her supervisor’s office in March 2022, she was told she was being let go. Although it was somewhat unexpected, Janet faced this setback with the same positive attitude she faced everything. After determining she would be ok financially, she started on a plan for her new life.
Janet knew that her new life would include helping others live their best life. During the pandemic, she accomplished her goal of losing 70 pounds with Weight Watchers and wanted to help others.
After being retired for a few months, Janet put in her application to become a coach leading meetings. Now, she’s happy to announce, she got the job and is ready to help others on their weight loss journey with her amazing talent to take any recipe and make it “points friendly”.
Janet also shared during her blog post that she wanted to take a trip to the Adirondacks with her brother. Well, as you can see by the pictures, she made it. Being 70 pounds less, Janet is finding it easier to walk and hike the trails, but at the end of the day, it’s still exhausting.
Geoff Prior was one of my very first blogs. After a long career in IT, Geoff decided to take to the open road and started traveling around the United States in his van. While traveling, he started taking pictures. His pictures have now won awards and he is getting better every day using his natural talent with new equipment and new techniques.
This summer Geoff wanted to cross something off his bucket list. He is driving to Alaska from Maryland. Along the way, he has had company. His daughter has been his companion for part of the trip. They have been exploring Alaska together since June 17th.
Geoff’s pictures are amazing and his eye for capturing the perfect moment gets better and better. If you want to see more of his pictures go to GRPImagery.com
Donna found herself through her solo travels. Find our more about her journey.
Donna Keel Armer considers herself a late bloomer. She enrolled as a college freshman at 33, took her first solo trip to Italy at 67 and published her first book, Solo in Salento: A Memoir, at 75. “I had to make up for lost time,” she said during our recent interview.
Donna Keel Armer
Donna grew up in a traditional family where the one goal in life was to marry and have children. “I made a mess of that,” she said.
Her first marriage at 19 was a disaster, and she was divorced within two years. “I had such a sense of failure, yet I still retained the antiquated notion of marriage as my only option.”
The second marriage to a much older man, who was an alcoholic, turned abusive. But with one divorce under her belt, she felt compelled to make it work.
“I hung in that dreadful environment for eleven years,” Donna said. “I was raised in a fundamentalist household, divorce was not an option, and I now had two strikes against me. My family wasn’t exactly understanding.”
After her second divorce, she changed her focus and entered college as a thirty-three year old freshman with a double major in Psychology and Social Sciences. “I thought maybe I could sort myself out with a degree in Psychology, but it took a lot more work than a degree to do that.”
After graduating, Donna went to work first in the insurance industry and then the airline industry and rose through the ranks to become a Senior Director. At the same time, she began to repair her personal life and decided third time’s a charm when she met and married Ray. They will celebrate forty years in 2023. “He’s just a gem and we have so much in common.”
Donna and Ray in Murano, Italy May 2022.
After retiring from corporate America, Ray and Donna opened a restaurant and catering service. “It was the hardest work I’ve ever done,” Donna said. But she loved the business, particularly the catering part. “I loved the intimate nature of catering and the pleasure it gave me to create celebratory events for people Even catering a funeral offered us a chance to take care of people so they didn’t have to worry.” Donna said. “It was rewarding.”
Not only did catering feed Donna’s passion for food and cooking, but she also learned a lot about herself. “One of the unexpected ministries we encountered came about when the first big hurricane hit the East Coast. Because we were on the evacuation route, we housed and fed people who were fleeing the storm. There were many unique experiences like this that helped me as a person. It taught me to listen to other people’s stories and be compassionate.”
In 2006, after 10 years, Donna and Ray sold the business and moved closer to family. But after leaving home when she was nineteen, Donna didn’t experience the relationship with her family that she had hoped for. In fact, issues from the past surfaced which created more pain and angst and much of the personal repair work she’d completed, fell into disrepair.
During this time, Donna made progress in one area of her life. She had wanted to pursue writing since she was seven but allowed the influence of others to direct her life’s choices. At sixty, she began to write articles for local magazines.
Making the Decision to Travel Solo
In 2012, Donna again felt that sense of desperation about her life. She knew that she truly hadn’t put aside much of her previous garbage and she had taken on more. She told Ray she wanted to to go away alone and sort through the bits and pieces of her life that were unraveling. “He was very understanding,” Donna said. “We have always been respectful of one another’s choices.”
Donna choose a small town in the region of Puglia in Italy for her solo trip. She and Ray had visited the town in 2010 and Donna had been drawn to the ancient walled village and the warrior woman overlooking the harbor.
Statute of warrior woman guarding the harbor.
Ray’s only request was they spend time together in Italy. And he wanted to check out the apartment she’d rented before he left her on her own. They flew over together to visit friends in Umbria. Then they drove Puglia. “He said he wanted to be able to picture in his mind where I was and that I was safe,” Donna said. “That’s what I love about him.”
When Ray left, Donna had mixed emotions. “As I watched him drive away I was sobbing.” But the sun was shining and the children were playing in piazza. She grabbed a gelato and headed to her new home for the next five weeks. “I put that key in the door and thought yeah. I felt so empowered,” Donna said.
This was the beginning of major healing for Donna. “Just as I learned to create a work of art from broken pieces in a week-long mosaics class I took, I began to put the fragments of my fractured life into a whole,” Donna said. This trip was the impetuous for her book, Solo in Salento: A Memoir. “In this tiny village full of mystery, martyrs, and music, I found my voice,” Donna said.
Mosaic Donna created during her class.
Life After Italy
She returned to the United States feeling renewed. But it was a crash-landing as shortly after her return, her sister was diagnosed with ovarian cancer. Donna assumed the role of caretaker until her sister’s death eight months later.
After her sister’s death, Donna and Ray moved to the small town of Beaufort, South Carolina. “Beaufort is a haven for writers and artists. I blossomed as a writer, and I found a niche for myself when I began to volunteer at the Pat Conroy Literary Center,” she said.
She also joined a writing group. “That’s where I met my writing mentor,” Donna said. Each member is required to share something they had written for critique. Donna presented an essay called “The Last Supper.” (Now chapter 45 in her book.) It was about the last meal she had during her solo journey to Otranto. “That trip changed my life, and I needed to share that story of healing.”
The group told her that she needed to write her whole story about her solo trip. Prior to that Donna hadn’t considered writing a book, but encouraged by the group, she began to write her memoir.
A Personal Memoir
Although her book details the beauty of Italy, generosity of the Italian people, and delicious cuisine, it is more than a travel guide. It is about one woman’s journey to find her voice. She talks about her life, her marriages, and how traveling alone gave her the gift of healing.
“I took time to recycle my own trash and to piece the fragmented parts of my life together,” Donna said. Both mosaics and recycling trash figure metaphorically in the memoir.
“Prior to my trip, I’d always done things that I thought other people imagined I should be doing. I learned I didn’t have to do that. I could be whomever I wanted to be. Now I’m a writer. It’s a dream come true,” Donna said. “I hope it’s an inspiration to others. It’s important to sweep away the parts of your life that incumber you and to seek a joyful way of living your life fully and completely.”
When the book was published, Donna was surprised to hear from many woman who had also been married numerous times. They shared their stories of shame and pain and thanked her for the possibility of taking a different path.”
In September at age 77, Donna is marking a new milestone. Her book is being translated into Italian. Un’Americana in Salento and her Italian book launch is scheduled for September 3, 2022 in the village of Otranto.
Donna and her husband Ray continue to travel. This year they spent a month in Italy and a month in Slovenia. She had planned to celebrate a solo trip for her 75th birthday, but then COVID hit. However, when her book is launched in September, she will be going solo. “It’s such a freeing experience. I wish everyone had the opportunity,” Donna said.
Advice About Traveling Alone
Donna knows that some women are reluctant to travel alone. Although she had traveled alone in her corporate career, her personal solo traveling is very different. She is always aware of her safety no matter where she is. “I just think it’s smart to be prepared. Before I go, I research the location of the police station and the hospital. I always have emergency numbers in my purse as well as the number for the American Embassy,” Donna said.
She’s also learned it’s important to strike up a friendship with a local person. This gesture establishes a link with someone who can help her with the language or other problems that might arise.
“I think you have to have a brave heart to travel alone. But I think just living you have to have a brave heart,” Donna said.
Food and Wine
You can’t talk about Italy without talking about food. “I’m partial to the Southern part of Italy because I prefer tomato sauces over cream sauces. And the seafood on the Adriatic is superb.”
Donna not only enjoys eating in Italy, but she loves cooking as well. “Everywhere I go I ask a local person to teach me how to make a local dish,” Donna said.
Arancini
Last time she learned to make arancini, a rice ball stuffed with a meat ragú, green peas and mozzarella cheese, rolled in egg and bread crumbs and then fried. “They are so delicious with the gooey cheese melting in your mouth when you take a bite.”
She now wants to learn to make a tiramisu she had in Sicily. Donna described her favorite as a unique round-shaped cake shell. “When you cut into it, a thick chocolate sauce, thick caramel sauce and thick pastry cream oozed out. I’m a real sweet lover,” Donna said.
“But then, there’s hardly anything in the food category that I don’t love,” Donna laughed.
And the wine! Donna and her husband are mostly red wine drinkers. “The reds in the Southern region are so gorgeous and intense. There is a really distinct flavor to the grape that has almost a raisiny after taste. They’re delicious.”
Finding Time to Heal
Donna knows that her solo trip to Otranto helped make her the person she is today. “You don’t have to go to Italy to start the process. Start small. Carve out the time for yourself to be alone with your thoughts,” Donna said. “Learn to like yourself as a person. It’s so critical. In Italian they use the word essere which means to be. Americans are such busy people, always doing instead of being. Learn to be.”
What’s next for Donna? She’s writing a mystery series that is currently in the submission process. The series features Cat Gabbiano a Lowcountry caterer who embarks on a trip to Italy when her best friend goes missing from a small town in Puglia. Donna continues to submit travel essays and writes a travel blog when she’s on the road.
In 2019, after almost 19 years working for the Baltimore County Public School (BCPS) System, Janice Seville-Schwartz was ready to retire from her job as Paraeducator working with autistic students. She knew the time was right.
Janice, Don and Tob
Her husband. Don, had previously retired from BCPS as an elementary school teacher and was working as a school crossing guard while Janice finished out her career.
They had planned retire in 2020, but an inheritance allowed them to retire a year early.
They actually started talking about retirement in 2014. Although they considered many options, North Carolina seemed like a good fit because Don’s brother and several of their friends lived there.
A friend recommended that they look at Asheville, North Carolina. So, Janice and Don planned a trip down south to look around. Halfway through the trip Janice’s step-son called to ask how things were going. “It’s a nice place to visit, but it was too busy, I was looking for a small town,” Janice said.
He suggested they go 20 miles down the road to Hendersonville, North Carolina. Janice said, “We got to main street and I thought ‘this is where I want to be.'”
It was a smaller town, but still close to Asheville. “It was Ellicott City and Catonsville rolled into one,” Janice said. (Janice and Don had been living in Catonsville, MD which is just up the road from Ellicott City.)
I wanted shops, restaurants, things to do but in a small town atmosphere. “It was as though some course was guiding us here,” Janice said.
Of course, that was only one day, but they knew they wanted to return. A year later they returned and spent a week there participating in town activities and attending a local festival. Then they started driving around and looking at different neighborhoods.
As part of their adventures, they followed a sign that read, “Bat Cave” and decided to explore. There actually was a bat cave that was closed. Instead, they discovered a development being built in the middle of farm lands and apple orchards. It was an idyllic spot.
They weren’t quite ready to purchase, but a year later in 2016, they bought a lot and began dreaming about their new life in Hendersonville.
Each year, they kept visiting and every time they returned home Janice thought. “I wish we didn’t have to leave.”
Preparing for Retirement
In 2018, they spoke to their financial advisors. Don was ready to leave the school system. But when Janice and Don first spoke to their financial advisors. they recommended that they not retire. “They didn’t think we had enough to live off in retirement,” Janice said. “But we just didn’t listen to them. Life is too short.” Janice had learned that lesson when her sister passed away at 58.
So, Don retired in 2018 and Janice had planned to continue working for two more years. However, in 2019, Janice inherited money from relatives. That’s when she knew it was time to leave. She finished out the school year, they sold their home and the day after school let out, they moved down to North Carolina to oversee the building of their new home.
Building Their New Home
Once they were in North Carolina, work started on the house in October 2019. They lived in a 700-foot apartment during construction. They knew they could handle that small space for a short period of time, but then COVID hit.
Their new home in Hendersonviille.
They got an email from the builder who wasn’t sure they were going to be able to continue work on the house. It was a question of getting workers and supplies.
“That was an interesting time,” Janice said. “We were just starting to meet people and then suddenly it was just Don and myself in a 700 square foot apartment. On the good side, we started exploring the area. We had to get out of the apartment every day, it was like an adventure.”
Luckily, the work was able to continue. The workers wanted to work so building began, but there were restrictions. One restriction was that Janice and Don couldn’t be at the house while the workers were there.
So, they would go over after the workers were gone. Because this was a total build, they wanted to closely monitor the progress. “We picked out everything,” Janice said. She even found the floor plan for the house online.
Because this was their forever home, the builder made sure it ADA (American Disabilities Act) complaint. The whole house is accessible. The hallways are wide enough for a wheelchair, its all one level and the shower has no doors and is curb-less.
Life In Hendersonville
“Our kids say to us ‘Why do you do so much,” Janice said. “‘What do you want us to do, sit around doing nothing,'” she responds.
“There’s so much to do here.” Janice said they go hiking, frequent the local breweries and wineries, and take our visitors to visit places like the Biltmore and she is even working at the visitors center.
In addition, they have joined a local church down in Hendersonville and have found it was a great way to meet people and make friends. One day, Janice and Don showed up for an open meeting and everyone was wondering who they were. “They smelled young blood,” Janice chuckled.
Don is now very involved volunteering with the church. He also volunteers with the North Carolina Cooperative Extension, which does a wide variety of agricultural projects including growing experimental apples. Henderson County is the Apple Capital of North Carolina. Don goes there once a week to volunteer and has even learned how to drive a tractor. Don also volunteers at a local historic site helping with school field trips. He helps the Henderson theater by building sets and running lights. “He’s gone every day,” Janice said.
Starting a New Job
Janice started volunteering at the local visitors center in 2020. The Center closed down from March to August due to COVID, but then she returned to work under strict COVID protocols.
Special visitors (her grandkids) surprising her at the visitors center.
Janice said working there has been a real learning experience. “There were a lot of things I didn’t know,” said Janice, “like how to give directions.” But slowly she began to learn and started working more hours. In October 2021, the director asked her if she would be willing to work part-time. Janice agreed, but only if she could continue attending her monthly Daughters of the American Revolution (DAR) meetings and have flexibility to take off to travel. They agreed.
Now, Janice and Don use the extra money to go out to dinner and it even helped pay for a Girls Trip to Puerto Rico.
Retirement Life
The hardest part is being away from family and friends. Ironically, many people from their home town of Catonsville are moving to Hendersonville. A total of seven so far.
The best part of retirement according to Janice is the freedom. “I feel relaxed and I feel empowered. I don’t care what people think of me,” Janice said. She finds herself being more assertive in her new life. “I do things for myself.”
janice having fun at work learning about the llama farm.
Another benefit is Janice said she and Don have never been closer. Although, there is someone else who is competing for her attention these days.
They have adopted Toby, a mini Bernedoodle puppy. Janice said they bought their dog from an ethical breeder who requires documentation that they will have him neutered and that they will never put him in a shelter. She felt good about adopting him because the money the breeder makes goes to a charity for enslaved children.
Finances and Health Care
One of the reasons they have had such a good retirement was planning. Both Janice and Don receive a pension through Baltimore County. In addition, now that Don is 65, he is taking is social security and is covered by Medicare.
She used the money she inherited from her mother to pay down debt and the money she inherited from her uncle helped pay for the house. “I really think you need to be debt free to retire,” Janice said.
Janice is still covered through Don’s Baltimore County health insurance. Good health insurance was particularly important to Janice because in 2015 she was diagnosed with MGUS (monoclonal gammopathy of unknown significance), a non-cancerous condition where the body makes an abnormal protein, called a paraprotein. It can be a pre-cursor to blood cancer and Janice is being monitored by a hematologist. The healthcare here is really wonderful here,” Janice said. There are two hospitals right near by.
Final Advice
Janice and Don had been planning for their retirement since 2014. “Make a plan, but be flexible. Things can change.”
She also recommends getting a clear idea of where you want to live. Janice knew exactly what she wanted in the place they were going to retire to, even if at first she didn’t know exactly where that place was. “Decide what environment you want to live in,” Janice said. “Some people I have spoken to who have retired to the beach are now ready to leave,”
“Life is an adventure. Keep busy,” Janice said. Words Janice and Don seem to live by.
If you know someone who you think would be a good subject for this blog, email me: ksparis15gmail.com.
Cindy wasn’t looking for love, but it found her in the small town of Milton, PA.
When Cindy DeGroat moved to the small town of Milton, Pennsylvania, falling in love was the last thing on her mind.
After 25 years as a Baltimore County Public School teacher, Cindy turned 62, submitted her retirement papers on February 1, 2019 and moved two weeks later. Having divorced her husband, she left Baltimore to be closer to her sister. Cindy was fairly familiar with the area and had friends that lived nearby. It seemed like the perfect choice.
Cindy started her new life by puppy-sitting and then welcoming her first grandchild in May. Following the birth, she applied for background clearances and began substitute teaching.
Cindy split her time between Milton and Springfield, Massachusetts where her daughter lived.
She and her sister were anticipating a trip to Italy in 2021.
Retirement was going just as Cindy had planned.
The Meet Cute
Matt Farrand first noticed Cindy when they were swimming laps together at the Milton YMCA. He knew right away there was something special about her.
Matt started talking to Cindy in the pool but just as they were beginning to move from small talk, life got in the way. Matt’s dad passed and Cindy’s second grandchild was born so neither one was able to spend much time at the Y the summer of 2021.
“I thought ‘C’est la vie,’” Matt said. “It was nice chatting with you, if only for a little bit.”
But not long afterwards, Saturday, August 21 Matt saw Cindy at a 5K race at Milton State Park. She was wearing a hat that read Guanajuato, Mexico. Matt’s family had spent six months there while his dad, a college professor, was on sabbatical in the 1960s. Matt went over and struck up a conversation. They consider that their anniversary date.
Getting Acquainted
What Cindy remembered most from their previous time in the pool was that they both wore orange swim caps. What Matt remembered were her flip turns.
“I was very aware of Miss Cindy,” he said with a smile. “Her flip turns are a thing of beauty.”
Now on dry land, they decided to get to know each other better. As the race was getting ready to start, Matt said he had pictures of Guanajuato to show her. Cindy gave him her phone and told him to put in his contact information and she would call him.
Cindy called him later that night and they set up a time to meet that Sunday.
“I told him I was a Christian and I was going to church and we could meet after church,” Cindy said.
Matt asked, “What can I bring?” That impressed Cindy right off the bat. She said she wasn’t used to someone taking her needs into consideration.
Long out of the dating scene, Cindy was cautious about the meeting. She set up the meeting at the park, in public and drove her own vehicle.
The first date was during the height of the pandemic and Matt took the time to wipe down the old wooden bench before they sat down on it. “I was guffawing,” Cindy said. “Who takes the time to wipe down an old wooden bench?”
“It had bird poop on it,” Matt said.
The romantic atmosphere was subdued by the bug spray she wore and the drizzling rain that chased them into his car, according to Cindy. However, she left feeling hopeful.
After that first date, they spent a lot of time talking on the phone.
“I dumped all my dirty laundry on him,” Cindy said. She told him about her life, her marriage and her time in Maryland.”
Matt said he opened up too.
“I just knew, this girl’s really something,” Matt said. “I can’t let this one get away.”
Navigating Life
Matt was still working full-time. During the week he is a reporter for a local newspaper and on Saturdays he sells athletic shoes and apparel. Sunday was the only day they could spend together.
Cindy is enjoying retirement life while Matt is rethinking his future plans. He sees himself entering a new work phase in 2023.
Love and Marriage?
Matt has never been married and has no children although he has been in other long-term relationships.
“I am facing new horizons with as open a mind as I can,” Matt said. “Cindy has introduced me to things I wanted to happen 25 years ago, but I didn’t have the courage or the circumstances to make those changes.”
“He’s talking good food and church activities,” Cindy piped in.
They have joined Christ Wesleyan Church, which is considerably bigger than the town of Milton where they live. They have been taking relationship classes with the church to help them develop as a couple.
“We have also joined “Best Years Fellowship”, a 55+ group, that has monthly activities,” Cindy said.
How is dating different after 60? Neither of them were big daters in high school, but they said now they feel like they’re 14 again.
“We laugh a lot,” Cindy said.
“We have a lot of PG fun. ‘Cindy and Matt go to the malt shop’,” Matt added.
“He treats me exceptionally well,” said Cindy, which is different from her previous relationships.
“I have never been happier,” Matt said.
“Back in the day, it was one date, a cup of coffee and back in the sack you go,” Matt quipped. Now he says he is being true to himself and focused on building a strong relationship. “My awareness at 65 is so much better as is what I value”.
“We both know ourselves and what we like and don’t like,” Cindy said. After taking a relationship test, the counselor told them they were a “vitalized couple.”
Everyone is asking when they are getting married. “People are sensing and seeing something,” Cindy said. Their mentor couple said they just love being around them.
Matt says he does have a timeline in mind. Although never married he said, “I know I have it in me.”
In addition to their commitment to each other, they are committed to fitness. They work out 6 to 7 days a week. They both walk and swim. Matt is also a runner and a cyclist.
Cindy says, “He has titanium legs and he loves my titanium arms.” Cindy says that the wedding ring might be titanium.
Family Concerns
Like many people with grown children, Cindy’s children were apprehensive about mom’s new relationship.
Cindy waited before telling her kids. In addition to the usual concerns, Cindy has mixed race children so it was important to her that her significant other be fully accepting of them.
“I knew I wanted someone who was not just going to pretend to be OK with it,” she explained.
Cindy checked out his LP collection and saw he had many black artists including Hip Hop and Soul artists from his many years as a DJ. In fact, they had many of the same albums. In addition, Matt was well acquainted with civil rights and black history. “He’s not just someone who merely co-exists with minorities,” Cindy said.
In fact, one of the first questions both kids asked was, “Is he Caucasian?” When Cindy said he was, Matt asked, “Is that a good thing or not?”. It must have been because they approved.
Advice for Those Looking for Love
“Be happy with yourself first,” Cindy said. Matt sensed what could for once in his life work out.
“I kind of conjured up Cindy,” he said. He wanted someone who was about his age, fit, ‘wearing the same color tie on election day’, a non-smoker and cute. ”Five out of five,” he said. “I won the lottery.”
She’s also a good cook, as is Matt. “That’s a bonus,” Cindy said.
If you know someone who you think would make a good subject for my blog, send me an email at ksparis15@gmail.com.
Ken Fellman knew he wanted to retire early. Now, he is living “The Summer of Ken” and loving it!
Ken Fellman always knew he wanted to retire early. Watching his father pass away at 62 from cancer deeply affected him. “I don’t know how many years God has for me here,” Ken said.
So, after nearly 40 years in banking, he left his position as Senior Vice President of Consumer Banking, turned in his retirement papers and began “The Summer of Ken,” he said with a broad smile.
He considers it a “redeployment rather than a retirement” because he knows there is more for him to do. But for now, he’s spending time with his family, pursuing his hobbies (hiking, biking, and camping) and learning Spanish.
Ken has a deep commitment to learning Spanish and spends 2-3 hours a day practicing. He even has a tutor 3 times a week. He isn’t sure what is driving his passion to learn Spanish, but it began when he was traveling. “My whole family speaks Spanish and I got tried of being the one saying ‘ask them this’ when traveling,” Ken said. “I didn’t want to be that guy any more.” So he began lessons.
His sons learned it in middle school and his wife Kathy began learning at that time to both help the boys, but also to cross it off her Bucket List. She enjoyed it so much that she earned a Bachelors Degree in Spanish. Ken and Kathy even did a trip to Guatemala for a 5 day immersion program a few years ago. After he retired, they returned for a three- week immersion program
“Guatemala is a great place to learn Spanish,” Ken said. “They speak more slowly down there and the people are phenomenal.” Their program was in Quetzaltenango, the second largest city in Guatemala located nearly 5 hour bus ride from Guatemalea City. where there are very few Gringos (English-speaking Anglo-American). “You’re forced to speak Spanish all the time,” Ken said.
He and Kathy were drawn to Guatemala and its people ever since their first visit there. Ken knows that his future involves a life of service, maybe in Guatemala. “I felt as though I served people in my role at the bank, but now it will be something different.” Ken said. “Something about mission service.”
For now, Ken is enjoying every day. As an avid outdoorsmen he is cycling on his retirement present. Ken, not one to spend money on himself, he made an exception and splurged on a new road bike — a custom-built Salsa Warroad, complete with a Shimano D12 groupset and carbon wheels (Whiskey No. 9 30d).
He is also going backpacking both by himself as well as with his sons. He is also putting all his outdoor knowledge to work with others with his blog fourbrothersgear.com. He named this site after his four sons who also share his love of adventure. On his blog, Ken gives detailed descriptions of hikes and camping trips he has taken and gives insider tips for people who may be interested in taking these trips as well.
Ken also does in depth reviews of hiking and camping gear. He creates YouTube videos where he gives descriptions and demonstrations of various types of gear. (Writers note: These are awesome. I don’t even like hiking and camping, but thoroughly enjoyed the videos.)
Next on his list is taking a trip to Spain to walkThe Camino de Santiago, or the Way of St. James with Kathy. This is an ancient pilgrimage trail in Europe made up of a vast network of roads and paths, leading to the Cathedral of Santiago de Compostela.
How Did He Get Here?
When Ken announced that he was retiring, many colleagues lamented that they were not in a position to retire before age 65. As a banker, Ken understood the financial constraints many people are under.
However, Ken and his wife Kathy had been preparing for retirement for “many, many, many, many years.” Ken worked in banking while Kathy worked raising their four sons. Ken is careful to say that Kathy didn’t work outside the home because he knew how hard she worked raising their sons.
“The choices we make in life about our finances and spending habits influence the ability to do what I’m doing, retiring at 60,” Ken said.
They worked together putting money into Ken’s 401K and their savings. They also made sure not to live beyond their means. Even though they had four boys with only 3 and a half years separating them, the boys did not have their own car. Part of it was financial, the other part was “car conversations”. Those times when your kids will talk about what’s going on in their lives.
“When you have young men, to have them talk, you have to have food, an activity or have them in the car,” Ken said. Kathy learned a lot about her boys during these times in the car. “It served our family well,” Ken said.
Ken’s whole family including his new daughter.-in-law.
Ken and Kathy also put all four sons through College. They planned early with 529 plans for each of them and a promise to put them through the University of Wisconsin- Madison (their home state).
“You can spend $60,000 at Purdue or $25,000 a year at the University of Wisconsin on an engineering degree. The outcome is the same,” Ken said. If his sons had wanted a different option, they could pay the difference.
“We have been pretty intentional about how we spent our money,” Ken said. They also made sure that before they retired they did not have any debt. No car or house payments.
Health Care Costs
Health care is definitely a concern for Ken and Kathy. They did not have health care benefits through his job and are currently in the insurance open market. He is on COBRA.
The cost of insurance is very expensive, but it was another item that Ken and Kathy made sure to take into account before he left his job.
Three of his sons are on his insurance; however, they are cost sharing. His sons are paying their portion of the insurance and so far the arrangement is working out. Still Ken knows this will be a significant expense until he and Kathy reach 65.
The Future Looks Bright
At this point, Ken is not sure what the future holds. He knows that in some way it will involve service and will leverage his love of Spanish language.
Ken, Kathy and the boys.
For now he is enjoying his time with family and friends, although he and Kathy are not spending that much more time together. “You know what they say ‘For better or for worse, but not for lunch,” Ken said. His wife is very busy with her life so after they share a coffee in the morning, they often don’t see each other again until dinner time.
And Ken is the one doing the cooking! At least some of the time. “I’m a passionate cook. I love cooking.” Ken said. His specialties include making smoked meat, homemade pizza and sourdough bread.
Ken’s life is also full of kids in transition, “One is moving to Ann Arbor. I’m helping another one buy a car. Another is applying to Med School,” Ken said. He is enjoying having the time to help them.
After the summer, he is also entertaining many ideas. He may apply for a job at REI just for “grins and giggles.” As an avid customer, he knows so much about many of the products at REI. They even have opportunities to guide trips which Ken said he would enjoy doing.
“I’m so excited about my life. I don’t know where it’s going, but I know it’s going to be good,” Ken said. “I feel there is something more in my life that I’m meant to use the skills I’ve been blessed with to serve others.”
His Advice Moving Forward
“I tell my boys, “I retired March 4th and on March 5th I began dispensing advice to solve all the world’s problems,” Ken said with a laugh.
But really, he said he has the same advice he had heard from so many others, “You have to retire to something.”
“You have to understand what motivates you. That will help you determine where and how you want to invest your time,” Ken said.
“Dream big. People can do this, but you have to have some foresight.”
Interviewing others about making major life transitions after 50 has been the best research I ever could have done as I reimagine my own future.
Last year, with the help of my friends Bill and Bunny, I came up with the idea for this blog. I have been amazed, and continue to be amazed, that this couple made the decision to sell everything and move to Bonaire. Their bravery or craziness, inspired me to think about other friends who had major like changes after 50. I told their story in my first post.
Starting this blog has been one of the most fun and exciting adventures I have pursued in a very long time. I find that I love talking to people and telling their stories. Each one is so unique and almost everyone has told me that they didn’t think they are special and weren’t sure they had a story to share.
However, I have found that each person has something to teach me as I prepare for my own re-imagination into the world of retirement.
It’s challenging leaving behind a place I have worked for the past 15 years. As I prepare to leave, I reflect on all I have accomplished and all the people I have helped and those who have helped me along the way. I am trying to let go of the frustrations and failures and focus on the good so I can move on into the next phase of my life.
I tell people that from 1 to 30 years old, we are forming into the people we are going to be. From 30 to 60 years old, we concentrate on working, taking care of of spouses, children and/or parents. Now, from 60 to 90 years old, at least for me, is going to be about me and what I want to do.
So, my blog is research project as I graduate from a traditional work environment into whatever the rest of my life will be. As I interview people, I have discovered a few key tips to make the transition go more smoothly.
Review Your Finances — Look at how much revenue you will have coming in after you transition. Talk to an expert if possible. Determine what expenses are necessary and what you can do without.
Pay Down Your Debt — As one interviewee said, “Debt is like being a slave to the bank.” Every day you are working to pay that money back, plus interest. Be as debt-free as possible when you leave your full-time gig.
Plan For Fun — If you put yourself on a restrictive budget, you will feel deprived. If you can’t manage fun on your retirement income, figure out a part-time gig that will help generate income. For Bridget in Curacao, that gig was opening up an Italian ice stand to serve tourist coming off the cruise ships.
Plan for the Unexpected — Each one of my interviewees have had a setback. Many of them related to COVID. But they made it through, even though it wasn’t easy.
Find Your Passion — What do you love? For Steve Blechschmidt, it was the guitar. Every day he practices for hours perfecting his unique finger style guitar playing.
Never Stop Learning — Some people are practicing their passion every day, some are taking classes or reading books, for me I am researching by meeting people and hearing their stories.
I’ve never had the luxury of figuring out what I want to do. I have been more focused on what I could do to make money to support my family. Now, I have been given this gift of time.
I invite you to come along on my journey or better yet, become a part of it. I am always looking for new people to be a part of my blog. If you have made a major life change after 50, or you know someone who has, email me at ksparis15@gmail.com. I want to tell your story.
Thanks for supporting my blog so far and as my mother-in-law used to say, “The best is yet to come!”
When Joya Fields needed a new career, she used her life long passion for design to begin a staging business.
At an age when many people are thinking of retirement, Joya Fields decided to begin a new career as a stager.
Stagers are the people that go into a house before it is put on the market and make it more appealing to buyers. Even in this hot real estate market, stagers are in high demand because in a 2021 RESA survey of 4600 properties, 73% of staged properties sold over list price and staged houses sold approximately 9 days faster than unstaged.
Joya always had an eye for design. As a child, she would use the stairs of her home to create an apartment building for Barbie and her friends. Each apartment was unique.
But it wasn’t until her brother-in-law, who is a real estate agent, asked for her help in staging a home that sat on the market too long that Joya thought she could make a living with those same designing skills. After Joya worked her magic, there were multiple offers in a week.
With a few more successes and encouragement from her family, Joya decided to make a career change.
Early Career as a Writer
For many years, Joya worked as a published author and freelance writer. In fact, she has over 35 books to her credit, most of which are romantic suspense novels. She has has written over 50 articles for various magazines including Maryland Family, True Confessions and True Romance. However, when her husband retired 10 years earlier than they had originally planned, Joya knew she needed a career that paid more money. “I knew it was this, work full-time or start waitressing,” Joya said with a chuckle.
Becoming a Professional Stager
But before she could begin as a serious stager, Joya knew it was important to get certified. Being certified to stage houses is not required in Maryland, but Joya thought it would make her more marketable. So, she signed up for a Home Staging Class at the Home Staging Resource www.homestagingresource.com
Before and After Professional Staging
She credits that class as the reason she is so successful. “The teacher was so good,” Joya said. As a lifelong learner, she saw it as a great way to learn the basics. “You need to know the rules in order to break the rules,” she said.
With her natural eye towards design and the knowledge from her course, Joya started working with several area real estate agents staging homes. She invested money from her savings and began purchasing in items that could be used to stage homes.
Although successful, Joya decided to join forces with one of the other students from her online staging class. She merged her business with Shamrock Hill Design.
Joining a Team
Shamrock Hill consists of four women responsible for design and staging and a stay-at-home dad that works as their mover. He’s responsible for moving everything they need for staging from the warehouse. The company stages homes in Baltimore County, Howard County, Carroll County and Anne Arundel County.
“The difference between being an interior designer and a stager is that one creates a home for you to live in, the other helps buyers see themselves living in a home,” Joya said.
One of the benefits of working with a company is that she has a whole warehouse at her disposal to stage homes. There are pillows, rugs, pictures, etc., everything she needs for staging a home. Many of the items come from Costco. Home Goods and At Home, but sometimes they find a treasure at Goodwill. If they need books for staging, they get them from the local library.
The other benefit of working with a company is that there are other people to do the paperwork and marketing, two tasks that Joya does not enjoy. “Now, I get to do what I really like,” Joya said.
There are many levels of service available. Many times she will work with the furniture the home owner already has and just move it around or add to it. However, Joya can also come in and refurnish a vacant home to sell. “Each house is different and each one tells a story,” she said.
Recently, Joya decided to expand her business by becoming a certified Residential Transition Specialist. With this training Joya will be able to help older individuals with “right-sizing” or “down-sizing”. This training focuses on helping people declutter and get their homes ready for the market.
Joya loves working with older people and often finds herself spending hours talking to them about their lives when she goes in for a consultant.
Joya stages about 10 houses a month and “I fall in love with every one of them,” Joya said. The process begins when the real estate agent engages her as a consultant. Joya prepares a 15- page report detailing what needs to be done in each room. Then, it is up to the home owner to decide whether or not to hire her to implement the report.
There are multiple levels of service and Joya works with the homeowner to determine what they need. Even though she charges a set fee, rather than a percentage she says, “We love it when people make more money.”
Her Other “Full-Time” Job
But Joya doesn’t spend all her time staging homes. Joya and her husband Joey moved in with their son to help take care of their grandson. They live on a large piece of land in Randallstown. Joya said when she comes home from her appointments she puts on her jeans and goes to work. She’ll spend the rest of the day working on the farm feeding chickens, gathering eggs and working in the garden.
Her other responsibilities involve being “Gigi” to her grandson. She loves the flexibility of her job which allows her to attend his t-ball games, school events and just spend time with him. “I didn’t want a 9 to 5 job. I wanted something with flexibility.”
Joya was a little nervous starting her new career. She had to take money out of her family’s saving with no guarantee that she would be successful. However, she credits her teacher with setting her up for success. Although at times she doubted herself, her instructor said, “Fake it till you make it.”
Joya continues to be supported by her co-workers as well as fellow stagers in the staging Facebook group. “When I had a problem recently and couldn’t figure out, I put it out to the group,” she said. They had great ideas that help her resolve her issue.
“It’s a great community of women helping women,” Joya said.
Joya is also still finding some time to write. She is responsible for the company blog and has also submitted a proposal for her farm story. “It’s really been bugging me. I need to get back to writing.”
Whatever the challenge, Joya meets it with a smile and a desire to learn. “I love learning,” Joya said.
If you are interested in finding out more about being a stager, you can find out more information at the Real Estate Staging Association.
If you know someone who would make a great subject for this blog, contact me at ksparis15@gmail.com.
Whether it’s losing her job or losing 70 pounds, Janet faces her challenges with a smile and a positive attitude.
When Janet Streit was called into her supervisor’s office on March 21, 2022 in the middle of the day, she had an idea what was going to happen. When she saw the HR person sitting there, she was sure of it.
But when they told her that her job had been eliminated, Janet had a different reaction from most. She said, “Thank you. I’ve been looking for a sign that it was that it was time to retire.” In fact, the Saturday before, she had put something in her journal about it. She now had that sign.
At 68, Janet had considered retiring even before this happened. She had even contacted the retirement specialist, but there was a problem. “I loved my job,” said Janet.
She had worked as a volunteer manager at a hospital in Florida for 9 years managing approximately 200 volunteers. Then COVID hit and volunteers were no longer allowed in the hospital. But Janet, never one to sit around, offered to work screening individuals coming into the hospital. Then she took over the scheduling of staff to screen people entering the hospital. When screening was outsourced, she helped the transition with the new company. After 18 months, volunteers began returning once again to the hospital and Janet was able to get back to her “real” job.
However, COVID hit hospitals hard. Many hospitals actually lost revenue due to the fact that auxiliary services were limited and individuals didn’t want to go to hospitals for fear of catching COVID. Janet knew that the loss of her job was a financial decision and she wasn’t bitter at all.
But Janet is never bitter. She faces life with an enthusiasm that overflows into every aspect of her life. She fills her day with journal writing, meditative walks, recording gratitudes and setting her intentions.
She began her spiritual approach to life as she took her her role as caretaker with her mother. That spiritual part of life intensified while living and working on a biodynamic organic farm in 2010 after the death of her mother. Janet had been working as the volunteer director at Greater Baltimore Medical Center when her mother passed after struggling with Alzheimer’s for nine-years. Janet needed a fresh start. She moved to the White Rose Farm in Taneytown, MD as the business associate and started doing their marketing to promote it.
On the farm, Janet was exposed to many new spiritual practices that the owner encouraged on the farm. She credits her personal practices with not only her positive attitude towards life, but also her good health.
For example, Janet is one of the few people who lost weight during COVID. A long time WW (Weight Watchers) member, Janet applied those practices to her life during COVID and actually completed her journey to her lifetime goal losing over 70 pounds. She has now applied to be a WW coach after being encouraged by her own WW coach to do so.
Navigating the Transition
Just because Janet took the news of her job elimination well, did not mean that she was without fear. The hospital had a retirement transition specialist that Janet was able to work with. Before the meeting, they asked Janet to get together all of her financial records, expenses and investment records. She said it took two weeks to get everything together. After careful examination of everything, she was told, she could maintain her current lifestyle until she was 97.
Two things helped Janet be so financially secure. The first was the pension she received from working with the Girl Scouts of the USA. “They are all about helping women, so they offered a strong pension,” Janet said. In addition, Janet is debt-free. She has no house payment, no car payment and no credit card debt. When she asked the advisor what to do about possible unexpected expenses like replacing her 7-year-old car he said, “That’s what your investments are for.”
Her advisor was also impressed because when Janet created her expenses for the month, she included things like travel, hobbies, going out and having fun. He said, many people don’t remember to include those items, but Janet is all about having enjoying life. “I’m not talking about being frivolous, just about having fun,” she likes to clarify.
Janet may have needed more reassurance than most because she is single. “A few years ago I said ‘You just got you babe,” Janet said.
Taking Chances
But that has never prevented her from taking on new challenges and making big changes. After two years at the farm, Janet knew she needed to make money because “I didn’t have any,” she said. While visiting her brother in Florida, Janet got a job offer from the zoo and they paid for her to move down there. She was then able to get other jobs helping form a farm cooperative and working with the local Food Bank before securing her position at the hospital.
What’s Next?
Now, Janet has different goals for her next job, “I need something that feeds my soul. Something that gives me joy,” Janet said. That was one of the reasons she applied at WW. Not only has it helped her lost 70 pounds, but she has also learned to transform any recipe into something points-friendly. (See the end of the blog for her borscht recipe.) She wants to share her knowledge and experience and commitment to the program with others.
She loves the fact that at this point in her life she is not worried about making money, “There’s such freedom in not having to make a specific dollar amount,” Janet said.
Although her plans are somewhat unclear and she describes her life as “chaotic”, Janet is sure everything will work out. She believes in putting out her intentions to create the life she wants. Recently, she returned from a walk and drew a mandala, a kind of drawing meditation. She said she has drawn several of these at pivotal points in her life. This one she titled, “Keep moving towards abundance.”
Her friend on the farm always said, “Assume you have enough.” Janet said she has a different philosophy, “Live in abundance.” To her abundance is not simply about money. It is more about enjoying a joyful and meaningful life.
She fills her day connecting with friends and her brother, doing 3-5 mile meditative walks, cooking low point meals and piddling in her patio garden.
She is currently planning a trip to the Adirondacks with her brother and seeing what happens next. Janet is not sure that volunteering will be part of her plan because it would “feel too much like work” after working for years as a volunteer coordinator.
Her advice to others is “Figure out what you want in life and go for it. All anyone wants is there for them if we open to it and notice it unfolding. Life is good!”
If you know someone you think would make a good subject for this blog, email: ksparis15@gmail.com.
Bridget and her husband Dave moved to Curacao they new they couldn’t retire, but they wanted to do something fun. An Italian Ice cart was the perfect answer.
When Bridget Merker and her husband Dave first visited Curaçao in 2012, they immediately felt at home. “I could live here,” Dave said. So, in 2017, when a job became available at the desalination plant in Curaçao, it was not surprising that Dave, an industrial engineer, decided to apply. After extensive negotiations, the job seemed like a reality.
They were so sure Dave was going to get the job that they prepared their Virginia home to be put on the market. Then the company sold the division and the job disappeared.
However, they already scheduled a vacation to Curaçao and decided to go anyway. During their time on the island, they looked into the practical aspects of moving there. They rented a car explored the island, looked at real estate options and determined what it would take to live there.
After “crunching the numbers” they knew completely retiring was not an option. Bridget was only 48 at this time. However, a semi-retirement was definitely feasible. “We always wanted to retire early, but not as early as we did,” she said. “It was doable.” But they had to think of what they could do part-time.
Bridget, who had always been in the hospitality business, thought about getting a job at a hotel, but that would have required her to be fluent in both Dutch and Papiamentu, a Spanish and Portuguese-based creole language spoken in the Dutch Caribbean.
Then, they remembered that during their previous visits, the island had almost everything except Italian Ice. There were no cool, refreshing, dairy free treats for tourists to enjoy like the treats from their childhood summers. They knew they had a winner of an idea. The only issue was whether to call it Italian ice like they did in Bridget’s native New Jersey or water ice like they did in Dave’s home town of Philly. They decided on “Caribbean Breeze Italian Ice.”
Moving to Curaçao
Although it was terrible time to sell a house in 2017 in Charlottesville, VA, they got an offer on their house. So, they packed up their stuff and moved to Curaçao to develop their Italian ice business.
First, they contacted a service to help them with the immigration paperwork. They decided to use an immigration attorney to help them navigate the process. Bridget said it was worth it to use the service. “They were so thorough,” Bridget said. Her permanent residency status was approved in 8 days and her husband’s was approved in 20.
However, since they weren’t buying property, Bridget and Dave had to show a specific amount of money in the bank.
Overall, it was easy. ”It’s very simple. Americans are treated like Dutch who want to move to the island,” Bridget said.
Finding a New Home
Bridget and Dave were open to many options as long as it was within their price range. Sometimes, convincing realtors that they weren’t Americans where price was no object was a challenge.
Initially, they ended up moving to a residential area on the East side of the island. They had a king size bed, couches, dresser, etc. in a shipping container headed to Curaçao and needed a place to fit it all.
“If I had to do any thing different,” Bridget said. “I wouldn’t have brought my stuff. I would have rented a furnished apartment here.”
Although the house was nice and affordable, it had no view of the water and there was too much traffic on their way to work. “After almost 2 years of living here and having dreamt about living here for years, I wanted to have a nicer view ,” Bridget said. They ended up moving to a much smaller condo closer to downtown that had a view of the Caribbean Sea and ended up selling much of their furniture. Now they have a beautiful view and have a 10 minute drive to work.
Caribbean Breeze Italian Ice
Bridget and Dave began Caribbean Breeze Italian Ice with a stand that Dave build himself. “At first, it was challenging because people didn’t know the product,” Bridget said. But that didn’t deter them.
They moved from the stand to a cart in order to be more mobile. They decided against a store front because they didn’t want to work all the time. Also, since their target audience is mostly tourists, they worked when the cruise ships were in port.
They take their cart into Punda, Curaçao’s historic downtown, near the Queen Emma floating bridge. “I work in a UNESCO World Heritage site,” Bridget said. (The whole downtown area of Curaçao is a UNESCO World Heritage site.)
They operate their cart when the cruise ships are in port. There are six flavors of this cool tasty treat: Piña Colada, Blue Raspberry, Watermelon, Mango, Cherry and Lemon. Piña Colada is the most popular flavor. It’s a bargain at $3 American dollars apiece or $5 Guilders (the local currency in Curaçao).
Free Time on Curaçao
When not working, Bridget loves exploring the island, visiting with friends and running typical errands like grocery shopping. Every Sunday, they go to the beach with friends. There are over 45 beaches on Curacao and they have been to most of them. But they have a special local beach they like the best. ”It is not the most photographed beach, but we love it there,” Bridget said.
Bridget also likes spending time at the 28 museums on the island. “If there is one thing, I miss about the United States it’s the museums,” Bridget said. However, in addition to the museums, there is amazing street art that is popping up all over town.
The biggest change for Bridget is that she was a type A person and still is, but she has now dialed it back. She feels healthier being outside all the time and is enjoying the warm weather. She always imagined herself on an island when she was working in the corporate world, saving for that seven-day vacation. “But now I never want to go back to working for someone else,” Bridget said. “We’re outside so much. It’s a healthier lifestyle.” They also spend a lot of their time in the sea, snorkeling and swimming. “I’d rather be in the sea than the pool and I hate the gym,” Bridget said.
Another big change since moving to the island is that they now don’t hang out at touristy places. “When we first moved here, we went where the tourist went. Then a friend showed us a little hole in the wall with great food. We loved it,” Bridget said. Bridget and Dave have met locals who have shown them all the best local places: shopping, restaurants, bars and beaches.
Challenges in Paradise
When COVID hit in March 2020, their business was shut down for about 16 months. They had to spend a lot of time together in their little apartment. Bridget said she reached out to other ex-pats on the ABC islands (Aruba, Bonaire, Curaçao). That’s where she connected with Bill Horton from my first blog.
It was challenging, but luckily they had money in the bank. She was glad they had emergency fund saved before moving down to Curaçao because “you never know when something like a pandemic might happen.”
Eventually, they got back to business and then got hit again. In late December 2021, Curaçao got hit with COVID again, but they didn’t stress, they just decided to take a month off.
The other challenge besides COVID was leaving family and friends back in the states.
The Best Part of Making a Big Move
Bridget and Dave are happy with their decision in spite of the fact that there have been some challenges. “We love working for ourselves,” Bridget said.
The best part of semi-retirement on Curacao? “Freedom,” Bridget and Dave said together. “If we want to go somewhere we go. If we want to sleep in we do,” Bridget said.
However, Bridget said their life might not be for everyone. If you’re thinking about a big move Bridget said, “Go for it, but do the research,” she said.
If you want to find out more about Caribbean Breeze Italian ice, follow them on Facebook, Instagram and TripAdvisor.
If you know someone that would make a good subject for my blog, email me at ksparis15@gmail.com.
Steve Blechschmidt traded in his corporate life for a place in the mountains and he couldn’t be happier.
Steve Blechschmidt traded in his seat at the corporate table for a home in the Colorado mountains and he couldn’t be happier.
When Steve was offered a promotion during a company reorganization, he knew it wasn’t the right move for him. “I knew deep down inside that I didn’t want to put in the effort it would take to do one those big jobs properly,” Steve said. “Those jobs are hard, hard, hard.” Instead, he suggested a compromise that helped him transition into retirement.
In 2015, Steve offered to work remotely as a contractor, performing a critical function for the company. It was less money, but it was also less stress. The company management team agreed to his terms and he worked in that capacity for four years until he was laid off.
“I never decided here we go. Now’s the time (to retire),” Steve said. If he hadn’t been laid off, he would have kept on working.
However during his transition time, he and his wife, Carol, took steps to make retirement possible. They moved from Denver, Colorado to the mountain town of Pagosa Springs, Colorado where he has lived for the past six years.
They also became debt-free. To him that meant no house payment and no car payment. “Debt is slavery. You are a slave to the bank,” Steve said. “I don’t need a lot of money to live. Being debt free is very freeing, a game changing place to be.”
Being debt-free also allowed him to not worry about bringing in additional income and he was free to pursue his real passion full-time: playing the guitar.
Becoming a Full-Time Musician
“I’m a musician now,” Steve said. He plays finger style guitar. “It’s the way Chet Atkins plays the guitar.” He said he feels a passion for guitar that he never felt when working in IT.
Steve practices between one and four hours every day. “I play ambient music in beautiful settings,” Steve said. You’ll find him playing his guitar at wine tastings, very nice restaurants and world’s deepest hot springs that are right there in Pagosa Springs. ”I love giving someone a moment of peace visa via a guitar,” Steve said.
He started playing the guitar at 38 as a promise to his daughter. When she was ready to give up on her piano lessons, he made a deal with her. “If you keep up with your piano lessons, I’ll learn to play the guitar,” Steve said. She did and as a result, he learned to play the guitar.
Something happened when he picked up that guitar, “A tremendous passion came over me. Some people even think I’m a bit of a nut in how hard I work at playing the guitar,” Steve said with a chuckle. “It’s not an easy way to play a guitar.” He loves playing the guitar and practices between 1 – 4 hours a day.
Making Retirement Work
In addition to playing the guitar, Steve spends quite a bit of time preparing wood for the winter. He has a permit to chop down wood to help heat his cabin and of course has household chores and a honey do list to keep him busy.
“Still, I have those retiree days where I say ‘What day is it today? Wednesday? Thursday?’” Steve said. The only thing on his calendar are gigs.
“I like being completely in control of my days and schedule,” Steve said However, he understands the importance of having some type of focus in his life. “It’s important to have something to latch onto and for me, that’s music.”
He has a word of warning to people contemplating retirement. “It’s important to not let yourself dissolve into nothingness,” He said, “it’s easy to drink too much, eat too much, watch too much TV and not do a damn thing in retirement.”
He encourages people to find their passion and start working on it even before they retire. “Begin now to understand your passion and begin working on it,” Steve said.
Planning Out Finances in Retirement
In addition to his plan to become debt free, Steve also credits his and Carol’s attitude towards money as a contributing factor to their retirement success.
“My wife and I have always been down to earth people. I like old pickup trucks rather than BMWs,” Steve said. “This lifestyle of not wanting fancy glitzy things has served us well.”
In addition, Steve said he and his wife have never been big travelers so that was never really part of their retirement financial plan. “We chose live in the Colorado Rockies. Every day is a vacation. People come to where we live for their vacations.” Steve said.
But Steve never really had a true plan for retirement. Instead, he decided to figure it out as he went along.
He said he was lucky enough to do well in some real estate transactions. That money helped him until he was able to collect social security at 62. “I took it as soon as I could,” Steve said. Carol’s retirement and Steve’s social security take care of their monthly expenses.
In addition, Steve uses his guitar playing to supplement his retirement income. “It’s very hard to make a lot of money being a musician,” Steve said. However, he said, “In a good month I can make about $1,000.”
They have savings and a stock portfolio that they can leverage for any unexpected expenses.
Handling Health Insurance
Steve is fortunate enough to be covered under his wife’s medical plan. As a retired school teacher she had a medical plan that continued even after she retired. Even though she is now on Medicare, her insurance will continue to cover him until he turns 65 in three years.
However, Steve said he has not really needed much health care so far. He describes himself as a “dietary nut” who has been blessed with good health. He doesn’t eat processed sugar and eats completely organic food. He does still like to indulge in a beer occasionally. After all, he lives in Colorado where good craft beer is everywhere.
Steve stays fit walking in 7,500 foot altitude and preparing the wood pile for the long Colorado winters. He also loves preparing wood for winter including chopping down trees (with his permit) and stacking wood.
Advice for Others
Steve said he believes what is most important in life is contribution. “I think you need to contribute and I contribute through music,” Steve said. “You need to find your passion. Grow your skill set at your passion. There is no magic, secret sauce, you have to work your ass off.”
If you would like to know more about Steve or hear him play the guitar, go to his website: SEBguitar.com.
If you know someone who has made a big life change after 50, please email me at: ksparis15@gmail.com
When Chris met her new husband, she also found herself starting on a new career as well. It’s been a perfect combination.
When Christiane Schmitz Beavis married her second husband, David, on the island of Tortola in 2014, she got more than a life partner, she also got a new career.
David, is part owner in VOYAGE charters reservations, specializing in luxury charter yacht vacations in the British Virgin Islands, (BVI). His venture started when he began working as crew on catamarans in the Caribbean. David met Robin and his wife, Jo Ann in the BVI as they were starting up a small charter company with another couple. Twenty five years later, the business has grown into a family owned, boutique charter business on Tortola. After working as crew, David and his first wife participated in the start up of the Annapolis reservation office in 2000, working exclusively with VOYAGE charters BVI, booking charters on VOYAGE yachts in the BVI.
In 2016, Chris joined the company. After a lifelong career in the lab industry, she was ready for a change. “It was a world I was completely unfamiliar with prior to meeting David,” Chris said. But over the years she had developed strong customer service and management skills that she was able to bring to VOYAGE charters. “It was scary (leaving corporate America), but it was also very freeing,” Chris said.
Although perhaps lesser known then the U.S. Virgin Islands, they are no less beautiful with white sand beaches, clear ocean waters and amazing snorkeling and scuba diving. The BVI also have rock formations called the Baths that people come from all over to see.
Chris spends most of her time at the reservation office in Annapolis or working from a home office. She and David work together with their team answering people’s questions about charters, doing computer work and brainstorming ways to promote and grow their business.
Their days start by “walking” their 14-year-old dog and then taking another walk “to get the blood flowing.” During this second walk, they discuss the day ahead and form strategies on how to grow the business and address issues that come up. “I never thought I’d want to live and work with my husband,” Chris said. They are partners in life and in business. After their morning walk, David and sometimes Chris, ride their bikes to work. “I love working with and traveling with my husband.”
“It’s a very different pace than working for corporate America,” Chris said. “Now I work for a small family-owned company where my work is my life. It is a seven-day a-week job.” However, Chris doesn’t mind. “I’m working harder, especially the last couple of years. But it’s wonderful because I have my partner with me.”
A side benefit of her new career is that Chris has been able to experience these luxury vacations, sometimes complete with a captain and chef. She has also had more time to travel. She and her husband head down to the BVI a couple times a year to meet with their business partners and to see how everything is going.
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“It’s very beautiful, but it has its challenges living in paradise. It’s very different from our life here.” Chris said. However, Chris is grateful to have the opportunity for frequent visits. “Even though I’m not a sailor, I find it incredibly relaxing to be on the water in such a beautiful part of the world. There’s no better way to see the islands.”
Hitting Rough Waters
But not everything has been a fantasy. In 2017, the BVI was decimated by Hurricane Irma. “It took out our entire fleet and our base down in the BVI,” Chris said. At first, she and her husband didn’t even know if anyone at VOYAGE charters had survived. A second storm soon followed. “David flew to Puerto Rico and made his way to Tortola to drop off some cash, a satellite phone and medicines before the second storm was predicted to hit,” Chris said. “It was very scary for us.”
“I was so new to the business I thought ‘What does this mean’?” Chris said. She knew it wasn’t good. “It took us a few years to dig out from that.” At first, Chris was wondering if she would need to go back to her job in corporate America. But it worked out that she was able to stay on and help rebuild the business.
That didn’t mean that they didn’t have to do a lot of belt tightening, but “we had a nest egg if we needed to tap into it.” They did.
Chris had already been through some challenges in her life including the settlement of her home’s foundation shortly after leaving her job to be a full-time mom and then a divorce from her first husband. However, she feels that those experiences gave her “strength and resilience for the future,” she said.
“We were just coming around the corner from after the hurricanes when COVID hit,” Chris said. The BVI shut down from March 2020 to December 2020 and no tourists were allowed into the territory. According to Chris, even once it opened there was quarantining and multiple testing for tourists visiting the BVI. The BVI lost much of its business to the U.S. Virgin Island, which had fewer restrictions.
“When the BVI was locked down, most of the people there (in the BVI) had no source of income. It’s amazing they were able to get by,” Chris said. It was a struggle for VOYAGEcharters as well. “As a company, we were very fortunate to have boat owners and customers who were supportive of us,” Chris said.
One of their customers, The Cathy Family, owners of Chick-Fil-A, who organizes retreats with VOYAGEcharters, was one of the first ones to call and ask what they could do to help after Irma and the pandemic.
“Through the grace of God and perseverance of the family that owns the charter company, we got through it,” Chris said.
“I have such admiration for what they went through and the positivity that they carried with them throughout it.”
Coming Out of the Storm
Now in 2022, Chris said it finally feels as though things are getting back to normal. “Things are busy, busy, busy.” They are back up to 21 yachts in the fleet and have a new model which will have added 9 new yachts to the fleet by 2024.
“They’ve had a really lush spring down there. The remnants of the hurricane are all but gone,” Chris said, having just visited recently. “You do see some abandoned boats and damage that was done by the storm, but all the greenery has come back.”
Managing Health Care
Working for a small business, Chris relies on the Affordable Care Act (ACA) for health insurance. “That was very eye opening for me. In corporate America, I always had great insurance, but now I’m on the open market.”
At first, she went to a private company that said she would have to have a $30,000 rider, per year for her lifetime, in case she hurt her knee. She had previously had ACL surgery and as a pre-existing condition, it wasn’t covered.
“Obamacare did me a huge favor because I had ACL surgery and I have high blood pressure,” Chris said. Both are considered previous existing conditions and weren’t covered under private insurance. The ACA covered both her high blood pressure and any injuries she might have to her knee leaving her free to resume a more active lifestyle.
In addition to walking and biking, Chris has taken up paddle boarding that she loves doing on the Severn River as well as in the Caribbean.
However, Chris said she’s found some downsides to getting her own insurance. “It is an incredible expense, and you still have copays,” Chris said. She has also had difficulty finding doctors she in her plan.
Advice For Those Looking to Make a Change
Chris said she encourages her peers, those 50+, to explore options and figure out what they want to do with the rest of their lives.
“By the time you’re our age, you should be able to trust your gut. There are so many resources to research what you want to do and explore,” Chris said. She encourages people to find out more about different life options. “People are so willing to talk and share their experiences.” She credits Facebook as one way to reach out to people and find out what they’re doing and what might be right for you.
Her final words of advice. “Don’t be afraid. Don’t settle for unhappiness. You are in charge of your own destiny and happiness. There are so many things that we can’t do anything about but there are things we can do something about and the biggest thing is our attitude.”
Smooth sailings Chris.
To find out more about VOYAGEcharters, go to their website VOYAGEcharters.com.
If you know someone who would be an interesting subject for my blog, email me at ksparis15@gmail.com.
Bert found out there’s a lot you can learn working at Walmart.
“Welcome to Walmart!”
Retirees joke about becoming a greeter at Walmart, but for Bert Shayte it became a reality and was just what he needed at just the right time.
Bert had the same dreams of a traditional retirement that many people have: living in the house he had shared with his wife of many years and bouncing grandchildren on his knee. But at 54, Bert found himself divorced, kids grown and living out of town and in a job where he was asked to do more and more for less and less. Ready for a change, he left his job with the intention of taking a break and finding a new job within six months.
He spent some time volunteering at the Baltimore Humane Society walking and feeding dogs. That’s where he got his pit bull Bertha, his constant companion. It was a little bit of a rough start. She was a puppy and he had to housebreak her. She was also very skittish at the beginning, afraid to go down the steps and even tried to attack his television set once.
After a few years, he had still not found a paying job in his former profession, publishing. Instead, he was living off his savings and spending much of his time in his man cave with Bertha, in front of the television with a drink in his hand and eating unhealthy food.
An off-handed comment from a friend made him realize that he was drinking too much and doing too little. He knew he wasn’t living the life he wanted to live and decided to get help. He started seeing a therapist who helped him get onto a more positive path.
Working at Walmart
But then COVID hit. Feelings of isolation grew, and he knew he had to do something different. So, he applied to Walmart as a Customer Host, today’s version of a greeter.
“I was hired on the spot,” Bert said. He started making only $11 or $12 an hour, but he did get COVID bonuses for working during the pandemic. “The best part of it was being out and around people.” He developed a camaraderie with some of his co-workers and even some of the customers.
He began working in July 2020 at the height of the pandemic. “I went from seeing almost no one to seeing thousands every day” he said.
Bert balanced preventing theft with enforcing the mask mandate. “People yelled at me when I had to give them masks and they yelled at me when I ran out of masks,” Bert said. “Basically, it seemed like someone was always yelling at me.” But a friend told him, “You’re exactly where God wants you to be.”
“It was humbling,” Bert said. “But I eventually learned not to take things so personally.”
He had originally signed up to work five days a week but found he could only handle four. Standing on his feet 8 hours a day watching customers was tiring. Bert said, “It was like a circus sometimes. I thought they should sell tickets.”
Bert learned a lot about himself working at Walmart. “You see all kinds of people wearing all kinds of things,” he said. I found myself being very judgmental. “One day I saw this very heavyset guy come in and I thought, I bet he’s headed right to McDonald’s.” The man did end up going over to McDonald’s and then came over and sat down on a bench near Bert and struck up a conversation. Bert learned that the man had had an organ transplant, which had contributed to his weight gain. “He was a really nice guy,” Bert said. He realized maybe he was judging people too quickly and for no good reason. “Not that I didn’t judge people after that, but I was more conscious of it,” Bert said.
The same friend who told Bert that God wanted him at Walmart told him a year later, “It’s time to go.” Bert knew that was true when he was reprimanded for leaving his door post to help render aid to a woman having a medical emergency in the parking lot.
On his last day, Bert asked a customer for his receipt, as was his job. The man told Bert his wife had the receipt and was just behind him. There was no one following him, so Bert again asked for the receipt and the man just continued through the doors. Bert turned over the cart and intervened to prevent a theft of over $2,000 in merchandise…which was not an expected part of the job. He was working diligently right up until the minute he left.
“It would have been nice if I’d found a less menial job, but honestly, there’s a lot you can learn. I learned a whole lot about people by working in a low-level retail job,” he said.
New Lessons to Learn
With those lessons learned, Bert turned to a different type of schooling. He enrolled at CCBC to become a Certified Supervised Counselor for Alcohol and Drugs. CCBC offers over 60 tuition-free classes and Bert has decided to take advantage of the opportunity. “It’s not totally free, but it’s really cheap,” Bert said. The classes he is currently taking will allow him to work in the counseling field for 2 years while completing his certification.
He said it hasn’t been easy navigating the on-line technology associated with going to school in 2022. He had to not only learn the school’s user-unfriendly email system, but also other software and Brightspace, the educational learning platform used by CCBC.
As he approaches 65, he reflects on all he has been through over the past 10 years. He is happy where he is and is looking forward to the future. He’s even taking a spin at online dating.
Once again, he’s living on his savings, but this year he will be applying for Social Security and Medicare. Besides school, he is looking for a part-time job. “I don’t think I’ll go back to Walmart, maybe some place a little bit nicer like Wegman’s or Costco,” he said. “We’ll see what happens.”
Whatever his path, Bert knows he can handle it. “I used to worry about things all the time. I learned not to worry too much about stuff. I think about it, and I do something about it because worrying doesn’t do any good. I’ll get by,” Bert said.
Fulfilling a life long goal as a children’s author is only one of the parts of Susan Diamond Riley’s wonderful life.
While many people move to Hilton Head Island to begin their retirement, Susan Diamond Riley had a different plan. Hilton Head opened up a whole new world for her. Rather than a second act, Susan said, “I like to think of it as a second chapter.”
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Her “second chapter” began at her daughter’s graduation from the University of North Carolina Charlotte. Susan became inspired when she saw that some of the master’s degree candidates were her age and older. “I thought, ‘Wow! I could go back to school’”
At 50, it had been a long time since she’d been a student. “I thought that I had missed that boat,” Susan said. But when she saw people who had “hopped on that boat”, she decided to join them.
Driving home that night, she told her husband, “I’m going to earn my master’s degree.” She applied the next week. “I jumped on it while I was still enthusiastic and before I chickened out,” Susan said.
Choosing a Major
Susan had spent her professional career writing and editing. Even after she had left her full-time career to raise her children, she continued to do freelance work writing for local publications and taking editing jobs. But it was her work as a substitute teacher that inspired her to write for middle schoolers and led her to major in Children’s Literature.
“I had always had a goal of writing a novel, however it never took priority. It was one of those things that was a dream, but there were everyday things that took precedence,” Susan said. “I needed some accountability to make me do it.” That’s what going back to school gave her.
During her course work, she received an assignment to write a thriller. Trying to combine her interest in children’s literature with the assignment, she asked the professor if she could write a thriller for children. He said, “Hey, if you can pull it off, you can do it.”
The Origin of Her Idea
Susan was struggling to find inspiration for her assignment. While on a family vacation to Hilton Head Island, South Carolina, she asked her children and in-laws for ideas. Her children suggested setting the story on Hilton Head. Although Susan liked the idea, she found it difficult to imagine a thriller in such as idyllic setting.
Susan’s first book Sea Island’s Secret
“Maybe they find a skeleton in the salt marsh?” her mother-in-law suggested. Intrigued, Susan thought about the idea, but decided it should be an old skeleton to make it “less creepy” for her middle-school-aged readers. The story idea (which eventually became her first novel, The Sea Island’s Secret) began to develop. Soon Susan began thinking about how the skeleton could have gotten there, what event could have happened. She began researching the history of Hilton Head. “I discovered there’s tons of history in the Lowcountry.” Susan decided to weave that history and mystery together for a winning combination.
Part of that research involved taking a tour of Hilton Head with a local historian, who took her to a gated community. “There was so much history there. That neighborhood was the site of Civil War history, relics from the Spanish-American War, and it was the site of the start of the first self-governing community of freed slaves.” Susan said. “I told my husband that if we ever move down to Hilton Head full-time, we need to live in this neighborhood where we can be in the center of all that history.”
The Move to Hilton Head
Although many people move to Hilton Head to retire, that was not Susan’ plan. While writing her books in Charlotte, she had fallen in love with Hilton Head.“People assume because my books are set in Hilton Head that I was living there when I started writing them, but it was just the opposite,” Susan said.
So, shortly after she received her master’s degree, Susan and her husband of over 30 years, Steve, moved their family down to Hilton Head and into the neighborhood she had toured with the historian. Fortunately, her husband was able to continue working with his company remotely.
“Once I moved down here, I felt as though there was a lot of history in this part of the country that had been forgotten. I decided I would write books to tell those stories,” Susan said.
Her stories weave together historical events with some made-up fiction. As a former teacher, Susan loves the fact that the students are learning history that they might not learn in the classroom. However, at the end of each book, she devotes a section to clarify fact from fiction in the story.
What’s Special About Delta and Jax?
Susan’s books are about siblings from Chicago, Delta and Jax, who go to visit their grandparents on Hilton Head for the summer. They always encounter some kind of mystery from the past they have to uncover.
When asked why her books are so popular, Susan said. “The kids like the humor of the brother and sister and their friends. And they like learning about the history they haven’t been taught in their history classes.” In her books, Susan tries to give history context. “As they (Delta and Jax) are solving this mystery from the past, something’s happening in the current day too. They’re learning lessons from the past that maybe help them solve something they are dealing with in the present day.” She tries to make history relevant to her characters—and readers’—modern lives.
Bumps in the Road
Shortly after the move to Hilton Head, Steve’s company went through a transition and his position was eliminated. Although he had the opportunity to find another position within the company, he chose to take the severance package his company offered and retire at age 54. “We decided it was a sign from God,” Susan said. However, that was not without looking at the numbers and talking to their financial planner.
Then, just as Susan was getting ready for her second book to drop, COVID hit. “My second book The Sea Turtle’s Curse(exploring the Spanish explorers and Native Americans who called the Lowcountry home in the late 1600s) came out smack in the middle of COVID,” she said. She had a number of in-person events including a launch party, speaking engagements, and book festivals scheduled. “I had a full schedule of marketing events planned for the next six months,” Susan said, “and every single one of them was cancelled.”
Suddenly she had an open period, but she also had writer’s block. “Fortunately for me, other people didn’t,” Susan said. During COVID, many people took the time to do some writing, so Susan said, “I had a lot of editing business which I could do from home.”
She also began researching her next book which is due out in September, The Sea Witch’s Revenge. In her third book, Delta and Jax face a mystery involving the Revolutionary War.
During this time, Susan was able to do some virtual school visits and online writing and editing workshops for adults and kids via Zoom. She is also affiliated with the Pat Conroy Literary Center in Beaufort, SC about an hour from her home. “They kept a lot of programming going virtually. So, I taught classes, did virtual author visits, and even a couple of videos for public television.
“But there’s nothing like really being with the people,” Susan said. She is now back to in-person events. After a recent visit with a group of 8th graders, Susan received a packet of thank you notes. “You don’t get those when you’re just a face on a tv screen in their classroom,” Susan said.
Making Dreams Come True
Although, Steve ended up retiring earlier than they had planned, the couple was ready for it.
“We started planning for retirement at 25,” Susan said. The plan had always been for Steve to retire in his 50s. They had always made savings a priority and fully funded their 401Ks. But the key to their financial success was simple. “We always lived below our means,” Susan said.
She explains, “When we could have moved to a bigger house, we didn’t quite yet. When we could have gotten a bigger, fancier car, we didn’t. All with the idea that we wanted to plan for the future.” Those goals didn’t only include early retirement, but also putting their three children through college.
Even today, if they have any major financial decisions to make, they call their advisor and have him “run the numbers.”
In her “free” time, Susan likes to take advantage of all of the activities on Hilton Head. “One of the reasons we decided to move down here is because people are so physically active and the climate makes it possible,” Susan said. “We thought we’d be encouraged by all the other active people.” She swims, plays pickleball, and takes walks on the beach. She sometimes plays golf, but her husband plays golf several days a week.
She loves making her own hours and having her husband have that same flexibility. “He is so much more relaxed,” she said. “We have been able to make so many friends here in such a short period of time because we have more time to socialize.”
In addition, her family has recently had some health issues to deal with and she said, “Our neighbors have come out of the woodwork to help by offering rides, making meals, and giving emotional support.” She said she doesn’t think it would have been like that anywhere else they’ve lived because people were busy working.
Because of the couple’s many new friends and active social life, “Our kids say it’s like we’re in college again except we don’t have to go to classes,” Susan said. “I highly recommend it.”
“We love it down here. We really do.”
Her biggest issue is that she needs to learn to say no. There is always something to do and she wants to be involved in everything. “I want to do all the things,” Susan said, but adds that she needs to balance her social and volunteer activities with her time writing the Delta and Jax mysteries and her “day job” as a freelance editor.
Health Care Before Medicare
For many people over 60, healthcare is a huge issue. Susan said they were fortunate to qualify for her husband’s company healthcare plan after he retired, but they did weigh all the options available. “We looked into getting private insurance. We knew there were good options out there. We could have gotten something for slightly less than we pay now, but a lot of those plans restrict you to a certain state,” Susan said. They ultimately chose a plan that wouldn’t restrict them to one state since Hilton Head is so close to the Georgia border.
“People stay in jobs that they frankly hate just for the healthcare,” Susan said. “It’s an urban legend that you can’t retire until you get Medicare because otherwise you won’t have health insurance.”
She encourages people who are using lack of health insurance as an excuse not to retire to look into insurance options more. “It’s not that black and white at all. There are a lot of options for health insurance in retirement.”
Advice for People Ready to Make a Change
Although, the word retirement does not exactly describe Susan’s life on Hilton Head, she and her husband made some big changes after 50. She began a new career and her husband retired from his. Susan often has to remind her friends, “My husband is retired. I’m not retired.” She’s self-employed and is learning to balance her work with all the other activities available to her, but she wouldn’t change a thing.
She has some advice for people looking to make a big change in their lives. “I’m a big proponent of lists. So, if you need to, make a list of the pros and cons. Then, check the numbers. Your chances of success are better if you know it’s financially feasible,” Susan said.
But even if retirement isn’t an option right now, Susan’s advice is to figure out a way to make your dreams a reality. Her philosophy is: “A thousand things can happen between now and dinner time. So, better now than later.” Even before beginning her new career as a writer, Susan and her husband were ticking things off on their bucket list including visiting all 50 states.
“If there’s something that’s on your bucket list, do it. What are you waiting for?” Susan said. “Figure out a way to make it happen while you can.”
Susan is enjoying her life on Hilton Head, her career as an author/editor, and life with her husband Steve. She is currently working on her fourth novel The Sea Devil’s Demise, set in the early 1700s and involving a reader favorite: pirates.
If you want to find out more about Susan and her career, visit her website at SusanDiamondRiley.com.
If you know someone who would make a great subject for my blog, email me at ksparis15@gmail.com.
From IT professional to a traveling man, Geoff Prior is having the time of his life.
“I made it to the bonus territory,” Geoffrey Prior said. At 57, he had lived longer than his own father and he knew he wanted to do something special with the extra time he had.
Geoff was ready to make a change in his life and decided he needed to transition from his busy lifestyle traveling around the world as an IT executive. He took a job where he worked from home and started to wind down. Then Geoff got hit hard with sciatica and he began to wonder, “Is it too late?” Too late to have the type of retirement he dreamed of filled with hiking, biking and traveling.
He steeled his resolve to get healthy and knew then it was time to retire. In 2019, at the age of 59, he and his wife decided they had sufficient money so he could retire. There was still a question of health care. Geoff said they decided to take advantage of the Affordable Care Act. “I’m loving it,” Geoff said. He admits that initially there were bureaucratic hassles, but now he says, “it’s the best health care I’ve ever had.”
Beginning His Dream Retirement
Geoff knew he wanted to make travel a priority in retirement. As an IT executive, he had spent much of his life traveling around the world for work. He knew his retirement travel would be totally different since he wouldn’t have the finances for planes and hotels, but his priority was more to just see new places.
So, he bought a travel van, not the VW Campervan of our youth. Instead, it was a 2019 Travato Campervan with a bathroom, shower, refrigerator, stove and two beds. His first trip was a 72-day trip across the country that was a high school graduation present for his son.
Because his own father died when he was 12, he never had experiences like that with him, so spending time with his son was important. They started down south in the Smokey Mountains and then travelled west through St. Louis, Kansas then up to Lake Superior, Rochester and Cape Cod. Along the way they took biking trips on “Rails to Trails”. Geoff said, “Miraculously, we got along great”.
This first trip only made him want more and he began planning trips every year. The next summer during 2020 he went on a 3-month trip during which he spent much of his time alone. This trip was difficult because of COVID. Even as a self-described introvert, the lack of interaction with others, even as simple as going into a diner and eating with other people around him, was a challenge. But Geoff said he was always “comfortable with himself” and he spent time exploring and taking pictures.
His five-month 2021 adventure was a little easier and his wife, who lost her job during COVID, was able to join him for part of the trip as well as his son for another part. They traveled in his van visiting Colorado, Utah, Nevada, California, Oregon, Washington and Arizona. As the summer drew to a close, not yet full of travel, Geoff headed north on his own to visit Glacier, Banff, Jasper, the Tetons, and Yellowstone National Parks.
A New Hobby/Business is Born
An additional benefit of his traveling retirement has been starting a side business, GRP Imagery, where he sells the photos he takes while traveling.
Geoff had been taking pictures for years of the family vacations and important events. But something changed when he started taking pictures to document his travels. He started sharing them on Facebook and Instagram and received great feedback from his family and friends. Then he decided to upgrade to a Sony a7iii full-frame camera and an assortment of lenses.
“I realized they (his pictures) were as good as any picture I had seen on the internet,” Geoff said. In fact, they are so good, he has started entering them in contests and winning! His first win was a photo he entered through the Glacier National Park Conservancy Photo Contest.
Geoff’s Winning Photograph
The photo was an example of Astro-Landscape Photography. This is a type of photography Geoff specializes in. It is exactly what it sounds like, shooting a landscape with the Milky Way in the background. To get these pictures he needs to wake up early and take photos between 2-4 a.m. or stay up late and shoot after 10 p.m. To get the perfect picture he takes multiple pictures. 10-15 and stacks them.
He also selected as a category winner in the Stewardship Network 2021 Nature Photo Contest for his picture of a goat. “I take full advantage of serendipitous moments,” Geoff said. The day he took the goat picture, he wasn’t taking pictures of animals, but a goat jumped down right in front of him and another awarding winning picture was born.
One of his favorite photo stories is about his trip down the Oregon Coast. He describes capturing a sunset at the Yaquina Head Lighthouse.
It was so beautiful that he stayed there much longer than he should have and wasn’t sure where he was going to sleep. Luckily, there was a Walmart nearby and he “Wally-Docked”, which means taking your camper and sleeping in a Walmart parking lot. Not only does Walmart allow this, but also you can “Cracker-Dock” at Cracker Barrel.
He was able to stay so close to the lighthouse that he got up in the morning to take sunrise photos as well.
Life At Home
Geoff has 1,000s of photographs and spends hours processing when he’s home. He is also taking classes that can help enhance his career. “I took Adobe Illustrator through CCBC online,” Geoff said. CCBC has a program where people over 60 can take classes tuition-free.
This class will help him with his photography business. “I love having the opportunity to explore new things,” Geoff said.
He considers himself a “rookie retiree” who’s still learning how to manage his time, especially when he is home. He’s been considering getting a part-time job, but doesn’t want it to interfere with his ability travel.
Right now, he’s preparing for his road trip to Alaska (which has been on his bucket list for years), entering more contests and selling his photography through GRP Imagery.
Geoff’s advice for other individuals considering retirement. “Don’t wait until it’s too late.” He said he has never regretted his decision to retire early.
For school teacher to media mogul, Tom Pless is having the best retirement ever.
When Tom Pless retired in 2017, after more than 40 years as a public-school teacher, he had no idea that just a few years later, he would be running an internet radio station with more than a million listeners worldwide.
“I got in at the right time and I got out at the right time,” Tom said of his teaching career.
Although there were many things he still enjoyed about teaching, one thing made the decision to leave relatively easy. “I left because I had the golden ticket,” Tom said. He had more than 30 years of public service and he was 66 years old, which meant he could retire with a comfortable pension and good health care coverage.
Having his finances and health care taken care of, Tom was more concerned about staying busy, then making money. “I needed a purpose,” Tom said.
The Origins of 97 Underground
He found that purpose at 97 Underground.com, a pure rock station that he had started over 40 years ago.
Tom began working in radio and television in 1974 part-time to help supplement his teaching income. Then in the 1980s, he began 97 Underground, an FM radio station, at Dundalk High School where he taught. The students participated in the running of the station and used it as a learning experience.
After a while Tom took the station off the air until the concept of internet radio was introduced. He then ran the station out of the high school as a music box, a station that simply plays music with no programing or commercials.
Prior to retiring, Tom attempted to partner 97 Underground.com with the new HammerJacks Nightclub in Baltimore, but when that deal fell through, he decided to run the station out of a studio from his home.
With the help of a friend, he built a fully functioning studio in his basement. “I bought all the pieces on eBay,” Tom said and his new 97 Underground.com internet radio station was born or reborn.
Back then, in 2017, Tom had no more than 15,000 listeners. Now he has Roku and Amazon FireTV stations as well as in his App on Apple and Android and social media channels. You can even buy a T-shirt through his store, Metal Merch Nation. He’s become a media mogul.
A Typical Day at the “Office”
Now, he starts his day with a cup, no a gallon of coffee. Then he gets to work on his station scheduling music and programs, creating slides and commercial spots for his sponsors and advertisers and hustling to get more exposure.
Whiskey Samples from Heaven Hill
One of his biggest advertisers and sponsors is Elijah Craig Bourbon from Heaven Hill Distillery. Tom is a whisky aficionado and during his show , The Phantom’s Lair, Wednesdays from 2-4 p.m., he dispenses quality pours for review on the “Whiskey Wisdom” segment of the weekly live broadcast. During this time, Tom tastes and rates different whiskeys provided by Heaven Hill.
He not only provides radio spots for these sponsors, but also creates slides that are displayed on his multiple outlets.
When he compares his life now to when he was working, he said, “Same amount of hours. Same amount of stress. No personal contact. That’s the one thing I hate about this work, no personal contact,” Tom said
But don’t let him fool you, the smile that spreads across his face as he talks about 97 Underground.com says it all.
What Makes 97 Underground Different
His radio station has grown over the years to include 15 different hosts each bringing their own unique perspective to rock music. Many of them have loved music almost as long as Tom has and he has hosts that are from as far away as Great Britain.
97 Underground.com plays rock music from the 1970s and 1980s. Much of the music is fairly mainstream until 9 p.m. when the station plays harder music during “Nasty at Night.” 97 Underground.com has everything, plus one thing that makes his station a little different from other rock stations — he plays new music.
Tom is always looking for new music and enjoys discovering new bands. He spends Fridays listening to new music and gets “bombarded” with emails from new artists saying, “Please play my record.”
Not only does playing new music give him a unique sound, but it also helps promote his station. Tom posts a playlist of the songs he will be playing that week and the featured bands promote his station on their social media sites.
Tom also wants to find out how his listeners feel about the music he’s playing. He surveys his listeners to find out what songs are their favorites.
One of his favorite stories is about a new talent he discovered, Abby K, a female bass player. He helped her get her first gig outside her home state of North Carolina. She and her band played at the Ottobar. Now she is living in Nashville making a name for herself and has already put out eight singles.
What the Future Holds
For a self-described “analog person in a digital world”, Tom has become very tech savvy running five different pieces of software and producing all the commercials.
One thing he doesn’t like about internet radio is that listeners have to find him intentionally. “It’s not like the old days when you were sitting in the car searching through stations, Tom said. However, over a million people have made the effort.
Tom and Ron Keel from The Ron Keel band
At 71, Tom shows no signs of stopping. Next month his is doing the Red Carpet at the Central Pennsylvania Music Hall of Fame. He will be playing music and interviewing the bands.
He also has plans to broadcast live from a rock festival in Atlantic City and for the upcoming Bike Rally in Dundalk as well as other music events. These live presentations and word of mouth are where Tom gets his listeners.
For Tom, every day is a new adventure. “It’s my world. I have a purpose,” Tom said.
When asked about his advice for others considering retirement he said, “You have to have a plan. Inactivity causes you to become complacent.” That word will never be used to describe Tom Pless.
Many people dream of retiring to a Caribbean Island, but my friends Bill and Anne “Bunny” Horton actually did it.
Bill and Bunny enjoying retirement.
Many people dream of retiring to a Caribbean Island, but my friends Bill and Anne “Bunny” Horton actually did it. Four years ago, they packed up their home in Florida and moved to the scenic Island of Bonaire.
Bonaire is a Caribbean Island recognized as a special municipality of the Netherlands. It is part of what is referred to as the ABC islands – Aruba, Bonaire and Curacao. Bonaire is the least populated (21,000 residents) and least developed of the three islands. There is modest tourism and has sea salt production as its primary industries. It is a desert island, receiving only 22 inches of rainfall annually and is located outside the ‘Hurricane Belt’ of the Caribbean. The temperature fluctuates between the high 70s to low 90s Fahrenheit. (They use the Celsius scale on Bonaire.)
The island of Bonaire.
Bill and Bunny’s first introduction to Bonaire was during a two-week cruise from Florida back to their home state of Maryland with multiple stops along the way. For long-time scuba divers Bill and Bunny, Bonaire offered an amazing underwater experience. But it was during dinner and drinks at a local restaurant that made them realize there was something special about Bonaire.
Sitting at the bar, looking out over the water, they immediately felt comfortable. It wasn’t only the diving, but it was also the warmth of the people. Having worked with the Dutch for much of their careers at IBM and AT&T (Royal Dutch Shell was one of Bill’s last customers), Bill and Bunny were both familiar with the culture.
They also thought it was the perfect place for their son to begin his professional dive certification. Their son actually moved down there prior to their move to prepare for his certification.
Beginning Their Retirement Plan
Back home, Bill had already retired in 2015. Having been declared “excess” by his employer, AT&T, he was given 60 days to either move to Texas for a job within the company or leave. Long ago disenchanted with corporate America, Bill made the decision to take his severance package and leave.
Bunny was still working for AT&T, but she too was ready for a change. Feeling unappreciated, and ready to leave the corporate world, the two began planning for retirement. Previously they had thought briefly of Hawaii, but after a visit there for Bunny’s 50th birthday, it didn’t seem like quite the right fit.
They couldn’t get Bonaire out of their minds and in 2016, they took at two-week vacation to Bonaire to check it out as a potential forever home.
“I don’t want to go home to Florida – I feel like THIS is home,” Bunny told her husband, but she knew she couldn’t retire yet. They spent the next two years planning their “FLExit” (their Florida Exit, as Bill likes to call it).
Fantasy Meets Reality
Bill had always been the numbers guy and set up a budget to see how much it would cost to live in Bonaire. “I came pretty close to the number,” Bill said with a chuckle, “I only underestimated air for our dive tanks and alcohol.”
However, to make the plan work, Bunny would have to stay until 2018 to meet the pension requirements of AT&T.
That didn’t stop them from planning and preparing. Bill joined expat Facebook groups to find out more about what life was like on Bonaire. They met with their financial advisor to ensure their investments would sustain them in retirement. Finally, they started paring down their possessions in Florida and looking for real estate in Bonaire. They were committed to not having a mortgage.
Health Care on Bonaire
One important aspect of Bonaire is national health care for residents. That means that all their health care is paid for by the government. “It’s quality health care,” Bill said. He and Bunny have had to take advantage of the system several times since they moved down there. “There are a few specialists on island,” Bill said. Specialists are often scheduled to come from Aruba, Curacao and even the European Netherlands to treat patients on Bonaire. Sometimes residents need to leave the island for health care, and the island insurance coordinates everything needed. During those times the government not only pays all costs for the patient, but also the caregiver. This coverage includes flights, hotel, transportation and a food per diem.
Realities of Island Life
But both Bill and Bunny warn that island life is not for everyone. There are only four US based businesses on island. There are no malls, no Amazon direct deliveries, even the grocery store has a selection which is very limited on brands and items, in general. “ There may be only 7 salad dressings to chose from rather than the fifty or more that the US stores carry. You may be not see bananas for weeks. You have to get used to that,” they said.
They rely on people coming from the states to bring them luxuries like Triscuits, Cheese-Its, Crab cakes and Berger Cookies (It’s a Baltimore thing.) Two times a year they order a big shipment from Amazon and others to be cargo shipped to the island to get technology items, bathing suits and shorts (all they ever wear), heavy items, even 350+lbs of their cats’ preferred litter (which will last a year or more). The shipments take roughly 2 weeks to receive once they leave Miami, so patience for getting items they want is critical. Of course, this shipping to the island also increases the total cost of the items by as much as 30%.
Also, things happen on Bonaire time. Stores are often closed in the middle of the day for a couple of hours for lunch and then close early in the evening. Roads may have long lasting pot holes or are simply dirt and are not up to the standard most Americans are used to. While there are nice restaurants, there are not a lot of other nightlife establishments.
“I’m over the moon.”
Bill and Bunny have seen many neighbors make the move to Bonaire only to see them then leave after little more than a year. But for Bunny, it’s paradise. “I’m over the moon. I’m so happy, but I’m a simple person,” she said.
“On Bonaire, you can just go to the beach and dive in,” Bunny said. They often scuba dive twice a day, 4-5 times a week. As a marine biology major in college, Bunny said she would even go more often if she could.
OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA
They wake up around 10 am, make the bed, eat breakfast, feed the local birds, iguanas and chickens, swim in the pool and dive. They have also worked with the local rescue organizations committed to helping sea turtles and the restoration of the coral reefs.
At night they love going to their tower, a perfect spot for sipping wine while looking out over the sea, the island landscape & the small airport. Parakeets zoom by and neighbors stroll the quiet road and wilderness trails.
After enjoying a nice dinner, Bill and Bunny spend time looking for funny videos and comedy online. If they are lucky, they may even have a few of the wild donkeys come by for a treat of apples. “Even the donkeys smile here,” Bunny said. They are loving life and enjoying being happy.
The day after Bunny retired, she flew down to Bonaire, where Bill had been getting settled in with the house and pets, and they began their new life. Four years later, they have absolutely no regrets.
Before You Move
If this sounds like the life for you, here are the requirements for becoming a resident on Bonaire:
Pensioners (retirees) need at least $20,000 in annual income
Need a place to stay (Own a home or have a rental agreement)
Clean FBI record
Proof of marriage or have a statement of singularity (A statement that you are single can take up to 2 months to get in the US. Gay marriage is recognized in Bonaire.)
Animals can be brought into the country as long as they have a USDA health certificate
If you’d like to know more about Bonaire or a Caribbean retirement, Bill and Bunny can be reached at Bill&Bunny@FL4Some.com.
If you know someone who has a great retirement story, send me an email to KarenParis15@gmail.com
For those of you who have been following my blog since the beginning, you might remember that my husband and I have been talking about Latitude Margaritaville in Hilton Head, SC (It’s really Hardeeville, but it’s branded as Hilton Head) for over two years. Why wouldn’t someone want to live where the party never ends and Jimmy Buffet’s laid back lifestyle is the template for life over 55?
It took my husband a minute to wrap his mind around visiting because he isn’t ready to move, but when I told him it was a two to three year wait for a house, he agreed.
We decided to participate in the Latitude Getaway option (formerly known as the Stay and Play). That option allows you to stay on the campus in one of the villas and enjoy all the amenities. You even get a golf cart to use during your stay there. It costs $199 a night and is well worth the price if you are serious about moving there.
I am fortunate to have a friend from high school Sherry Zuback Bean who lives in the community. She served as our personal tour guide and it just so happened that she lived right across the street from where we were staying.
First impressions
The community is beautiful with a Caribbean flair . The houses are all one level and very nicely laid out. All the houses have a two-car garage. Check! Also, the guest room and extra bathroom are away from the primary bedroom. Remember this is set up for people over 55, so guests are going to be temporary.
Our villa came in a floor plan that is no longer available, but it still gave us a good idea of what it would be like to live there. Also, the villa came with a margarita machine. That thing was awesome. Apparently they used to give new residents one when they moved in, but they no longer do. I would have to buy one if we moved there. My husband said it was the best margarita he ever had.
Housing Options
We spent one afternoon touring 12 model homes. I loved having a chance to view all the models side-by-side. It definitely helped us get a better idea of what each on included, although there were a lot of upgrades. Still, there was a complete list of what was included and what wasn’t.
There are three different configurations of houses. The Cottages are set up in a quad with four driveways facing each other. It forms almost a little communal area for the homes. This is the least expensive option.
Then there are the Villas where two houses are attached. There are multiple styles and the Villas are spacious.
Finally, there are the Single Family homes that are not for families. No children except for a quick visit with grandma and grandpa.
All the options are great, it’s really about what you’re looking for and what you want to spend. When you’re looking at prices (I know you are already searching the website) the prices do not include the lots. Lots are priced separately and vary in price depending on your view.
What you gonna do?
Listen, relaxation is definitely available. There is one of the nicest pools I’ve ever seen and the margaritas are delicious and inexpensive, but people don’t just lounge in the sun every day. There is so much to do.
Of course, they have Pickle Ball and Pickle Ball leagues, but there’s also lawn bowling and tennis. However there are also, so many clubs including the Wine Fairies, Bible Groups, Choir, Writing Clubs and more. My husband wants to join a band down there so he can keep playing his bass.
And of course, there’s karaoke! After dinner at the Bar & Chill, we joined the karaoke night. There is video of me singing, but I threatened my husband if he posted it.
What really struck us about the evening was how supportive everyone was. Every singer was applauded, even me, and the audience was totally engaged. There were definitely some great singers and we met some of them personally when we accidentally crashed the choir practice the next day.
We took advantage of the state-of-the-art fitness club which included free weights, machines, a wide variety of cardio machines, fitness classes, an indoor pool and saunas.
I set up a morning swim in the lap lanes. I had a lane all to myself. It was great, but they have to be reserved ahead of time.
After the workout, we visited the Cinnabon food truck (Hey, I worked out first!) Luckily, it’s only there once a month or I could have a serious problem.
There really is truly something for everybody and the only time we saw people sitting around was at the bar. Of course, they were probably sitting at the big BINGO game, but it was sold out and we couldn’t get a ticket.
The next day, I decided to participate in one of the fitness classes — Fit Yoga. The instructor kicked my butt — the class was not for sissys. In the class, I met someone who had moved down from Philadelphia. She said she cried the whole first year they were there because she missed the city and ethnic food. Apparently, Mexican is the only ethnic food they do well down there.
It was great meeting her and getting a different perspective. She has stopped crying, has made friends and is planning a trip back to Philadelphia to eat.
The Next Step
After lunch, we got ready for the hard sell where they lock you in a room until you sign. Instead we met with our assigned salesperson, Caleb. He was pleasant and informative with an interactive screen so we could see all the floor plans and make virtual changes to the plans to meet our individual taste and needs. No hard sell. No reason, there’s a HUGE waiting list.
Yes, we put our name on the list, why not? It didn’t cost anything.
After our meeting, we went back to the Villa and relaxed on our screened in lanai drinking margaritas before dinner.
During the 10 hour ride back home, we talked about the prospect of moving. I have lived in the same town all my life, so the thought of moving is pretty scary, but we have time to think. It’s always fun to dream.
We will be going back for another visit. You can do two Latitude Getaways, so we are planning another one for early next year. My husband said, “If we have a heavy snowfall next year, you’ll have leverage.”
One thing that’s for sure, if we move to Margaritaville, we won’t be wasting away. We’ll be working out, walking, joining clubs, going to events, etc. I’ll let you know what we decide. Until then, we’ll just chill.
If you know a person or subject that you think would make a good subject for my blog, please send me an email at ksparis15@gmail.com
